Do You Miss Even A Little Bit Your "Friends" From The "Truth"?

by minimus 43 Replies latest jw friends

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  punkofnice

  Magwitch -

  I have so many great, fun friends now that it is hard to miss the unhappy, hypochondriac, hypocritical associates.

  Well said. I found I had ZERO in common with most of them and they brought me down. Always moaning about how bad the 'world' is. They relish bad things happening.

  My 'worldly' friends are so much more positive and friendly. My 'worldly' friends won't turn on me if I'm seen buying an 'R' rated movie or something on their own personal list of 'no no's'. My 'worldly' friends are always there for me, not just because I conform to some cult standard.
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  00DAD

  There are a few that I miss, but mostly not. This is ironically sad considering that we all referred to each other as "the friends", but in reality they are just other people pretending to be something they are not in an organization that pretends to be something it is not.

  It would be different if the loyalty was truly to God, but it is to The WTBTS and its control-freakery manipulative mind-control policies.

  What a sad condemnation of the whole WT theology that a person could devote decades of their life to the organization, the congregation and trying diligently to serve others, but then be abandoned, cast-aside and shunned by all his supposed friends for having marital difficulties. When I really needed the help and support of the congregation, my "brothers and sisters", my fellow elders and my supposed friends, I was instead thrown out after a 1/2 hour star-chamber meeting. In the 2 1/2 years since no one has done a thing to see how I'm faring or to help.

  On the WTBTS Media Website the claim is made that "Every effort is made to help wrongdoers."

  What a complete and total lie. They should be ashamed of themselves!
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  00DAD

  On the other hand, I now have many REAL friends that are friends simply because they care about me as a person and enjoy my company and I enjoy theirs, not because we're pretending to "prove" that this really is God's Organization .... NOT
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  bats in the belfry

  Shying away from education leaves one scrambling for those people able to hold a conversation. Many of them 'friends' are not the brightest bulb in the drawer. If you find one, you've got a winner !
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  OUTLAW

  Given the Opportunity..

  There isn`t one Loyal WBT$ JW..

  That wouldn`t Stab you in the Back for the WBT$..

  "It`s good to see you!"

  "Isn`t the WBT$ a Wonderful Organization?"

  (This would be a good time to come up with the right answer..)

  

  .....................;-)...OUTLAW
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  minimus

  I got a call from an elder friend of mine who told me yesterday, that a very nice Witness, who I heard simply stopped going to the meetings a few years back, suddenly died. He was about 63 and was single and very funny and sweet and probably gay. His large family is still in the "Truth" but barely.

  This guy was simply a nice person. He would be your friend whether you were a Witness or not.
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  iCeltic

  Yes and no, but it has to be said, mostly no, simply because if a friendship is based upon whether or not you attend the KH then it's not really a friendship at all.

  What I seriously regret is allowing myself to abandon friends that I had years ago because I was told I couldn't be friends with people who weren't 'in the truth' only to end up completely on my own when I left the JW. I guess that's what I get for doing that myself all those years ago.
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  Quendi

  There are a handful that I miss and I wish they would leave this godless, faithless and accursed organization. The chances of that happening are small, however, and so I've said farewell to them in my heart. Considering the fact that I've promised myself never to set foot in a Kingdom Hall again for any reason whatsoever, I know I'm much better off on the outside. I'm learning to live my own life now and am all the happier for it.

  Many of the "friendships" I had in the organization were superficial ones anyway. Many of the people I knew made no effort to cultivate a real personal relationship with me and discouraged me from having one with them. There were a few people I genuinely loved, but since being disfellowshipped, I have had virtually no contact with them with one notable exception. As for the elders, none has sought me out, made any arrangements to see me during the time of the year the organization directs elders to seek out the disfellowshipped and disassociated, nor has anyone inquired as to whether I would want to return. Seeing that our dislike is both deep and mutual, that is just as well.

  Would I want any of Jehovah's Witnesses for a friend now? I can truthfully and honestly say no. That doesn't mean I think they are bad people, quite the contrary. It's just that closely associating with any devout Witness means contact with the organization, and that is something I absolutely will have no part of. So that means that a real friendship with a Witness "in good standing" is not possible.

  In the meantime, I am pursuing and cultivating new relationships. That comes rather easily for me, so I am not suffering the pangs of loneliness that have afflicted others who have left the organization. If matters were otherwise, I would resume the Witness friendships I had if that were possible. Those people were among the best friends I ever had and they enriched my life in many ways. But I try not to dwell on what I lost but instead look ahead with joy and confidence. In that way I can be sure that I won't regret my decision to leave or remotely entertain the idea of ever returning to the unfulfilling and unsatisfactory life I had as a Witness.

  Quendi
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  i_drank_the_wine

  No, I don't, because in hingsight they were terrible fuckin losers that I would never associate with unless there was no one else - which WAS the situation I had when I was still believin' what mammy and pappy burned into my brain like a chump!

  In fact, after realizing that my efforts in trying to present facts and truth about "the Truth" and having them ignored, combined with getting kicked to the curb and shunned when I needed friends most... I initially went out of my way to send my old friends everything bad I can get from soup to nuts on the JW's, knowing that it's going to make them stick to it even more. Too dumb to see the truth in front of you? and you want to kick me when I'm down? Ok fine - I will play your game, and thereby be a crazy apostate in order to enforce your faith so that you waste your life lol.
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  only me

  There are a few, but truthfully, I miss them less as time goes on. I don't have many friends at all and I'm okay with that for now. I'm tired after the past few years of trying to keep my marriage tgether and trying to hold everything together for family's sake. I need new friends but it is going to have towait until I catch my breath.