You jackasses in Bethel or at the Branch, need to cut me a check.........

by miseryloveselders 69 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  tec

  ((((Misery))))

  I'm with Wasblind. I'm glad you have somewhere to vent, because I don't know what you would do if you had to keep all of this bottled up. This amount of anger is bad for you; eating you up and filling you up until you explode. Fortunately, you explode here... but I second the poster who said you should get a punching bag, or take up boxing if you're passionate for it. Just a real physical exercise and workout could help, though.

  I have a couple of questions for you.

  Do you think you could possibly feel WORSE if you faded and left - or just stopped altogether - than what you feel now?

  I know that you stay (mostly) because of your family. You don't want to disappoint or hurt them, out of love for them, and that is a good thing. But do you think that leaving might be the best thing you could do for them, to show by example that you take a stand against lies and dishonesty... and also giving them a good witness to Christ? How can they choose or even see that path unless someone shows them?

  (Yes, Christ showed them as He showed us all, but they are listening to an organization.)

  Living a lie is tearing you up, as it tends to do to anyone who is honest at heart (and even those who are not, really). And you're young, Misery... you have the rest of your life to do anything you want - that's a lot of time. Set a goal as to when you want to be out of the org. (one that you think you can meet), and then work toward attaining it.

  Tammy
• 

  tec

  Oh yeah, please listen to Sylvia. That is experience talking and it is coming straight from the heart.

  Tammy
• 

  snowbird

  Oh, one other thing.

  Your taking a stand may just embolden someone else to do the same.

  You would be surprised at who is feeling and thinking the same as you.

  I know it won't be easy; it hurt like the dickens to see my little daughter go it alone.

  However, she opted to stay with the JW's. My aim is to be there for her when the Tower comes tumbling down - as surely it shall.

  Please know that this former field hand is praying for you and holding your cyber hand all the way.

  Love.

  Aunt Sylvia
• 

  Curtains

  misery

  tough situation you are in. Start saying NO now. Keep saying NO - it is your friend, your guardian angel. Paste the NO somewhere prominent in your home. Practice saying it in front of a mirror. If it sounds a little harsh and/or if an elderly sis is on the receiving end then practice saying

  I'm so sorry I cannot do this for you now - I hope you find someone else. Don't elaborate - just walk away
• 

  I quit!

  I'm telling you, I kid you not, but my CO will be visiting in a couple months, and I swear I'm going to lay him out on the floor.

  Time to get out of there my friend. I think you are reaching the point where your above statement could come true. Better to just walk away from it all. You are wasting your life trying to please them and no matter what you do they willl always want more. You seem worried about how they will view you if stop playing the role you are playing. Who cares? Who needs them? They'll find some poor schlub to take advantage of once you are gone. You may be surprise how quickly they forget about you. Just get out and get on with your life. The longer you stay the more bitter you will become and eventually (and I think pretty soon) you will blow up. Once you take a stand and leave you will be amazed at the weight that is lifted off of your shoulders.

  Remember that when you leave the Watchtower you are leaving an organization that is corrupt. You are not leaving the people. It is their decision to leave you. If some of them still choose to be friends with you (don't count on it) fine. That would be nice. If not oh well! That is their choice not yours. We all choice our own paths in life. You really need to get on a path that suits you. The one you are on is destroying you.

  Sylvia gave you some very good advice. Please take it!!

  I wish you the best.
• 

  Millions

  You can do one of two things - leave now, or leave later.

  Leave now, and start the process of rebuilding your sanity/confidence/life/personality/opinions/social contacts. This process takes a long time, which is why it needs starting ASAP, but I guarantee you that within minutes of officially leaving you will begin to feel a hell of a lot better, in fact you will be pretty much euphoric.

  Leave later, and nothing changes tomorrow. Same old shit, more and more stress, more time wasted, less time left for living, more members of the congregation encouraged by your very presence instead of being stopped in their tracks and made to ask themselves, "wow, I wonder why they left..."

  Time is a finite resource - for pity's sakes, as someone who KNOWS all the reasons for leaving, stop wasting the precious remaining moments of your life being involved in any way with something so warped and destructive.

  Just do it.

  I really hope you make the right choice soon. Good luck.
• 

  flipper

  MISERY- If it's getting you this pissed off just staying in the cult- maybe you should listen to your heart and intuition and stop attending meetings . It sounds like people are using you ( not just the WT society ) but the local JW's are taking advantage of your kindness. Time to do the old Alice Cooper song " No More Mr. Nice Guy " and make yourself happy so you don't flip out and go insane. Believe me- it got to that point for me in 2003 . I just stopped cold turkey and I've been a lot calmer since 2003. The stress you're under is going to ruin your physical & emotional health in time. Something's gotta give. Just how it appears to me. My 2 cents for what it's worth. Hang in there
• 

  the-illuminator81

  MLE, I want to give you a thought. There never is a good time to quit. You can't wait for the right time to stop, because there never will come a right time to stop. Never.

  Stop waiting. Just stop at the wrong time. Stop now. Now is as good as any.
• 

  Broken Promises

  It sounds like people are using you ( not just the WT society ) but the local JW's are taking advantage of your kindness.

  This is something I had noticed in reading your posts, Miz. You run around for the bros more than any elder I have ever known. You are a kind and caring person, but it sounds that some cong members are taking advantage of your kindness. They are also taking advantage of your singleness, because if you had a wife you wouldn't have the time or energy to be running around after others.

  It is time that you started to stand up for yourself. Saying the first "no" can be hard, but it will be liberating.

  You can't take responsibility for the needs of others. You have to put yourself first. It may be the opposite of what the WTS teaches, but they aren't paying for your car repairs are they?

  Until you start to say "no", you will continue to be used.
• 

  Listener

  I agree whole-heartedly with Broken Promises. You're too kind and the only person that hurts is you, it just gets too much at times. I also think that many in the congregation think single persons are there to be used, not always intentionaly but just that you're there and available.

  I'll go one step further and suggest you learn to say no before you leave, it will empower you and give you a lot more confidence (particularly in learning to deal with rejection) if you do eventually leave. You will also get to know who truelly are your friends and hopefully a bit of consideration returned to you. You have your own needs but you have to learn how to have them met.