I told my husband that I'm going to throw away my no blood card

by doublelife 19 Replies latest jw friends

  • doublelife

    I discussed my view with him and he understood the point I made but said that until he receives further instruction from the GB he will still refuse a transfusion. I asked him if he would deny me a blood transfusion if I needed one and he said, "I don't know." I didn't say anything after that. I went to lunch with my non-jw aunt and cousin and told them about the conversation. My aunt said to use her as an emergency contact and I asked her if she would be willing to be my medical power of attorney and she said yes. She said that she likes my husband but I am her niece and if this is my decision that she will fight him if needed. So now I have to go through the process of making her my power of attorney and I'm not really sure how to go to about it. I don't have a primary care physician so I know I need to do that. Do I contact a lawyer? Is there a certain type of lawyer I should contact or will any one do?

    My aunt also talked about how her mom was so upset when my mom decided to marry into a jw family. Their worst fear was that they would never see my mom again and it came true. I had no idea how much my absense and my mom and brother's absense affected the family. They said it was like a loss as if my mother was dead. She also told me that they would buy christmas presents for me and my brother and they would get in trouble for it and wouldn't be allowed to give it to us. I had no idea that happened. It was upsetting for my aunt to remember all of this and was holding back tears. It made me upset.

    The way my aunt talked about my mom and the way she expressed her mom's view made me realize that my mom gave me a completely different perception of that side of my family. My mom always gave me the impression that she was always the black sheep of the family and she thinks that her mom doesn't really love her and always liked her sister better. It makes me wonder if that is really true or if that is the distorted reality my mom sees as a result of being in a cult. From my discussions with my mom it doesn't seem like she has any positive memories of her pre-cult life. I know Steven Hassan talked about that in his book but I didn't realize until today that maybe that's what happened with my mom.

    Well, during lunch, my mom called and I answered. I let it slip that I was eating with her sister and my cousin. Immediately, my cousin and aunt cringed and whispered to each other, "Oh no. We're going to be in so much trouble." And, sure enough, the first question my mom asked is, "Did you go to the meeting today?" So I got out of it by saying our meeting is on Saturdays. And it is, I just never told my mom. After I got off the phone I spent the rest of the day with them and we went to the movies. My aunt thought maybe we could invite my mom but it was rated R and I had to tell them that she wouldn't see it because of its rating. My mom called me about 6 times and I just knew I was in trouble so I didn't answer. I waited til I got home to call her and I was surprised that she didn't get onto me. She actually seemed a little jealous. She said, "I just wondered what triggered this meeting between ya'll because they never call me." It's weird because she is the one who pushed them away but she thinks they are the ones who don't like her. So I'm thinking that the three of us should start doing more stuff with my mom. Maybe my mom needs some association my her non-jw sister.

  • wha happened?
    wha happened?

    I should probably do the same

  • Farkel

    If you would send the WTS to hell, you wouldn't have to worry about the crap and burdens they heap upon you.


  • agonus

    Liberty can indeed be intoxicating but the price you will likely pay will sober you up fast.

  • finallysomepride

    Good one, mine was cut up and burnt years ago, felt really good.

    Life's precious

  • teel

    Good for you, my wife did quite the opposite. She told me to cut her out of the blood card, because she would never witness for me in an emergency. Great darling, don't worry about it So my card lies buried deep in a drawer, and I have her word (without even asking for it) that she won't do anything.

  • cantleave

    I don't have a no blood card anymore. I am thinking of donating.

  • blondie

    Do they have "blood cards" any more? I thought they were called health care power of attorneys now, were valid for more than a year unless you moved to another state, and were more detailed in medical choices. I would get a generic health care power of attorney (not a WTS form), fill it out and file a copy with your doctor, clinic file, and hospital as well with 2 agents.


    Remember these are meant to cover health issues more than blood transfusions. If you don't have one on file, in many states, your spouse can make the legal decisions.

  • doublelife

    Thanks blondie. And yes, they don't have the no blood cards anymore but I never filled out the power of attorney so all this time all I had was the old card. I didn't fill out the power of attorney because the fractions issue was too confusing for me. The confusion prevented me from being able to make a decision. Everything is so much clearer now.

  • Slayerbard

    Yeah right now I'm getting hounded to fill out the DPA card I haven't done it yet and have no intentions of doing so.. I honestly don't like the phrase "direct power of attorney". If they ask me to I'm telling them right now I'm going to have my lawyer look it over before I sign it. see what the reaction is. lol

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