How often do disassociated people go back to the organization?

by SEL 25 Replies latest social relationships

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  SEL

  A friend disassociated in order to get divorced, hoping not to get disfellowshipped. Some time later, he has a serious non-JW girlfriend whom he'll probably end up marrying. The thing is, he didn't disassociate because he no longer believed the WT doctrines. I don't know this for sure, but it seems like he would really like it if his girlfriend would understand his religious beliefs and--of course-- maybe adopt them herself, which is not going to happen for her.

  How likely is it that this guy is going to marry this girl, decide to go back to the organization, and then pressure her to convert?
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  pirata

  When I researched the amount disfellowshipped each year, I saw a statement from JR Brown that about 1/2 the number DF'd per year come back...

  Not sure about DA'd. I would think it has a lower return rate than DF'd.
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  nolongerwaiting

  Wow. I didn't know about a half come back pirata. I would have hoped it to be lower.

  NLW's wife
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  freskalynn

  I had a cousin that was dsf'd for about 30yrs. Was married several times and wanted to go back. He found a woman that would accept the JW's belief, then he married her & then she studied & became a witness and he was reinstated. By him marrying her first they couldn't tell her not to be around him. He had it all planned out and it worked out like he wanted. I guess you'd say he worked the system. Ha
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  Amelia Ashton

  In my KH of the 21 that I remember being d'fd only 3 never came back but they may have moved on to different congs. I was only aware of 2 faders, parents of a pioneer and everyone still spoke to them.
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  Amelia Ashton

  I am also aware of a very rich elder who left his wife and kids for a model and got disfellowshipped. The model converted, he was reinstated and is now an elder again. His ex wife never went back. (His daughter was in my cong and she is now disfellowshipped as is her brother). He completely destroyed his original family and none of them fully recovered but he is in fine standing and an elder again!

  I have just remembered another one. Son of the sister I studied with had an affair with a woman at work and got her pregnant. He left his wife (she disassociated herself about 3 years later and hasn't gone back) they got married a couple of years later and she has since converted.
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  Iamallcool

  sel, I do not know, but I personally know two guys disassociated themselves and they are now back in the org now. One guy went to the Army. The another guy committed fornication, he refused to meet with the Judicial Committee and he wrote them a letter of disassocation.
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  wobble

  Difficult to quantify how many DA'd ones return, I should imagine that the ones who DA'd after seeing the falshoods of WT doctrine never return.

  But those who DA'd over lifestyle issues are very likely to return if they are still in thrall to the WT in some way, or fearful of the fiction known as Armaggedon.

  I think it is very likely the guy you mention will do as you say, the lady in question needs warning about this, maybe she can join here ? and then get some lessons on showing him the truth about the WT, then they both can avoid future problems.
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  hardroad

  If he marry's her on a pretext of hoping she'll convert, to me it looks like a devorce in the making, sad that he isn't looking for a relationship with a person really, he's looking to try before he buys before he repents and hopefully converts her. What a sucky thing to do! Doomed I think!
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  undercover

  I've only known of one person who DAd to come back. But he wasn't quite right to begin with. He had his own ideas and had no qualms about sharing them with the friends. And it wasn't in the sense that he had figured out that the JW faith was all a big lie...he thought he had an inside track on "new light". When he kept getting counseled on not dispensing incorrect info or his own ideas, he got mad and DAd. Then the dumbass joined the Mormons. But then they got tired of him and excommunicated him. He then came back to the Hall and eventually got reinstated.