WTS ADVICE FOR YOUNG WOMEN WANTING TO MARRY

by still wondering 33 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • still wondering
    still wondering

    WAIT, SPEAK TO DEBORAH FIRST.

    The upside of this approach is that Deborah “is a real woman and will be able to give you girls’ proper advice”.

    The downside is that you will either need to first find a top rate medium (she’s been dead quite a while) or wait for Rutherford’s god to bring her back from the dead (which Rutherford maintains will happen any day real soon now if not even before the convention ends).

    You will easily recognise her as Rutherford has thoughtfully printed a picture of her in the new and bang up to date “Children” book.

    Unfortunately if you don’t live in the USA you will need to telephone her, which thankfully has recently been invented. Expect to hang on the line a while as she will be very busy playing her Agony Aunt role for so many JWs worldwide all seeking her advice, but Rutherford says that it will be well worth the wait.

  • Meeting Junkie No More
    Meeting Junkie No More

    Man, you just can't make this s#$&* up!

    Just when I think I've heard and seen it all, another humdinger surfaces...thanks for this - those old WTs and Consolations and Zion's Watchtower etc. must be an absolute minefield of 'tidbits' just waiting to be unearthed...thanks for bringing one of the gems to light for our edification! Looking forward to more. Proper nourishment at the right time, my a&&!

  • mamalove
    mamalove

    Shaking my head. Again. For the 1000 time!

  • Heaven
    Heaven

    Is Deborah related to Andre? I think she might be.

  • Listener
    Listener

    It's scarey to think what a real woman was in Rutherford's estimation, sounds like he was a bit infatuated.

  • diana netherton
    diana netherton

    Deborah's photo, please????

  • Perry
    Perry

    "Deborah is a real woman"

    As opposed to all you poor female excuses of women?

    Mental Rape.

  • Listener
    Listener

    Wait a minute. He actually proclaims he knew what she was going to look like. The JW spirits were being poured in gallons back then.

  • GLTirebiter
    GLTirebiter

    From the Watchtower dated 1 Nisan, 1NS (New System):

    Dear brothers and sisters, welcome to the New System! We of the Faithful and Discrete Slave know how many of you have foregone marriage and family relations to dedicate yourself to lifesaving preaching work. For this, you have been awarded the privilege of surviving Armageddon to live in this wonderful New World!

    Many of you have been looking forward to hearing from Barak, Deborah, Daniel, David and Moses and the other ancient worthies about how to choose a good spiritual mate with whom to spend eternity praising Jehovah. But such thoughts are going ahead of the spirit-directed organization. We bring you new light on how we are to live in this New System.

    The holy spirit has revealed to us the meaning of a special passage of the Greek scriptures, written just for this day. In Matthew 22:30, we learn that "at the resurrection men and women do not marry." So not only will there be no more weddings, but all you who were married in the Old System are now scripturally divorced. Never again will lonely single persons be tempted to envy their married brothers and sisters. Isn't it wonderful how we have been given such loving provisions for this new system?

    Let us all take advantage of the short time remaining to concentrate on the theocratic work of stacking cadavers into the bird feeders! There is no time to be slacking off, the end of the Thousand Year Reign will soon be upon us. The annointed overseers--remember, there are no more "elders" in this New System where nobody ever ages--will be giving each of you your assignments, under direction of the New System Governing Body. There is so much to left to do, and so little time, so set aside your picnic baskets and concentrate on Theocratic duties!

  • WTWizard
    WTWizard

    Is this "Deborah" a Bible character? At that, Old Testament?

    If so, it is going to be a LONG time. This religion has been predicting the end since 1872, and still the end is not here. If they have been going in one form or another for 138 years, and in different forms for millennia before that, you have one mighty long wait.

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