Frustrated with the JW in law sitch

by bluesapphire 31 Replies latest social humour

  • bluesapphire
    bluesapphire

    So my husband rarely talks to his sister and never talks to his mom. His sister, brother in law and mom will have nothing to do with me because 10 years ago when I left the JWs they heard rummors (gossip) that I was apostate.

    Husband is totally apostate too by their standards but they ignore what they don't want to see. He celebrates all the holidays, goes to Church, celebrates birthdays and bad mouths the WTS all the time.

    Well sister in law calls this morning and he is on the phone with her for one hour. They talked non important stuff, just catching up. I was laying in bed the whole time and listening to the conversation. They brought up long lost relatives, their grandparents who are dead, their weird mom, their dad, their cousins .... but neither one of them brought me up. My husband asked how her husband was but she didn't ask how I was.

    After a while I started to get offended. I didn't care that she did not care to bring me up but I was like WTF toward my husband. Like he couldn't mention me in any conversation???? He started talking even about their cousin's husband losing his job. But my name was taboo!

    So when he got off the phone we got into a huge argument. I was so hurt and offended that he participates in this shit. Like he could have said a little something about what we do that is not offensive to them. But he is WEAK!

    I lost so much respect for him this morning. Just seeing the way he cow-tows to these a$$holes! Just venting here. Input is welcome.

  • jamiebowers
    jamiebowers

    Maybe he's just trying to avoid hearing something hurtful said about you.

  • bluesapphire
    bluesapphire

    Yeah, that's exactly what he said. He didn't want to risk having to defend me. BUT!!! When has ne EVER defended me to them????

    It just seems to me that he is WEAK. Maybe I'll get over it by tomorrow. But today I am totally TURNED OFF by him. I don't even want to be around him.

  • yesidid
    yesidid

    I often have conversations with my side of the family and not talk about my husband, and they all get along.

    If my husband had a conversation with one of his siblings and I was not mentioned it would not be unusual and I would not be offended.

    That's what siblings do.

    y

  • bluesapphire
    bluesapphire

    But this was a conversation with his sister whom he has not talked to since at least last November!!! Who talks to someone after all that time and not mention their significant other? He asked about her husband. It's not like me with my sisters where we talk all the time. It's a conversation after a long long time of no word from each other. It's normal to ask after all that time about his wife. He even admitted he felt uncomfortable and tried to see if she would bring me up when he asked about her husband. But she didn't and that is why I feel he is weak.

    There was something he did a while back where two of my family members were so mad that they wanted nothing to do with him. And HE DID SOMETHING BAD. They had reason to feel that way. But I held my ground and said, "He is my husband. I'm sticking with him." And they got over it and now we are all united again.

    Here I did nothing wrong and he can't stand by me????

  • HappyGuy
    HappyGuy

    No one can talk to me for five minutes without me talking about my wife. I could care less if someone might get "offended" because I was talking about my lovely wife. And no she doesn't read this web site so I am not trying to earn points here or get out of the dog house. Besides, my wife said she doesn't believe in putting her husband IN the dog house, she prefers to bury him under the dog house and provide a little tube for air if he's good.

  • bluesapphire
    bluesapphire

    LOL @ Happy Guy. You are getting the picture.

    No one can talk to me either without me bringing up my husband, my daughters, our son.... It's MY life. If they want to talk to me and not hear about my life, then they don't care about ME.

    So this is exactly what offended me!

    I like the dog house idea but I'd rather throw him under a bus right now.

  • HappyGuy
    HappyGuy

    Another thinng my wife will say (she's 25 and smoking HOT) is "Mr. XXXX, you don't plan on EVER seeing Mrs. XXXX naked again, do you"?

  • JAFO
    JAFO
    Yeah, that's exactly what he said. He didn't want to risk having to defend me. BUT!!! When has ne EVER defended me to them????

    ??? He's your husband.. it's his job to defend you..

  • WuzLovesDubs
    WuzLovesDubs

    Oh I get this....last year this time my father in law ripped me a new one over a CHRISTMAS CARD I sent via email. FIL was offended that I didnt print out, sign and send via regular mail a PERSONAL copy of that newsletter but instead just included him in a "mass mailing". ???? But he didnt say it to ME he said all this stuff to my HUSBAND his SON. But did my husband defend me???? Or tell his father he was OUT OF LINE? Oh hell no he didnt. He told his father that I "was not as evil as he thought I was" and said he agreed that "writing a newsletter to people was just selfishness" and he too was tired of "having Christmas jammed down his throat" every year. AND...said husband sent me the letter and told me to CALL HIS FATHER AND APOLOGIZE to him! I was like WHAT THE FUCK??? are you CRAZY???? Yep...it was immediately after that incident that I decided it was time for me to go.

    So yeah...I get how you feel.

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