JW Dictionary

by thinker 47 Replies latest jw friends

  • thinker
    thinker

    WARNING !
    The following "dictionary" may be very discomforting to true believers of Jehovah's Organization. Read at your own risk.

    I have noticed a number of "catch phrases" used by JW's. I believe the purpose of these phrases is to stop all further thought and discussion. The purpose of this "dictionary" is to explore the meaning of those phrases in an honest way.

    JW Dictionary

    "Jehovah's Perfect Organization": A separate mythical entity. This organization is not made up of the millions of men and women in it. Jehovah's perfect organization can therefore be perfect while the various parts of the organization are imperfect.

    "Imperfect man" A way to explain: 1. Past mistakes in teachings. 2. Current injustices by brothers and sisters, elders, C.O's, etc. ... The imperfection of the men and women who make up the organization does not in any way reduce the perfection of Jehovah's organization.

    "Mediator": Jehovah's mediator on earth is the WTBTS. You as an individual need a mediator to understand and obey Jehovah's wishes. The imperfect men, who act as Jehovah's mediator; dispense "the truth" through Jehovah's perfect organization (remember it is separate from the imperfect men).

    "The Truth": The truth is whatever the WTBTS is teaching TODAY. The truth of the past was true then, but not now. Today's truths come from Jehovah's perfect organization and must therefore be followed exactly. Yesterday's old truths are the fault of "imperfect men" or "Jehovahs' test of loyalty and faith", tomorrow's truth is anybody's guess.

    "Old Light, Abandoned practices, test of loyalty or faith": When old truths are not true anymore the WTBTS has to explain it somehow. (Oh yeah, don't forget imperfect men. But the organization made up of those men is still perfect). Note: ( If other faiths have old light, abandoned practices and tests of loyalty or faith, it is called false prophecy and teachings). If you ask too many questions about these things you are told " Jehovah will make it all clear in time." (shut up and do as you're told). If you REALLY PERSIST with your questions you may be called (gasp!) and Independent Thinker.

    "Independent Thinker": Anyone who doesn't readily accept the Watchtower's "Spiritual Food" without question. Also associated with "Pride": Thinking you can be saved without the help of Jehovah's perfect organization (made up of imperfect men, just like yourself).

    "New Light": See truth and old light.

    "Bad Association": An Independent Thinker who can't keep his mouth shut.

    "Stumble your brother": Saying anything not in 100% agreement with the WTBTS. (You have doubts?! Hell, WE ALL DO! Just don't talk about them; ignore them and they will go away or "Jehovah will make it clear in time.") If you talk about doubts and "stumble your brother", the whole perfect organization -made up of imperfect men who have doubts just like you- might fall apart.

    "I don't worship men, I worship Jehovah": Is it my fault Jehovah sends his messages through the GB, CO's, and elders? I don't worship them; I only accept their "spiritual food" without "independent thought" (wouldn't want to "stumble my brother or sister"). They are "mediators" of "Jehovah's perfect organization" (a mythical thing separate from the "Imperfect Men" who make up that organization). Sure, they taught some weird things in the past, but that is just "old light", "abandoned practices", a "test of loyalty and faith". This is "new light"; the "truth" as taught by Jehovah's perfect organization (or is that imperfect men?) Well, o.k. I'm a little confused about where the truth is coming from, but I'm sure "Jehovah will make it clear in time"; I just hope He tells the GB and not me, because I can't talk about anything that differs from Watchtower teaching; if I did, I'd get kicked out and lose all my friends and family.

    My apologies if I've offended anyone by pointing out the truth of these comforting phrases.

    thinker

    Edited by - thinker on 31 December 2000 9:22:11

  • larc
    larc

    Thinking,

    I like your thinking. A couple of days ago, I was thinking along similiar lines, must be inspiration. I came up with some definitions from A to Z. Hope you like them.

    Apostate - someone who knows the history of my religion.

    Babtized - someone who can stop thinking.

    Congregation - people who will never see the new world because they are more imperfect than I am.

    Demonized - someone who beats me at an arguement at their doorstep.

    Elders - electricains who make good psychotherapists.

    Freindship - what you show to those who meet their quota.

    God - the deity who can only be reached indirectly as in "through Jesus Christ our Lord and the Watchtower Society".

    Hell - a place I'm living in right now.

    I - Never use the "I" word - you need to be humbled.

    Jesus - the perfect man who died for our sins, but is just an after thought today.

    Kingdom Hall - an awe inspiring building that gives a spiritual feeling.

    Love - What I show you if you obey all the rules.

    Mother - someone to disfellowship, if she starts acting a little strange.

    Nanosecond - How long it takes me to change my mind, once I read the new Watchtower.

    Open Mindness - What the householder should have, but something I shouldn't.

    Pioneering - a carreer path leading to povery.

    Questioning - an obscene word.

    Responsibility - the only thing in my life - no time to go fishing.

    Sex - something that should be done only after a long prayer.

    Tact - lying.

    United States - King of the North, although it's due west of the King of the South.

    Virgin - a woman who has never been french kissed.

    Why - a forbidden word.

    "X" - many bad words xmas, xjw,
    x rated, rotated x is a cross.

    Youth - something that is mispent pioneering (actually this is an apostate definition)

    Zoo - a place I've been living all my life.

  • mommy
    mommy

    EEKS! I am blushing now that I wrote out those 5 stages on another post:)
    You have gone to great lengths to provide this and I LOVE IT!!
    I left the truth when I was 18 (see I still called it the truth) those catch phrases really get you don't they?
    Or maybe we have all been brainwashed and thats why they are stuck there:)
    Eons ago I remember an article in W or A that asked if we had an open mind. Do you remember? Well I never read it didnt even open it up why? I was never aloud to have an open mind! I was spoon fed from infancy. As I look back at some of the things I was taught, I can see why they say hindsight is 20/20.
    Unfortunately so many people waste the precious life we have been given, pursuing the JW "Final Destination"
    Think of the families torn apart, Hearts broken, lives lost so they can live forever in paradise:)
    Anyway thanx thinker I always enjoy you and your wives posts:)
    mommy

  • mommy
    mommy

    LARC I am lol that was great I missed it while I was posting my post:)
    mommy

  • Simon
    Simon

    I remember the open mind article...it was the start of the "we're not a cult" campaign.
    It struck me even then that what they wanted other people to do ie. question their beliefs was something that we weren't prepared to do ourselves.
    When I was little (must've been about 9 or 10) I asked an elder 'how do we know that WE have the right religion?' (I must have been the sort of child that you want to hit...). Hi reply was 'could all the millions of JWs be wrong?'. I nodded wisely while thinking "there are more millions who DO think we're wrong". Still, after all this time they cant come up with any more convincing argument!

  • Simon
    Simon

    BTW: thinker & lark - great posts !
    I'm going to have to add some sort of post rating so that we can make sure the best posts don't get lost over time.

  • RedhorseWoman
    RedhorseWoman

    These are great!

  • ZazuWitts
    ZazuWitts

    Thinker - thank you - great idea and it
    can even be ongoing as you/others think up new ones.

    And, larc, my dear husband, I'm quite impressed w/ your A to Z. Thought I'd
    praise you here 'cause if I complimented you in person I'd have to watch your head get bigger and bigger - not a pretty sight. Hey honey, you are right, it's kinda of fun getting a little sarcastic.

  • thinker
    thinker

    Thanks larc and Simon.

    Thinker

  • thinker
    thinker

    I'm just so proud of my husband. I think my head is lolling off to the side.
    Thinkers Wife

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