Hmmmm What to do?

by cantleave 6 Replies latest jw friends

  • cantleave

    Our old congregation secretary, who I is a really great guy - a true gent, keeps inviting the family round to his house. It is a gorgeous day here, and he has a really inviting pool.

    The trouble is, however much we like him and his family, if I go we know to go will compromise our, to date successsful, rapid fade.

    I keep fobbing him off but I am now sounding very lame in responses.

    Any Ideas?......

  • Mickey mouse
    Mickey mouse

    Say you've got athletes foot? Verrucas?

  • sweet pea
    sweet pea

    Don't go. There's no point. You can't have an honest relationship with these people anymore.

    Keep up with "sorry, we've got other plans", pretty soon the invites will stop.

    Find some new friends who have a pool .

  • mrsjones5

    My parents live less that 5 minutes up the highway. They have a really nice pool and I live in an apartment without a pool. Do I take my kids over to my parents to swim? No, because my husband is not welcome in the house, not because of anything he's done but because they hate him and look for an opportunity to rub it in my face.

    We have very nice public pools in this town.

  • Mad Sweeney
    Mad Sweeney

    There are some people in my old congregation that I'd still go visit if they would lower themselves to invite me. Not many, but some.

    I would think attending a meeting would be much worse than attending someone's home.

    Is it a big get-together or are they just inviting you and your wife? How does she feel about going? It might not be that big a deal if you can manage to draw the line at social conversation and refuse to entertain any religious discussion.

    Just curious, and I'm sorry if you've already explained this and I forgot, but why are you fading rather than just leaving? Family still in the Borg?

  • cantleave

    Thanks for the comments.

    In the end I went, mainly because my son REALLY wanted to go and play in pool and it would have hard on him not to go. It was just me and my son, their son, one of thier grandsons (my son's friend), and pioneer from another congregation (a friend of thier son). Nugget and my daughter didn't go as my daughter is rehearsing for a show.

    Most of the conversation revolved around cars (he's just bought a used Boxster and I have bought a used E class Merc - so we compared notes for about 40 mins). We drank some beers and TBH it was quite enjoyable.

    There was very little talk of JW issues and no questions asked about my complete non attendance since March, it was the elephant in the room syndrome. I stayed 1 1/2 and made my excuses.

    I suspect as the CO is due soon, and he is offcialy my group overseer, he can honestly say he has made an effort to understand my situation.

  • sweet pea
    sweet pea

    well you didn't tell me he had a used Boxster . . . that changes everything!

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