Was there a clique in your congregation?

by Chemical Emotions 29 Replies latest jw friends

  • clarity

    If only they didn't say "we have love amongst ourselves."

    If only they didn't say "you will receive mothers & fathers & brothers & sisters."

    If only they didn't say "they are true friends, sticking closer than a brother."

    But they do say! From their platforms! In their sermons! In their literature!

    Love amongst ourselves, a sign of the TRUE religion.

    The kicker is,........ we believed it!!!!!


  • wobble

    We had a family join our Congo, the wife was known for forming a clique, then moving on to others in her former congo, and forming a new clique.

    What she didn't realise was, our Congo was one big clique, we didn't want people to come and join us, unless they were real party animals, then they were straigt in as clique members. As long as they bought their round, they were O.K

    She had several goes over the years at playing her divide and rule games, didn't work though, maybe she has settled down now, as she has the power she wants, her husband is now head Honcho, I mean Coboe.

  • life is to short
    life is to short

    Every hall I have ever been in. It really hurt, I could never break in, never and I always wondered why. My husband told me to keep my blinders on and think only of serving Jehovah.

    Yet the cliques would all use our car, gas and my husband's time being an elder doing parts and talks they did not want to do while I had to listen to the great fun they all had together after they used us for what they could.

    It just truly hurt to hear about they fun times they had or were going to have while driving them around in service only to know they were going out that night while my husband and I would be home never invited.


  • Momma-Tossed-Me

    Does a bear shiz in the woods?

  • mrsjones5

    Where there are humans there are cliques. It's a problem if you want in and can't get it.

  • life is to short
    life is to short

    Clarity you are so ture I totally believed "we have love amongst ourselves." "they are true friends, sticking closer than a brother."Love amongst ourselves, a sign of the TRUE religion.

    The kicker is,........ we believed it!!!!!

    I hated myself so much I thought of taking my life, I truly did because I just could not understand why I was hated to bad by them.


  • No Room For George
    No Room For George

    In retrospect, (like Mark Twain), I would not want to be a member of any witness clique that would have me as a member.

    The society actually encourages this by teaching people to limit association with other JWs who are not "spiritual" enough - when logic would indicate that it should actually be the other way around - (if the witnesses actually cared about their "weaker" members).

    That's why love is often lacking in congregations, not saying its completely nonexistant, but definately lacking in many cases. Its rough for those who are emotionally and socially self sufficient. I value my privacy and my space too much to be with any in-crowd. Too many phony pretenses based off of unrealistic parameters as dictated by anonymous writers in Walkhill.

    To be fair however, I'm sure any organization, religious or otherwise, will have a fair share of cliques. Prisons have gangs and associates based upon race. Schools have nerds, sluts, jocks, and stoners. After work, the fellas are going to grab a beer and hang out, or the gals are going out for drinks during Happy Hour. Then there's the Bilderberg Group, and Skull & Bones. Cliques are everywhere.

  • Quendi

    I agree that every congregation has cliques because that is simple human nature. As someone else has said, we tend to gravitate toward people with whom we share interests. However, it is one thing to have friends in the congregation, it is quite another to deliberately shut others out. One problem I see in this regard is the great divide that exists between married people and singles. When I lived in the Deep South, that divide was especially pronounced. In many congregations, married couples couldn't tolerate single people, and went out of their way to either exclude them from gatherings and other association or, even worse, tried to "fix them up" with someone in the hopes the couple would eventually marry.

    The WTS doesn't help matters with its distorted view of what family life should be and how singleness is to be enjoyed. For the WTS, single people are cannon fodder to be employed in the full time preaching work or serving in the various Bethel outlets around the world. I am still single, and I remember dreading the talks, meeting parts, book studies, and other things that focused on "family life". District conventions and circuit assemblies were the worst for this.

    When I moved to Colorado, I noticed that married people were more tolerant of singles than the Witnesses I knew in Alabama had been. Still, they tended to associate among themselves more, and single people were often left out. While I never felt hated, I didn't entirely feel wanted, either. I learned that if I were to enjoy my life, I was going to have to be proactive about seeking that joy. The congregation had very limited resources in that respect.


  • blondie
  • Chemical Emotions
    Chemical Emotions

    clarity: EXACTLY! They gather in their little groups and laugh and giggle and make fun and play mean little games with other people's mind's, hurting others, leaving them out, occasionaly "throwing them a bone" when they were being "generous".

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