No memorable talks at assemblies? Sorry to sound cynical!

by punkofnice 21 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • punkofnice

    @Mary - I hang my aposta-head in shame.

    I think as a 'born in' I was always a tad anarchic and thought there was too much worship of the FD$. It sat ill with me for years until I fully woke up. It took being an elder to break the spell because I thought I could really shepherd the flock and help.

    Little did I know it was nothing to do with 'Christian love' but to do with policies, letters, rules and opinions of power trippers..........I resigned and never went back.

    I still can't remember any noteworthy talks from a$$€mb£i€s or the congo though............................even though I gave some! They all seemed the same as noted above.

    God loves you so do more or he will lovingly kill you!

  • Amelia Ashton
    Amelia Ashton

    Until moving to Spain I always believed Jehovah controlled public talks/spiritual food etc., but for some reason his holy spirit was unable to reach us out there on a regular basis.

    Very often there was no public talk on a Sunday because there was no-one available to give it, especially when we went down to just one elder. There were quite a few sisters who would have been more than capable but they were never called upon, even though they volunteered. It did mean that we all got to go to the cafe bar an hour earlier though.

    If a brother was found to be visiting the island they were quite often called on to give the public talk but only if they had suitable attire for going on the platform. Dress was obviously of a higher priority than spiritual food. Jesus sandals not permissable!

    Our calendars and days texts wouldn't arrive til mid June, our years text was mis-spelt and British Kingdom Ministeries were sometimes not relevant for Spain. La Luna's cafe bar early again.

    The best talks were the ones we didn't have.

  • punkofnice

    I have a spare Pubic Balk outline if anyone needs to volunteer for this Sunday. Any takers?

    Do More or Jehovah will Lovingly Kill You. Soon!

    Talk to be assigned to a power tripping bastard or repentant paedophile.

    (5min) God loves you and will lovingly kill you if you don’t do more.

    The world is bad. It is so deadly, terribly bad. Woe to us all. Everything is dreadful. (Quote current news item in proof). The FD$ need power and money because the global financial system is in decline caused by Satan (imply the audience is at fault). The world is in a terrible state. Everything is awful. Give us your cash so that God won’t kill you for being worldly.

    WT 53 6/1 p350 par24. g 69 5/22 p15.

    (10min) Cleansed minds

    Jehovah’s ‘happy pill ‘people are not brainwashed. We prefer to have our minds ‘cleansed’ or God will kill us. God will kill us soon when the overlapping stops very shortly. Rev 1:18. Luke 17:5-10

    WT 53 6/1 p350 par24

    (15min) Encourage more to join the cult or die. Soon!

    Do not use the internet to do independent research. You must recruit more into the cult because the FD$ are losing money. Use ‘Theotwatic warfare’ and lie about disfellowshipping one who leave. Lie to potential Bible studies that Jehovah reads hearts. Do not tell them that only Jehovah’s witnesses will survive Armageddon. WT89 9/1 pg19 par 7

    Armageddon will be soon (subject to overlapping). Paedophiles must be protected at all times but apostates must be hated. Gossip must prevail in the congregations to hurt the feelings of vulnerable ones. 1975 was not a false prediction. Jehovah didn’t let Armageddon come in 1975 as a test to those who thought it would. It was all your fault and the FD$ are not to blame for anything. The FD$ did not say anything about 1975 and you will be disfellowshipped if you say they did because they are your God.

    Only by worshipping the FD$ and giving them money can we have any hope of owning a pet monkey in paradise. Matt 24:45. Prov 4:18

    WT89 9/1 pg19 par 17

    (Please stick closely to the material quoted and do not use the Bible as an authority. Refer ONLY to the washTowel as a higher authority than god. Adhere closely to the timing for each section. Ensure that guilt, fear and phobia are instilled in the audience using ‘loaded language’ at all times. Encourage unquestioning corporate loyalty to the WT$ branded product ‘Jehovah’)

    wtb$ pt 666

  • Jomavrick


    I really enjoyed the line "Owning a Pet Monkey in Paradise"! That is rich

  • Meeting Junkie No More
    Meeting Junkie No More

    Wadda ya mean - no memorable talks? What about the 'SPECIAL' talks? Did you not relish their specialness? Every year a week or two after the Memorial (tm), you'd have one of these SPECIAL special, that nothing comes to mind...

    On a side note, some of the older ones would know how to cover their a**es when asked "How did you like the talk today?" I knew one elderly brother's answer was a stock "So timely". He always covered the bases with that answer!

  • Mary

    Only by worshipping the FD$ and giving them money can we have any hope of owning a pet monkey in paradise.

    God damn it, I wanted a lion!!

  • punkofnice

    @Mary - Perhaps 'New Light' TM will mean you can choose a fuzzy pet of your choice.

  • punkofnice

    Having reviewed threads recently it seems the talks are more interesting to we 'Human mentally diseased gangrenous speaking apostates that the Jehu elders should slaughter(TM)', because we can see the outright propaganda and lies in them.

    To the dubs they're just 'food at the proper time(TM)'......AKA just boring.

  • Phizzy

    I do hope I run in to a JW in the next few days, and I shall ask "What did you learn at the DC this year ?", I think there may be more than a moments silence.

    Give it a day or so, and they will not remember a thing, unless they consulted their notes.

    Food at the proper time it ain't, I can remember good meals I had from years ago, I cannot recall one thing from DC's I attended in over 5 decades.

    What a monumental waste of time, apart from the WT, who make $$$ out of every DC.

  • punkofnice

    Phizzy - I remember driving home from a CONvention and asking the family what 'encouraged(TM)' them.


Share this