Finding peace

by Nickolas 31 Replies latest social relationships

  • alias


    That's just beautiful. Real love is a powerful thing.


  • AnneB

    Very good!

  • AGuest

    I mean this in the most loving and unpatronizing way possible, dear Nick: I am SO proud of you!! BOTH of you!! Because both of you seem to "get" the truth behind the words:

    "What GOD has yoked together, let NO man put apart." Not even the men of the WTBTS and/or their false teachings!

    Even if you don't accept the Source of this truth... that you get the SPIRIT of it is WONDERFUL... and enough for me! You are truly a good man and husband!

    The greatest of love and peace to you BOTH... and may JAH bless!

    Your servant and a slave of Christ,

    SA, who says be sure to take dear Wifey on [a whole lot] more of those long boat trips - LOLOLOL!

  • jamiebowers

    Nic, I am so happy for you and your wife. There's nothing better than a meeting of the minds with someone you love.

    When she finally finally caved in to the idea that his decision could be "right" for him, I brought in the 800-pound gorilla. "But you always always always allow Watchtower to decide things for you. If a man beats his wife, she can divorce but never remarry if he remains celebate. Even if he went to jail, she could not remarry." She hemmed and hawed.

    OTWO, it's such a shame that your wife can't really see the truth about the Watchtower's vile control over people. My jw ex-husband wasn't just beating me...he was strangling me and terrorizing me by driving towards a tree or into oncoming traffic, and then would veer back on course at the very last possible moment. The last few days that we were together he outright told me that he was going to kill me and then kill himself. He was crazy enough that a judge ordered forced committment to a mental institution. Last year I completed the Mosaic exam featured on Oprah that scores the likelihood of domestic violence ending in homicide. My situation scored a 9 out of 10.

    Yet the elders showed up to my home unannounced and uninvited and pressured me into remaining in this marriage. When I refused, they informed me that I would have to prove adultery on his part. They made it seem like those were my only two options; remain in the marriage or stalk the guy who was threatening to kill me. Still a full fledged believer, I was so desperate to make them understand how frightened I was that I said I would da myself before doing either one of those things. Their answer was, "Don't bother. We'll df you instead."

    A few months passed by, and I had moved twice, assuming I was df'd. My jw mom and step-father showed up, again, unannounced and uninvited to ask me if my husband had scriptural grounds for divorce. In that moment I realized that I would never be free of this man unless I "confessed". I had already given up all legal claims to our home, spousal support and all other marital assets, and then my own family was used by him against me. All because that is what the Wathtower dictated.

    And the sad thing is that there are thousands who have suffered even more than I did. All because the Watchtower says so.

  • AGuest

    I gues what they say is true in your case, dear JB (peace to you, dear one!): "What don't kill you... will make you stronger!" Praise JAH and YAY! for YOU... that you are indeed stronger!

    Again, peace to you and may JAH bless!

    A slave of Christ,

    SA, who must hold back from wishing that someone would physically "abuse" some of those WTBTS elders once or twice... so that they can REALLY learn about that "fellow feeling" they're always going on about...

  • Nickolas

    Jehovah's Witnesses are people. People come in different shapes, sizes and temperments. Jehovah's Witnesses represent a subset of the normal population, as much as they think they are special and represent themelves as special they are no different from you and me. There are Jehovah's Witnesses who are evil and there are Jehovah's Witnesses who are just the opposite. Jehovah's Witnesses are guilty of applying lables to non-Jehovah's Witnesses, and non-Jehovah's Witnesses are guilty of the same thing, only in reverse. If you want them to wake up you need to love them unconditionaly. If they don't wake up it will not be because you did not try.

    Good night.

  • still thinking
    still thinking

    Beautiful Nickolas....just beautiful...I'm so glad for you both...

  • leavingwt

    If you want them to wake up you need to love them unconditionaly.

    Steve Hassan agrees with you. He's personally assisted more than 1,000 JWs in leaving the organization. His advice: Love and patience.

    However, as he says, if you're not having meaningful INTERACTIONS with the JW you're trying to rescue, don't expect any results.

  • still thinking
    still thinking

    couldn't agree with you more leavingwt...

    I've been down the rescuing road with my now sober alcoholic partner....rescuing is damaging for the soul. It destroys the rescuer and enables the rescuee to them an excuse. a bull sh*t one....but still an excuse.

    When we have meaningful interactions and are true to orselves and them. And it is coming from a place of CAN conquer all.

  • Pams girl
    Pams girl

    Im happy for you both. You are lucky to have each other. 40 years is a long time to love someone....

    Best wishes to you both.

    Paula x

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