"You're still allowed to visit, but it will be awkward"

by TweetieBird 12 Replies latest jw friends

  • TweetieBird

    That was what my husbands mom told him after she found out that we were no longer going to meetings.

  • Bluegill

    I find it totally amazing that a visit from a son to his mother can be made awkward by the rules of the WTBS. So sad.

  • watersprout

    My Inlaws have said that to my hubby if he is disfellowshipped. They are already shunning him and my daughter and they have always treated me like filth so it really doesn't bother me! lol

    I can't get my head round how a parent can disown their own child, i can't even imagine disowning my daughter. It just goes to show how evil the mind control is.

    I'm soo sorry you are going through this, there are many of us on hear who have either parents or inlaws practicing the oh so loving shunning practice!

  • leavingwt

    He may have to deploy "Reverse Shunning" and let her know that she's allowed to "kiss his butt".

  • TweetieBird

    Fortunately we don't live near them so it's no big deal. We really don't have anything in common with them (his whole family) and the past few visits have been awkward for us anyway. We love them but we are so different now. We have moved on and our life does not revolve around them anymore. All of my kids are out of the cult and that's what really matters to me.

  • jamiebowers

    Well, as bad as it is, there have been much worse reactions. Since you don't live close by, why not keep in touch with emails or letters to let your in-laws now how busy and fulfulling "worldly" life can be?!

  • Bangalore

    This religion is such a family wrecking organization. Maybe they should be tried in court for human rights violations.


  • cantleave

    C - U - L - T !!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • dozy

    "Still allowed" - that is very decent of your husband's parents

    As other posters have mentioned , that is something of a result - some of us have been completely shunned by members of the family even though not DFd or DAd. Why don't you tell them that it will be awkward for your son as well - these situations work both ways. Even if access is permitted to the family , one poster mentioned that all family visits were now difficult and that the the elephant in the room would be a permanent addition to the (increasingly irregular) family get-togethers (and no , I'm not talking about 25 stone Aunty Edith).

    What I don't really understand is how family members feel that this kind of action in any way helps the "errant sheep". When I was fading , the way that family members treated me only served to harden my attitude and validate my negative feelings towards the 'Org. Had I been treated with decency at that time , I might even have stayed a JW.

  • OnTheWayOut

    Tweetie, Watersprout, all others in such terrible situations- strength to you. We hear you.

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