Sex before marriage (page 3)

skeeter1

I think seriel sex before marraige is wrong. Sex is like velcro, it's the glue that really cements a special relationship. The biggest problem is that it complicates the relationship, making it harder to let go and break up. Then, the next time you have sex in a new relationship....it isn't as special as the first (or previous) relationships. The "bond" of the Velcro loses it's stregnth. Plus, when you are finally with your soul mate, you feel "silly" when you think of your past "loves."

Call me old fashioned, but I see value in not "giving it freely" away.

But, I also see alot of terrible marraiges within the JWs, all caused by the "no sex" (including masterbation) before marraige and pent up frustration

Skeeter

VoidEater

I think it is better to have some experience with sex prior to marriage. You will want to know something about what you like and what your partner might like prior to making a commitment in marriage. More importantly, you need to talk about sex with your potential mate to determine if you have the same expectations and desires about sex - what it is supposed to mean, how frequently it should be engaged in, what you might be willing to try in the future, and the like.

It is sad to be "trapped" in a marriage where you are not sexually compatible with your mate. That only leads to trouble.

stillajwexelder

I was not a JW before I Got married -but I did have sex beofrre marriage

flipper

VOIDEATER- I agree with you on " it's sad to be trapped in a marriage where you are not sexually compatible with your mate. " I was married to a JW lady for 19 years . It was miserable when I wanted sex , yet she thought sex was dirty because of having been abused as a young teenager. So I got the fallout from that. My wife now has no such problems and things are great.

But back to the topic- YES INDEED ! It IS a necessary thing to have sex before marriage to see if you and your mate would be compatible in this regard. It can bring a lot of misery if one mate wants oral, and the other doesn't - or one person is prudish and the other is quite liberal and open minded about exploring their sexuality in a relationship. So sex is the closest intimacy a man and woman can experience so before signing marriage papers I would say it's DEFINITELY important to know that person intimately

KingDavidwasframed

Just remember!! Its not pre-marital sex if you never plan on getting married

Magwitch

There is no sex after marriage - it might as well be before

Quillsky

The word "mate".... it's interesting that a few have used it here. It's Jehovah's Witness jargon. IMO it's rooted in the 50s mindset of the Governing Body.

If you really don't understand what I mean, try using the word "mate" to describe your husband or wife next time you get together with normal people.... sorry I mean non Jehovah's Witnesses.

LittleSister

Magwitch believe me you can still have an active sex life when you’re married.

What really puts a dampener on things is when you have children.

PSacramento

What really puts a dampener on things is when you have children.

Indeed !

Before the kids my wife and I used to have the "lazy loving" afternoons and such, but with kids, No way !

It took a bit but she has mastered the 10 min orgasam !!

LOL !!

Me? well, part of my martial arts training is in taoist MA and "jing retention" is part of that training, so I am only allowed to climax every 14 days so, while she gets to enjoy a few quickies during the day, I have learned to enjoy NOT "finishing", LMAO !!

Its funny, during onepart of my MA training years ago I couldn't "finish" for 100 days !
She had a great time out of that, LOL !

cantleave

part of my martial arts training is in taoist MA and "jing retention" is part of that training

Well there's a reason not to do Martial Arts - it ruins the Marital Arts.

Sex before marriage

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