Terry wrote: "Our strongest emotions follow our strongest values. When we say we "love" we are following what we value as the highest possible."
I write: Our strongest values follow our strongest emotions. Either you love or you don't. Otherwise it is a pretend, founded in other motives.
Love is a emotion not a value.
Here is why I disagree:
Emotions are involuntary. Values are voluntary.
The strongest values (evaluations) lead to the strongest involuntary reactions upon encountering the embodiment of those values.
To love somebody or some thing or fear/hate something you must (first) place a very high value on the embodiment.
I'll give you a fine example.
I'm scared to death of spiders. I was bitten by one when I was 5 years old. I went into a coma for three or four days.
One day some friends of mine decided to play a prank on me (as they always did!) by capturing a very large (!) garden spider and wrapping a thread around it and hanging it from a thumb tack in the ceiling.
When I entered my bedroom, there were my friends acting very suspicious! So, I was cautious.
"Hey, Ter....what's that hanging from your ceiling?"
I looked up.
What I "thought" I saw was a fake spider. This was for 2 reasons.
1.It was way big with too bright colors.
2.It was obviously hanging from a fake thread and not a silk one.
I smiled and answered, "Looks like a big spider to me."
The two dropped their big cheesey smiles. "Aren't you scared? We thought you hated spider."
I shrugged, "Naw. Not really."
They looked at each other disappoined and very puzzled.
I got a chair and stood on it to remove the "fake" spider from the ceiling. Cool and calm as can be!
As my neared the spider----IT STARTED TO MOVE!!!
I let out a shriek like a little girl!! I screamed like a slaughtered pig!! Jumping down from the chair I High-tailed it out of my room and halfway down the street before I stopped yelling!
What does this demonstrate?
My mind (voluntary thought) did not place a value of REAL SPIDER on the object. Consequently, my emotions followed the value.
Once the spider moved---the valuation changed and the strongest possible emotion followed fast!