How honest should I be with a JW on Facebook? (page 3)

Quillsky

Sad about deleting your sisters on Facebook, ana_dote.

Surely your family is more important than the cult?

you would think....I personally feel that family IS more important than this cult....but my sisters don't quite see things from my perspective. If they were to see my new group of "worldly" friends and see how "worldly" I myself was acting (according to JW standards anyway), it would surely make things worse than they already are. I actually deleted them to preserve peace, if that makes any sense.

But...it doesn't matter a whole lot anyway....my oldest sister and I never have been close and hardly talk...and although she hasn't directly condemned my choice to leave, she hasn't exactly kept up with expressing her desire for me to come visit her and her husband like she had been doing before I made my decision.

And my other sister...well...she's just a complete hypocrite anyway. Her husband left the JW's many years ago and she continues happily married to him (even allowing him to bring the association of his df'd mother and worldly sisters into their home), but when I informed her of my decision to leave (which I felt obligated to do on various levels and also because she started prying into my personal life and asking too many questions)...she accused me of now being a dangerous influence to both her and her 3 children and expressed the desire to associate with me much less. I used to spend the night at her house several times a year and try to keep in touch as much as possible, but now I haven't seen her since our last (worldly) family reunion in October, which was awkard at best...and while I have tried to send her text messages letting her know I'm thinking of her and missing her and love her and the kids (I even recently sent her a text wishing her a happy anniversary), she NEVER responds. So basically she has passively cut me off without just coming out and saying it in that blunt of a manner.

So quite frankly, if they are going to pretend like I'm some bad person, then no....I don't want them on my facebook site so that they can use it as ammunition for their unfair judgements.

Purza

I have about 5 JW friends on FB who I consider "on the fringe". I created a list for "dubs" and anytime I post something I don't want them to see, I customize my status so those individuals can't see what I am saying, or if I post a holiday(ish) picture, I block them from seeing. So far it has worked well for me. One friend did delete me and when I asked her why, she replied "you just seem so happy not serving Jehovah and I need to surround myself with people that love him." Ohkay - good riddance. Hahaha

Purza

John Doe

Honesty is a virtue. The opposite is a lack of virtue. I find your post inappropriately judgmental.

Quillsky

Honesty is a virtue, I agree. I didn't "should I be dishonest?", I said how honest should I be? In other words, should I go as far as saying "I'm not adding you because you are a current JW"?

she replied "you just seem so happy not serving Jehovah and I need to surround myself with people that love him."

Oh, that's good.

mrsjones5

I have old jw friends and family members on facebook who know that I'm not a jw. Just yesterday a jw made a friend request. I don't know this person but she's a friend of one of my cousins and a jw who is my friend. I'm not comfortable accepting this person's friend request.

primitivegenius

yeah first things first you got to ask yourself what do you have to lose. if your 100% faded then there is that, when she sees something that she can rat you out to the elders over then what if she does. there goes your fade.

also depends on if you have jw family and being dfed would be an issue for you or not. i added my cult memeber sister after she requested it, and a few months later i posted something on her wall and then i saw it up so i am positive it posted, and then another jw commented on my post...... miraculously my post disappeared from her wall completely. should have unfriended her right then, but i gave her benefit of the doubt and only just finally unfriended her.

most people will err on the side of caution regarding jws as friends, but you got to look at the worst case senerio and if it could get you dfed, can you live with that. and whats the point of being on fb if you have to censor yourself because of jws as friends.

im faded but my parents know i go to another church and am NOT a jw so they have little or no contact with me. so for me it wouldnt matter cause they aint got any power over me whatsoever.

Quillsky

Okay, I bit the bullet and added her, and another JW. They are good people. Let's see what happens.

How honest should I be with a JW on Facebook?

Share this