How Did You Know The One You're With Was "The One" ?

by palmtree67 29 Replies latest jw friends

  • palmtree67

    I'm feeling all warm and fuzzy, love-y and romantic because of my upcoming marriage, so I ask you all:

    Was there something that happened to prove to you that your spouse or mate was "the one"?

    My man gave up his longest and best friend. They had had an intimate relationship at one time and she wouldn't stop dirty texting and e-mailing him, in spite of us both asking her repeatedly to stop. She tried to sneak some in behind my back, but I found out. Long story, short: He told her to not text or e-mail him at all anymore. If he had chosen her over me, I'm not sure I'd be marrying him.

  • minimus

    If he's marrying you, he shouldn't want to read his "best friend" texting him dirty stuff.

  • palmtree67

    He didn't want to. That's why he asked her repeatedly to stop. I had no problem with her being in his life and being his best friend since they were 13 years old. But when I came into his life, there needed to be some boundaries on her behaviour and she refused to abide by the boundaries he asked for.

    So he kicked her to the curb. I acknowledge that was a hard thing for him to do and I appreciate that he blames her for the loss of the friendship and not me.

  • beksbks

    He bought milk and filled the gas tank without being asked

  • palmtree67

    Thank you, beks!

    I agree it's sometimes the littlest things that show mutual respect and love in a realtionship.

    My man is the ONLY man who has ever cooked a meal for me. And every weekend, he makes me a perfect over-easy egg for breakfast. I fall in love with him again every Saturday morning because of the egg!

  • minimus

    PT, you've got a principled man.

  • BabaYaga

    I'm going to love this thread! I'm looking forward to all the responses.

    I don't know how I knew, but there was absolutely no doubt in my mind.

    There is one funny little incident that sticks in my mind: My little cat (who was so shy no one ever saw her) climbed up onto his lap and totally relaxed... as if he had been there and she had known and loved him forever. It was pretty validating to know that she felt it, too.

  • LittleSister

    It's a cliché, but I just knew my husband was the one when we met, which I found a bit scary at the time.

    My mum calls it our Celtic intuition, but he would say it had more to do with me wearing a very short black skirt.

    All the best for your upcoming wedding hope you can get in as many pagan traditions as possible.

    "Something old, something new, something borrowed and something blue"

  • palmtree67

    Hi Baba-dear!

    Sweet story! I think animals are better judges of character than some people are sometimes.

    If there's lots of responses here, maybe we'll all get some good and practical ideas for keeping our relationships "fresh"!!!

    Little Sis: My man says he fell in love with me the first time he met me, too. It's weird how that happens with some couples. Weird, but really nice!!

  • daniel-p

    Everyone answers this differently. I didn't necessarily "know" she was "the one," but realized her personal characteristics were golden. It happened quickly... we were engaged two months after we met, and married a few months after that. It's been going on 8 years now and it seems like only a couple.

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