Old saying, "careful what you wish for..."
Old saying, "careful what you wish for..."
I became very depressed because of a severe chronic pain illness. The diagnosis was controversial. I was told they would refuse to treat me unless I held down my job, etc. The pressure mounted. Because it was an orphan illness, I was never told in a straight forward manner about my illness. I shoved all my feelings, esp. fear, deep within myself. Soon, help for depression was recommended. I thought I had to fight the foe. Giving up going alone and seeking help immediately took a great burden off me. I felt klunky and awkward. The bottom line is that I was helped.
thank you everyoneeeeeeee for posting to tell you the truth i didt know i would have gotten so manyy replys. so thank u guys very much for the advice and taking time to write to me.
@ the gladiator its true what you say that we all have bad time and it passes if we are patience. and i am very patience, i always wait it out and then am alrite again. but for some reason i cant bare it anymore when these thoughts come into my mind,i just want to be gone and not live any more, everything just comes back like a constance reminder. and i cant take it any more going through this.
@ bella15 thanks so much...i know everyone is saying i need to go to a doctor, but i just cant ,am very stubborn i guess i dont want someone to actully say you suffer with depression or wateva it is and takes some pills. like i been having these moods for a while it would last a couple days in a month and then after awhile i;ll be ok. but recently whenever it happens i just get more more depress/sad/angry and just want to end it, and i cant take it anymore. like right now am sooo much better than a couple days ago when i felt like crap and just want to die. then i look back and like what is wrong with me am healty strong much better of than most people and am complaining. like i dont know anymore.just like am two diffrent person. by chance have study with any JW?
I understand that you are feeling desperate and alone but I want to share something personal with you...
I took it one step further on August 24, 2007. I made a serious attempt on my life and was in critical condition.
Now, exactly four years and two days later, I can honestly say that I am so very thankful to be alive...
It has been a long road and at first - for even a year or more - in some ways I regretted that I was revived.
But today, I have a wonderful husband - the love of my life - and a gorgeous little boy...
I would have missed out on all of that if I had thrown in the towel.
Please PM me anytime. Don't give up my friend!
hi thanks for sharing and yea thats how i feel alone somtimes,like i knows theres people (specifficaly just 2 people )who genuinely loves me and i feel the same towards them but i love them so much that i rather not tell them what emotions am really feeling inside. i just rather for them not to know, i know that sounds stupid but i love them so much that i dont want them to worry about me.
am happy for :).... thats something i want like i loveee kidss they make me happy cant wait to have my own.... i try to hold on and its always a struggle ...sometimes it just gets the best of me... but thanks julia xoxo
What really helped me was getting a counsellor who I really felt comfortable with. It wasn't so much what he said - but more just being able to open up and talk and feel validated. Honestly, it has made all the difference.
Even now, I still go and see my therapist every so often. Sometimes every other week... sometimes every couple of months. The key is to notice how you're feeling and not let it get too carried away.
Something else that has helped is to make a list of little things that might be bothering me. A lot of times I find that there are 10 little things that are bothering me... BUT, when you put them all together - Geez, that's a whole lot for someone to bear isn't it?
xo Julia xo
hey needhelp . . . nice to hear you feeling better.
i guess i dont want someone to actully say you suffer with depression or wateva it is and takes some pills.
Like some other posters, I got some counselling too. What it taught me, was all I needed to know as to why I was experiencing these things . . . the actual physiological reasons and explanation of what was going on. Knowledge in itself was a great relief. What it taught me was this was nothing to do with my thinking, intelligence, abilities or personality . . . it was simply a physical illness just like any other. Depression is actually a very misleading and poor descriptive label IMO.
The second thing I learned was a few basic coping strategies . . . simple things I could do to mitigate the effects and make life easier. It's been 3 years since I saw a counsellor, and a similar length of time since I've used medication. I'm basically back to normal apart from being more clued up!
Your depressive bouts may be as simple as fluctuating seratonin levels in the brain which effect our mood . . . the thought patterns that follow are a result of that . . . not the cause. If so . . . this can be easily remedied.
Don't be afraid of "labels" . . . or unreasonably stubborn. Get it fixed!
I haven't read the thread (yes, I'm a bad, bad. gurl!) ,,, but want to say, that it's NOT WRONG to pray to die. It means that you are reaching out,,, for help! I have felt that way many times in my life, and speak from experience.
The fact that you have posted here, looking for support, means (to me) that you really want to live,,, grab onto that thought, and remember, no matter how alone you feel,,, you are NOT!
oh, and Size, you have a PM. (private message, for the 'new' ones) ...