Friends are dying ... too much to bear.

by compound complex 14 Replies latest social entertainment

  • Lozhasleft
    Lozhasleft

    Grief is a terrible thing and sadly must run its course...the outpouring of it over Ray's death is astounding and I have a feeling it will make a difference ...not sure how or why ...its just a feeling...

    Loz x

  • Dagney
    Dagney

    Dear Coco,

    About a year ago, the mentor of my life passed away. I could not get a hold of myself. I was weepy for months, melancholy...sad, thinking so much about how he influenced me in so many ways. I couldn't believe how sad I was for so long.

    Then sweet pea from the board here said something that changed my life. She said, "how lucky you were to have had him in your life. You should be grateful you got to have him at all." Duh! I was thinking about the loss more than what I had received. I changed my perspective, and that almost immediately changed everything. When my mom passed away last December, and another really great friend/neighbor two months ago, I focused on the good from the relationships rather than the losses, and it helped tremendously. It is still very sad, the loss, the end of a relationship through death. But focusing on what I did have rather than what I didn't really helped me.

    Sending you comfort and peace dear Coco.

  • compound complex
    compound complex

    But focusing on what I did have rather than what I didn't really helped me.

    - Dagney

    That about says it all!

    Thanks again, everyone, for sharing. It really helps.

    Having a good signal at a time like this sure would help, too.

    Love,

    CoCo

  • flipper
    flipper

    CoCo- It truly is a sad time for all of us who , although may not have known Ray personally - yet we FEEL like we knew him because he gave us everything he had to give of what he was as a person - his heartfelt love, compassion, caring, and honestly giving us access to information , we very ell may not have heard about otherwise in such a public way.

    Having lost some very dear friends in the past myself - you asked " How do we cope " ? Well- I try thinking about the positive impact people like Ray and other dear friends had in my life. A little piece of them and Ray will go on inside each one of us as we learn from them and carry on with the valuable life's lessons they taught us . How to be a genuine, caring, compassionate human being and to show deep love to others - as NONE of us ever knows if we may be here tomorrow or not. So for me - I take those things with me after losing loved ones and ask myself the question " How can I be a better person in my life from what they taught me ? "

    Viewing these deaths in this manner- always helps me carry on. Sending my love to you CoCo. Hang in there dear friend. Sincerely, Mr. Flipper

  • compound complex
    compound complex

    Dear Syl, Scarred, PSac, Straight, Cage, OUTLAW, Baba, Dagney and Mr. Flipper:

    As usual, trying to say as much as possible before the signal dies ...

    Thanks so much again, and for the latest words of encouragement [Mr. Flipper - great thoughts there!].

    If, in my haste, I left someone out, please accept my apologies.

    Love,

    CoCo

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