How can I convince my mother the JW's are wrong?

by schnare 40 Replies latest jw experiences

  • clarity

    Jeffro ..... of course Harold .... didn't you ever hear his song?

    Harkthe Harold angels sing

    I know I know .... my bad tonite!

  • mind blown
    mind blown

    I know how frustrating it is....I'm going through the same thing. But Nugget is correct. One has to be ready or it's only a temporary fix.

    You can ask her if God would use a criminal like Charles Taze Russell to represent his name? Below is all the disgusting things he did which is documented fact.

  • losthobbit

    Just going to summarize what I consider to be the best points discussed so far:

    • Talk together about another group that the person would agree is a problematic group. Then ask “How is your group not like this?” or “Help me to explain to others how your group is not like this group?” Leave a long silence.

    • JW's hate contradictions.

    • You can't make conclusions for her. She has to arrive at them herself. Show her something, then ask her to do the explaining. You shut up and make her talk.

    • Only talk about ONE subject at a time.

    I also have a mother in a cult. Unfortunately nothing I've ever tried has ever worked. I do have an idea for you, which might help. I have no idea if it will, but it makes sense in my mind. I've learned from this forum that a couple of people here have left the JW's after reading up on the history of the JW cult.

    Perhaps you could try something like this: "Okay mom, you win... you obviously know a lot more about the cult than I do, and I want to learn more about it. I want to learn about its history. How about we learn about its history together?"

    What you do then is to research it's history and find a bunch of useful sites. Then, together you sit in front of a computer and look up stuff. Get her to summarize as you find information and write it down. Keep repeating things like "Thank you for teaching my about the history of the cult"... to try and make her feel good about it, and as if it was her idea.

    Don't disagree with her, but instead keep asking her questions, like "Don't you think that's strange?"

    By the way, I have no idea if using the word "cult" will help at all, but perhaps if she says "It's not a cult", get her to explain EXACTLY why it is not a cult... and keeps saying "I don't understand... please explain."

    Good luck :)

  • losthobbit

    If she tries to argue that JW's are not a cult you could try using this as a checklist:

  • losthobbit

    One more thought... you might be able to use peer pressure to your advantage, by including other people in your conversations, like if you have a brother or sister or father who cares.

  • Nathan Natas
    Nathan Natas

    In my experience, the only method that comes close it that time-tried and approved method of the inquisition, torture.

    Even then, there is the lingering ghost of a doubt about the sincerity of the wails and screams bubbling forth from the tortured lips.

    Every time I have triedd to live someone else's life for them, even for just a little while, it did not work out well.

    Bottom line: SAVE YOURSELF first, and then accept that some people will not want to be saved. That's life.

  • Phizzy

    I agree Nathan, a wise man said "When the student is ready, the Teacher shall arrive".

    Some "students" are never ready, especially for the truth, and especially if that truth is about the JW/WT so-called "truth".

  • hubert

    I think the best thing to try here is "Losthobbit's" suggestion.

    A history study. Try to get your Mom to do a history study of the J.W. "religion". Don't call it a cult. Even tell her "If you can convince me that the J.W.'s had it right from the beginning, I might come around to the religion".

    I know, it's a lie, but j.w.'s lie too, to "protect the organization". So, why can't you, to draw out your loved ones from it?

    Then like "lost" says, let HER find the answers. Give her the impression that you are really interested. When you study a certain subject, let HER do the research. I think in time, with this approach, you may get some results. Good luck.


  • sseveninches

    Concerning the bit about Noah preaching, the Bible indeed does not say that Noah was ordered to preach. I remember a CO mentioned this during one of his talks while he was at my congregation. Does any Watchtower literature say the opposite? If so, I would very much like to see it.

  • losthobbit

    Thanks Hubert :)

    Schnare, I found an interesting post on this site, which hopefully will inspire you.

    It's posted by HB at

    "... I now know that to start with, (being very ignorant about JW beliefs at the time), to my great regret, I was reasoning with my friend in completely the wrong way, attacking her belief in Jehovah directly rather than getting her to question for herself the basis of JW teachings but I didn't realise this until later.

    Once I joined this forum and started learning what the Watchtower Org is about, several people gave me good advice but particularly a poster called 'Mr Majestic' who emailed me regularly and taught me how to behave and react and drip-feed information to my friend without setting off her 'apostate' alarm bells.

    It took some time and ingenuity, but I eventually managed to get Mr Majestic and my friend together (long story). He used the bible and the WT Societies' own literature to open her eyes and thereby restored her sanity and returned her to her grateful family. As a JW she was constantly fearful and depressed but now she has a life and a future. (She will be in London auditioning for the X factor on Monday!) Another success story thanks to this website. She posted on here as 'Blooming Marvellous' a few times.

    She and Mr Maj are now best of friends which is great, especially in view of the fact that when they first met, she acted as if he was the devil incarnate..."

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