My mom's love for me is based on well I am doing 'spiritually'---

by QuestioningEverything 19 Replies latest jw friends

  • QuestioningEverything
    QuestioningEverything

    This is the comment that my husband made to me this morning about his mom. I felt terrible for him. She is an UBER-JW!!! His childhood was very JW structured. It still affects him to this day-- it's hard to let go of things that were put in your head for over 30 years.

    I don't know what to say to take away his sadness about this.

  • cantleave
    cantleave

    My mum is like that - I really hate this conditional love. It even seems to extend to her grandchildren, last summer she told them they must love Jehovah more than their parents!!!!!

  • miseryloveselders
    miseryloveselders

    My mother is on that same nonsense. She told me quite frankly, if I ever leave Jehovah, she's through with me. I said to myself, no pressure huh.

  • Mad Sweeney
    Mad Sweeney

    Thank God my parents are reasonable people. They feel they're too old to DA themselves (all their friends are Dubs) but know all about my situation and are supportive of it. I'm sorry for those of you with judgmental Dub parents.

  • leavingwt
    leavingwt

    Many of us are all too familiar with this. Never give up hope. They may one day have an awakening. In the meantime, perhaps meaningful steps can be taken to eliminate opportunities for his mom to victimize him emotionally.

  • spawn
    spawn

    Cantleave

    Don't take this personal like but your mother is MENTAL and don't deny it.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • out4good3
    out4good3

    The only people I know that are beholding to that nonsense are related only to me by marriage. They are all on my wife's side. My family hates the WT whore-ganization with a purple passion. so, if they said anything to me like that I wouldn't give a rat's ass.

    As a matter of fact, if my wife every said as much out loud, as much as I love her, she might get her ass kicked to the curb as well.

  • QuestioningEverything
    QuestioningEverything

    Thanks for the replies. My husband is a very good man! He is a very hard worker and provides well for us financially. He is loyal to me and his boys. He's handsome . I work full-time too and he helps with the cooking and cleaning. He is a very good role model for our boys and positively involved in all aspects of their lives-school, sports, etc... I'm grateful to have him as my husband.

    It hurts my heart that his mom puts all of this second to his 'spirituality'. He and I are faders and NEVER will return.

    PS. Thanks for letting me brag about him.

  • truthseekeriam
    truthseekeriam

    Boy do I know how you feel:(

    Just give him extra love and tell him all the wonderful things you told us about him. They love hearing it.

  • Open mind
    Open mind

    Sounds like my Mom and his Mom are buddies.

    During a typical 20-30 minute conversation with my Mom she will give me "updates" on a least 4 or 5 JWs from her area. Their "spiritual" status is ALWAYS the first and usually only item that is mentioned. "He's was just appointed as an elder." or "She's still pioneering."

    Conversely, if I inquire about anyone who has done well for themselves in other "non-spiritual" areas, it's like pulling teeth to get the information out of her. JWs in her area have gotten college degrees, started successful businesses, taken really interesting trips around the world, etc and unless I pry it out of her, she'll never mention this stuff because, in her mind at least, it's just so much trash.

    Oh and, thanks for bragging up your hubby. Sounds like a keeper.

    om

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