New here, need support: I wrote an open letter regarding my issues with JWs

by exjehovah 35 Replies latest jw friends

  • 3rdgen
    3rdgen

    Exjehovah and Enda75: WELCOME This is such a good place to be when you need comfort, advice, to vent, or sometimes a good 'ole laugh!

    I'm very sorry for the terrible losses and pain you and your family have suffered. So many here (including myself) can relate to the hurtful practices of the WT$ and the brutal effect these have on so many. Who ever heard of a group not letting someone politely disagree or leave???

    Enda 75 So good that you didn't get babtized Look foreward to hearing more from you both.

  • exjehovah
    exjehovah

    I really appreciate reading the posts of everyone. I will definitely PM a few people, if that's okay.

    Truth is I am angry, and I don't want to be angry. I just know of so much hypocrisy it just boggles my mind. However, I feel like being angry or lashing out just validates this cult in a sick twisted way. I don't want to give them the upper hand even in my complete contempt.

    This site is bookmarked and I will post in this thread and others. I am also trying to create an arsenal of facts just for my own reference regarding the UN, blood, 144,000, 1914, disfellowshipping, the founding members of the organization, etc

    Everyone have a great evening!!

  • ABibleStudent
    ABibleStudent

    exjehovah - This site is bookmarked and I will post in this thread and others. I am also trying to create an arsenal of facts just for my own reference regarding the UN, blood, 144,000, 1914, disfellowshipping, the founding members of the organization, etc

    Hi exjehovah, Have you read Raymond Franz's books (i.e., "Crisis of Conscience" and "In Search of Christian Freedom")? I can also recommend visiting www.jwfacts.com, www.watchtowerdocuments.com, and www.freeminds.org and many others for morte information about the WTBTS. Here is a video of Raymond Franz:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6c6I0fjiYNU

    Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,

    Robert

  • wasblind
    wasblind

    Welcome to the Forum exjehovah and enda75 . .

    Also check out JWFACTS.NET and Freeminds.net

  • NewChapter
    NewChapter

    Welcome ExJW and Enda!

    Exjw, that opening post was very well put. You really captured so much about our experience. I should print it and read it to remind myself of how completely brutal and destructive this cult is. Thank you for writing it and sharing it. Hang around, and you'll get help with the anger. Vent, Vent, Vent all you want. No thought police here.

    NC

  • smiddy
    smiddy

    WOW !! what a Ist post exjehovah and welcome

    Welcome to you also enda75

    look forward to hear more from both of you

    smiddy

  • shepherd
    shepherd

    Welcome to the forum as exjehovah. On reading all the apostate keywords like kool aid etc and from the specific subjects you raised it's very unlikely you are really new to the site but I did agree with all you wrote.

  • outsmartthesystem
    outsmartthesystem

    Welcome. I agree that this is a place to vent. Vent all you want. JW's wonder why "apostates" are so angry. They reason to themselves that they are angry because "they've left Jehovah". No. the truth is.....they are angry because of all the unjust behavior they've witnessed over the years.

    But I do have one suggestion. While your letter is very well put.....it does carry an awfully indignant tone. Which is ok for this forum. This forum is filled with people just like you who have gone through or are going through your same pain. I would however, suggest against making that an "open letter".....(i.e. plastering it all over the internet).

    As I alluded to earlier, it is that indignant tone (though justified) that gives seeming credence to the Witnesses claim that all apostates and all those critical of their organization are filled with hate.

    Let me give you a situation of how Witnesses turn such a situation into an opportunity to look good. This is a first hand experience from back when I was a faithful/devout Witness. A co-worker found out I was a witness. He told me about a previous job he had where he was friends with someone who was a former witness. He told me about how his friend shared with him "a lot of dark stuff about witnesses". He brought up flip flopping doctrine....allowing children to die.....shunning of disfellowshipped members...etc. He said that his friend was really bitter about leaving the group. So what did I do? Being the devout, mind controlled, pre-programmed robot that I was.....I used that opportunity to "witness" to him. I flipped the tables. I asked if he had verified all the claims his friend made about the witnesses. (which of course he hadn't......thankfully) I explained that witnesses do not allow children to die (lie). I told him that only those that have done very very bad things get disfellowshipped. (lie) I told him that those that are disfellowshipped aren't completely shunned....we just chose to limit association with such ones because after all....bad association does indeed spoil useful habbits. (lie). I explained to him that many former members are now former members because of their own foolish actions and because they've chosen to lead a disgusting life. And then they blame the poor witnesses for their own decisions.

    His stance began to soften when he saw how much blame I (undeservedly) heaped back onto his disfellowshipped friend. I told him it was just like a disgruntled employee leaving his firm. I said "do you think you would get an honest answer of what it was like working at that place by asking a disgruntled former employee?".

    He fell for it. He never studied with me but he did accept some publications from me and he believed me when I told him that his friend was nothing but a disgruntled former member and that's how apostates are. Always telling lies and showing hatred of God's celestial chariot.

    Just like that...I used a classic straw man argument....attacked it....defeated it and looked like a hero. I am going to go throw up now.

  • Terry
    Terry

    The situation, reduced to basics, is an ugly breakup.

    The richest, most-handsome guy in town from the finest family courts you and throws his best at you to win you over.

    Happily ever after is what it is all about.

    But, then....

    After you are HIS he shows another side! He is proud and won't admit when he's at fault. He's stingy but demands that you give, give, give to his needs. He won't listen when you talk. He demands that you to hear him! He likes to talk about the violence he's going to visit on his enemies. He expects you to talk about it too. You catch him lying. You get different stories at different times. Everybody is wrong BUT him. He refuses to allow you to better yourself. You have him--what do you need anything else for? He won't allow a fair hearing. The second you say anything critical he turns on you and suddenly--you are defending your own self!

    You leave him.

    Years later he won't talk to you, won't let you see your kids. Bad mouths you to all your old friends who now regard you with contempt.

    It is the oldest scenario there is. Except, it isn't a rich, handsom guy from the finest family we are talking about: IT IS JEHOVAH.

    You can't get any justice or traction with JW's.

    JW= Jerk Wads

  • Giordano
    Giordano

    I'd keep your family contact cool,calm and limited. Looking back I am sorry that I tried to maintain a real relationship with my mother and sister. Even though I have lived a good honest life, provided for my family even helped my mother with the cost of her assisted living I knew I, my wife and son were not valued by them.

    Your best armor are the facts about the JW's. Getting past one's rage and anger is hard to do but that will come if you keep some distance. Being on this site does help.

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