another family destroyed by jehovahs happy organization

by Evidently Apostate 26 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Evidently Apostate
    Evidently Apostate

    as i sit down and type this i have realized that if i could have seen into the future and known that this post would need to be created (for my own peace of mind anyway) i know i would have never given the JWs a minute of my time. a little background: i have been a JW for 20 years and found a wonderful woman in the religion she was a pioneer when i met her, an elders girl but that did not matter to me , it was and always has been her compassion and love for people that endeared me to her and we have been happily married for almost my 20 year tenure as a JW. we have several children one of them is a teenage boy. also her sister has 2 girls that have been raised JW and i have grown close to both of them. i learned years ago that JWs can be some of the most pius arrogant people and my wifes parents are on the top of that list. as our children have grown i realize that all of us as parents do not have the authority over our children that we are under in this religion yet some in my wifes family believe that is how you are supposed to be. this has created a big problem with both of my niece's. one made clear to her parents when she turned 18 that she wanted nothing to do with the religion and her goals were a normal life working and dating. the backlash has been an eyeopener to say the least. she has been castigated by her grandparents who condemn her ner lifestyle and although she may no longer be a virgin to give her titles like whore and prostitute are completely wrong. she was kicked from her home and is living in a seedy motel for now which i believe is a clear sign the parents have written her off. her 17 yo sister also wants nothing to do with the religion and has such blow outs with her family she spends almost every weekend at our home which we encourage. she is depressed and on meds, she has overdosed on drugs and had to be taken to the hospital recently. my sil is a wreck and cries a lot and her husband although i believe to be a good man is under the control of my in laws who praise him for his harsh stand. i often wonder how he will feel when in the paridise he is told by his in laws " you made the right choice watching your children's slaughter at armageddon dont worry you will soon forget them". god i hate this awful cult. thankfully my wife has come to see the hatefull side of the JWs and has progressed to being unsure of her beliefs. as we raise our son who sports long hair and plays violent games and he starts to map out his future i am gratefull for the peace we have at home as has no plans to be among the most HAPPY PEOPLE JEHOVAHS WITNESSES. the one word a JW cannot understand that is a must in order to live in peace in this world is TOLERANCE. it has become my epiphany and although i found this myself , this site has given me some understanding as to the length it should be applied,

    thank you

  • Ding
    Ding

    Keep on showing love to your nieces.

    They are fortunate you are there for them.

  • CuriousButterfly
    CuriousButterfly

    EA, what a horrible way to treat family. I completely agree when an organization has that much of a hold on you to shun your family then something is REALLY wrong.

    although she may no longer be a virgin to give her titles like whore and prostitute are completely wrong.

    My heart sank and tears came to my eyes when I read how your in-laws treated their granddaughter and how HER OWN parents allowed and accepted this course of action.

    I truly hope both of your neices can get the professional help they need. They are young and have a full life ahead of them. You are a God send to keep showing love and supporting them. They have no one but you to lean on.

  • goldensky
    goldensky

    Dear Evidently Apostate,

    So sorry to hear about your nieces' situation...! Thank goodness you are giving support to the younger one. I hope your "good" example will help your brother and sister-in-law to wake up some day. Too bad for the control your in-laws have over them.

    I was very glad to read you and your wife are not under their control though and are so tolerant with your son. He definitely has many more chances than his cousins to live a full and satisfying life. All the best to all of you.

  • looloo
    looloo

    that is so sad , keep supporting your neices ,poor girls having bonkers parents x

  • Gayle
    Gayle

    I am so sickened when I hear of the poor JW youth paying the price of this 'loveless' organization. Some rebel, some times going to an extreme, thinking that they will just go out and get crazy to the point of unsafe lifestyles for awhile, since they think they are going to get destroyed anyway. Sometimes those 'tone down' and go back to the organization later because they didn't really re-educate themselves about the facts of the organization. Then, there are many that just go into depression and live that way many years, as long as they don't commit suicide. Either lifestyles are extremely dangerous and saddening.

    Fortunately, you have a moderate, tolerant spirit to demonstrate to your son. I hope you can have ways to open the minds and hearts of your nieces so that they can see they can have a good life with good opportunity and see the positive side of this life. When I was a JW, I knew about, "love your neighbor, as yourself." But really, the organization doesn't let people "love themselves" in good positive ways. The organization just wants people to love the organization at all 100% cost and it damages everyone.

    The JW youth are screaming, externally or internally. They are hurting.

  • Lozhasleft
    Lozhasleft
    i often wonder how he will feel when in the paridise he is told by his in laws " you made the right choice watching your children's slaughter at armageddon dont worry you will soon forget them".

    Erm ...sorry EA ...what paradise ??? and how on earth could it be possible for a loving God to preserve such vindictive people alive if there was?

    Welcome to the forum...enjoy the research...

    Loz x

  • Mary
    Mary
    she has been castigated by her grandparents who condemn her ner lifestyle and although she may no longer be a virgin to give her titles like whore and prostitute are completely wrong.

    Ah, what loving grandparents they sound like. Now if they were reading an article about how some young Catholic girl was called a 'whore' or a 'prostitute' by her grandparents because she wanted to leave the religion, they would be shocked and horrified but of course, those rules don't apply when you're talking about God's Chosen Ones.

    she was kicked from her home and is living in a seedy motel for now which i believe is a clear sign the parents have written her off. her 17 yo sister also wants nothing to do with the religion and has such blow outs with her family she spends almost every weekend at our home which we encourage. she is depressed and on meds, she has overdosed on drugs and had to be taken to the hospital recently. my sil is a wreck and cries a lot and her husband although i believe to be a good man is under the control of my in laws who praise him for his harsh stand.

    Is there any chance the one girl who's living in the motel could stay with you and your wife for a while? Can they get some sort of counselling? I know it's easier said that done, but I'm thinking that if both sisters were at least under the same roof, it might help them both. This religion can and does create A LOT of depression amongst its members because nothing you ever do is good enough for them. With the grandparents being so blatenly judgemental towards their granddaughters, it's no wonder they're in such rough shape. Kudos to you and your wife for what you're doing. You'll find that there are alot of people on this board who are going through something similar, so please keep us posted.

  • Lozhasleft
    Lozhasleft

    Sorry EA I meant to add ...all credit to you for helping the girls...lets hope it shames the rest of the family.

    Loz x

  • wasblind
    wasblind

    I'm particularly concerned for the child living in the seedy motel

    such an enviroment is not safe, Parents need to wake up this

    is the same organization that discards elderly and infirmed bethelites

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