Here is how unjust, cruel and life-altering DFing can be. I got baptized at 16 and, though I lived a clean, loyal, dedicated, moral, good life, doing all the right things as a JW, reached out and had a fine reputation and many friends (both in and out of the Truth), this is what happened to me. I was very careful to marry a JW woman that I could and did fall in love with to spend the rest of my life with or into the New System, whichever came first LOL and we were so happy together for 7 years, building a life, home and friends…then one day…...
SHE decided…”I don’t love you anymore, I want to get on with my life”, went to the elders, told them I was unfaithful (UNTRUE) and proceeded to sell the house, cash in, leave and go 800 miles away to her family and old friends. Just that simple.
So, here I am having NEVER done anything wrong and honestly thinking that as long as I did everything right (which I did) I could and would never get DFed. I had up to this point always thought that only “bad people” and “sinners” could get DFed. In her home town 800 miles away she then proceeds to drag my name through the mud accusing me of everything from being unfaithful to being gay with most JWs and family believing every word.
I in-turn proceeded to rebuild my devastated life only to find out that, though I had done NOTHING wrong and was still the “good person” I am, I would be DFed if I were to fall in love again and marry another woman. So, I was expected to suddenly remove from my body, mind and soul the natural healthy male feelings for a wife and home, live alone and celibate for the rest of my life and the comfort I was given was at least she is blood guilty for MY ULTIMATE DEATH! should I remarry. The other choice given me was to become a stalker, hid in the bushes in her home town, and loose tons of time, money and self respect in doing so (never mind my job and jail time for stalking!) in the hope of catching her “in the ACT”. And folks, the elders (and JWs) really want “8 X 10 glosses” of the sex act.
What a way to have to think and live the rest of my life! The other choice I had was of course to “ignore the rules”, live as a normal healthy human, get married and then be kicked out of my religion (DFed) with its accompanying slander, loss of all my family and friends. And this, after having already lost my wife’s family/friends. Some choice, huh!
So, please tell this mind-game twist in life and impossible standard to meet to all those young folks contemplating baptism!