Most congs I've been in have one. Current one doesn't seem to, that I can tell. Never know behind the scenes, though.
Did you Have One " Power Controlling " Elder in your Congregations ?
by flipper 21 Replies latest jw friends
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cantleave
Flipper you analysis is correct. The COBE of my congregation is a despotic, nepotistic, controlling, lieing, arrogant arse8le, he reinforced to me that Elder arrangement is not spirit directed and even though there are some genuine, loving caring shepherds, they are given very little voice, and this was one of the key reasons for my exit.
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no more kool aid
I've never been in a congregation where there wasn't one. He constantly vies for the position of PO, service overseer or secretary so he can have more control. The others are usually afraid of him or just tired. They all go along in the name of unity.
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Bourne
"Good... your hate has made you powerful. Now fulfill your destiny and take your father's place at my side!"
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Farkel
flipper,
My sister's elder husband is loving called the "Nazi" in his Congregation.
One thing you didn't mention is the fact that when the elder arrangement was implement in 1972 or 1973, the Vatican (thanks Anthanasius! I'm gonna use that one!) also announced that all elders were equals, and specifically that COs were just elders like the ones in the Congregation. Well, THAT didn't last long. Too many elder bodies started putting renegade COs in their place and I guess they complained to Mother about it. Not long afterwards, that policy was dropped. In fact, dubs were told specifically that "COs are NOT just regular elders."
When equality, love and respect for each other creeps into the WT organization from time-to-time, it soon becomes apparent to the Vatican that CONTROL is lost, and they obviously prefer the latter over the former.
Farkel
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wobble
We had some interesting clashes on our BOE from the seventies until the Congo. split and I left.
There were two factions basically, joined by blood and marriage on both sides, both factions contained an Elder who wanted to control the whole thing, it caused many along elders meeting that got nowhere, it never occurred to them that the Holy Spirit should be consulted, not that He would have been interested in guiding these guys anyway.
One of the control freaks even went to the other nazis home and threatened him !
You have to laugh !
Love
Wobble
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flipper
Good comments ! Thanks !
BALSAM- Sounds like you had a real arrogant elder there. There were thousands more all over the planet just like him, and still are unfortunately.
GAYLE- That is awful that this elder made you and your partner feel guilty about having a congregation picnic playing baseball ! I started seeing this in the early 1980's where large gatherings started being discouraged as people may fornicate or drink too much. I think due to people at Bethel getting together reading Bible's on their own - it freaked out the GB and they started getting way too controlling and forbidding ANY congregation to have large picnics. As you know from being at Bethel- the same controlling tendencies reamained there as well put out by the governing body.
LANCELINK- Why doesn't your experience surprise me ? I've heard this story so many times it's disgusting. Some brother moves into a new congregation, befriends the P.O., goes into business with him and wha-la ! He's automatically appointed elder ! Go figure. And oh yes, it's usually the ones who are pedophiles trying to pick up on teenage sisters too. Disgusting.
BABA YAGA- So you had a " Godfather " elder in your congregation, eh ? I think everybody did.
FARKEL- Sorry to hear your elder brother in law is a Nazi elder. Jesus. But from the very top of the WT society down into the elders, like you say power and control is what they mainly seek and want over rank and file members.
WOBBLE- It is incredible how many blod relatives controlled elder bodies at congregations ! It was always such a power struggle among so many elders ! Peace out, Mr. Flipper
BOURNE- Very true. I think ALL elders epitomize Darth Vader and are JUST as evil !
EMTYINSIDE- It's one reason I never reached out for elder position. You mentioning the power struggles between the P.O. and other elders. It wouldn't surprise me at all that some of them came to blows hitting one another. I've seen it almost come to that among elders.
ATHANASIUS- That's amazing to me that the power tripping elder tried to interfere on a JC meeting which he wasn't even involved in. Figures. If he had connections as you said he thought he'd get his way ALL the time. Sounds like he mostly did. I'm glad you saw through the B.S. and eventually got out and escaped ! Good for you.
CRAPOLA- Sounds like you were dealing with a pompous, arrogant a-hole with the elder dealing with your daughter. Calling himself Jehovah ? I'd say he had an image problem. Good lord.
FINALLYSOMEPRIDE- I'm sure you had some controlling elders - you just weren't made aware of it.
MAD SWEENEY- I also noticed most congregations have power tripping elders.
CANTLEAVE- The lack of love and giving out their own personal counsel on things unjustly led me to leaving the organization also, like you. They were so smug, arrogant, and self assuming that it sickened me to even know some of these elders.
NO MORE KOOL AID- Exactly. It seems every congregation had elders vying for control and power. It's really disgusting.
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OnTheWayOut
The cong. that I belonged to when I was baptized had a totally meek, mild P.O.. It turned out that one brother was very much the controller that wanted the power. The other elders were smart enough not to let him be the P.O. as he would be a bit out of control. So he ran the congregation through the puppet-P.O. instead. Men he studied with were the up-and-coming Ministerial Servants. I was one of those men. He gained control by showing the P.O. how their families and friends need never really get into trouble if the two of them just handle matters themselves without forming a committee. It was a "loose" way of following the instructions for elders but it was certainly selective.
Fast forward about 6 or 7 years- a few of his "studies" are now elders and we are supposed to be his equal. But whenever we voted on something or made a decision that didn't go his way, he tried to talk about how much more experience he had, how we should really think about doing things his way. I think he was ready to blow a gasket because we voted our own consciences instead of automatically listening to him. He must have thought that we were all "his people."
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DrJohnStMark
In the city I lived in, there were four JW congregations in the 80's, and they all had a different flavor... or smell in sunday morning meetings. In one gongregation the presiding oveseer, a wealthy business man whose authority was never questioned, was known to drink quite a bit... and so did most of the ministerial servants. Then there was one "dry congregation" in the city, because the controlling elder in that congregation was a teetotaler... towards the end of my JW career would not have lasted a minute therein. In the first congregation it was possible to keep your privileges even if you had quite a few quite often if you happened to be a fishing friend of the presiding guy. During the years, I learned that several families moved in another part of the city to join a more happy congregation.
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flipper
OTWO- Wow. It really is scary to see that elders exist in conregations that control things so much like the one elder that you mentioned. What's the expression ? " Power corrupts , absolute power corrupts absolutely " . It's exceedingly dangerous when you get a man in there who wants to bring in his own people and effect and control every aspect of people's lives just for the sake of control. In actuality those type of elders become slave owners over rank and file witnesses - without each member even knowing. Sick.
DRJOHNSTMARK- I noticed as well that each congregation would many times take on the personality of dominant elders who controlled power. If the elders liked to drink , so would the ministerial servants. If the main " power elder " was ultra conservative ; the MS 's would be too as the congregation. So people in the congregations become sheeple not of Jesus Christ- but of egotistical powermongering men who put forth their own ideas to control the congregations. I saw this so many times in my 44 years as a witness - I count even count how much
