by LostGeneration 33 Replies latest jw friends

  • LostGeneration

    How do you overcome this? I just got done reading ISOCF and toward the end Ray warns against bitterness. I guess I just can't agree with that. I was born into this joke of a religion and it took away everything a normal child should experience. Why shouldnt I be bitter? Its not like I can't function day to day, but when I see this stuff they are spouting about the overlap and how everyone is just lapping it up like liquid chocolate, it pisses me off...Of course I was "one of them" back in 95 and because I was asleep at the switch (brainwashed) I didnt notice a damn thing.

    Then I hear that a couple of teens from my old congo got baptized last week. One is thirteen and one is fourteen. Another (former) friend of mine has a daughter getting dunked later this month. I think she is twelve or thirteen. Personally I consider it criminal how this org brainwashes them into a lifetime commitment when they can't drive, vote, drink, own property....etc....

    Thanks for listening.

  • Scarred for life
    Scarred for life

    I hear you, LostGeneration, loud and clear.

  • garyneal

    Having never been a JW, I guess it was easier for me to not be so bitter towards them in the long run.

    I remember for a few years after leaving an old fundamentalist church how bitter I was towards them. My bitterness to them faded when I met real Christians in college.

  • gubberningbody

    I wouldn't worry about it or avoid it. If you feel bitter, you feel bitter. Feelings are NEVER wrong. What you do is analyse the emotional state so as to understand precisely the elements of the waves of emotion surrounding so as to use that power to your advantage.

    Resisting an emotion is as pointless and self-defeating as trying to outswim a rip current. You relax and swim parallel to the shore until you come out of it.

  • AGuest
    How do you overcome this?

    By clothing YOURSELF with love, dear LG (the greatest of love and peace to you!).

    it took away everything a normal child should experience.

    Are you SURE, dear one? What exactly should a "normal" child experience? I ask because I think there are children the world over who also didn't/don't have such an experience... and it had nothing to do with the WTBTS. Not that I am defending them - I'm just saying, perhaps you should put it into proper perspective. Assuming, that is, that you really don't WANT to be bitter...

    Why shouldnt I be bitter?

    Besides the toll on your own emotions, psyche, health... and the fact that it really is an utter waste of time... with absolutely NO benefit to you? Not enough? How about the fact that while YOU'RE bitter, they most probably aren't even thinking about you? Why would you "give" them that? Haven't you given them enough? Wouldn't it be better for them to see that you are REJOICING that you got OUT??

    Perhaps you will consider trying something they couldn't give you... which is why they are the way they are... and that is love, pity, and compassion? I'm not saying they DESERVE it; I am sure you feel they don't. But is it possible that YOU will be the BETTER person if you do? That YOU can sleep nights knowing that you are NOTHING like them (any longer)... which is reason TO rejoice?

    I mean, I'm just sayin'. Personally, I wouldn't give them a SECOND of bitterness... not one. They don't DESERVE to evoke that kind of response from me. At all.

    Just somethings for you to think about.

    Again, I bid you peace!

    A slave of Christ,



    Shelby is just too dam sweet..

    So I`m Pissed Off for both of us..It makes me feel better..

    ...................... ...OUTLAW

  • AGuest

    I am actually just trying to be truthful (my dear Outlaw - the greatest of love and peace to you, dear one!)... and realistic. EVERY second spent on lamenting these folks is wasted time. There is LIFE to be lived... whatever time one has left... and I just don't SEE giving them another second of misery. Not one more nanosecond. So many of us leave there, only to continue to wallow in misery solely related to and because of them. Don't get me wrong - I DO understand the pain of being separated from and treated despicably by one's own family. BUT... if you're out... and you're gnashing YOUR teeth at THEM... aren't you kinda helping THEM further perpetuate THEIR illusion of persecution?

    Contrary to their propagandic melarkey, they are actually some of the most UNHAPPY, MISERABLE, GRIEVOUS, SPITEFUL... and sometimes even HATEFUL people on the planet. Certainly in this country, if not others. WHY in the WORLD would one want to carry ANY of that away with them when leaving them? Shouldn't we have left that at THEIR doorstep... shook the dust off OUR feet... and beging living our lives as if we really ARE having a ball without that religion? I mean, if you now have the choice... and chance... to dance... why "sit it out"?

    If you say you've left... but you continue to LET them make you bitter, angry, feel hurt, feel worthless (because no one can make you FEEL anything you don't LET them)... then you didn't REALLY leave. Sure, you may have made it outside the gate (i.e., left physically), but you're still hangin' around... emotionally.

    C'mon, dear ones... they TAUGHT us how to do this! They TOLD us that "the world" would "hate" us. They TOLD us that we would be "objects of hatred." They TOLD us that we would be persecuted... and that men would "lyingly say every sort of thing about us." They just didn't tell us that THEY were that "world"... and those "men." But is there ANY question that they are... really? My neighbors, co-workers, non-JW family/friends... don't hate me. They don't treat me poorly. They don't shun me. They don't speak ill of me to others. They don't persecute me.

    If you were in that organization for any amount of time... you were taught to be prepared for this, for their ill-treatment of you. They TOLD us it would happen. All we need to do is ACCEPT the TRUTH... that it was themselves that they were speaking of. Hard pill to swallow, but ALL of the evidence points to that truth.

    Again, I bid you... and all here... peace, dear Outlaw!

    YOUR servant, friend, and a slave of Christ


  • LostGeneration

    Thank you scarred, Gary, and gubberning.

    Shelby, I dont WANT to be bitter, I just am. Like gubbering said, feelings are feelings, they are hard to change from the logical view. I know its a waste of time, so thus I want to rid myself of the feeling. It probably is more of a time thing than logically deciding not to be bitter. I try to take the 'good' that came from my JW experience and not always dwell on the bad. Thanks for the kind words, you have given me some things to think about in trying to truly put it all behind me.

    I certainly havent been hurt to the extent that others have, so I am thankful I escaped without too many scars. But on the other hand I think of these kids getting dunked right now in their early teens and what is going to happen to them down the road if/when they figure it out and lose their families.

    I am amazed though at people like Ray who gave them everything, his whole life -blood, sweat and tears, and yet was able to speak in such kind ways in his books about the men that did that to him.

  • blondie

    After 47 years associated with the WTS, I could let bitterness take over. In the end it only hurts yourself. I'm so glad I finally woke up and now I'm out. I don't want the remaining years of my life to be bitter. I try to do positive things to help others leave if that's what they want. I also grew up with a pedophile father and an alcoholic mother, I could let that make me bitter. But I'm so happy they no longer have a part in my life and that I can heal and have healed and enjoy life with those I love and who love me.

    Love, Blondie

  • thenoblelodge

    Hi, I don't think it matters if you get baptized or not. If you inherit this religion and leave because you come to a conscious decision that it's not for you, for whatever reason, then your treated just the same. The majority view it that if you have been taught from a child up, then you are answerable to Jehovah.

    They will shun there own shadow if they have to.

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