"not a good example"

by LoriJis 27 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Billy the Ex-Bethelite
    Billy the Ex-Bethelite

    {whispering} psst, IronHill, just don't mention to the elders that everyone on this Internet apostate forum things they have turds for brains.

  • jamiebowers

    Any chance Ironhill's brother and fiance would forego a kh wedding and have it elsewhere?

  • flipper

    LORIJiS - I think you need to understand that your husband is probably very hurt emotionally by not being allowed to be in his only brothers wedding. It makes total sense for him to not understand this idiocy. I was in the witnesses for 44 years- and I STILL don't understand it. Well- yes I do- it's called " cult mind control" total control by the WT society over EVERY aspect of people's lives. Your husband sees the injustice and how wrong it is. Perhaps you would do well to understand the injustice done to him as well. He needs your support emotionally - not judging whether he's right or not to be puzzled. Of course he's puzzled.

    I experienced this myself because I was inactive , not going to meetings - I was not allowed by my daughters or sons in law to walk my 2 daughters down the aisle as their father. Do you know how much resentment towards the elders and the idiot WT arrangement I have for that intrusion of what I could have shared with my daughters ? And yet I quietly sat in a dignified manner at both weddings not causing a scene so my daughters could enjoy the happiness of their special day. So think about what I just wrote you . If your children did that to you as a mother when they married - would it make you just a wee bit angry ? I think I know your answer. So try understanding your husbands hurt and anger. There is nothing moral or just about the Jehovah's Witness cult. They are dangerous to all family unity

  • wantstoleave

    Babygirl, Similar happened in my area recently. A couple got married, and she had her sister as matron of honour. She is unbaptised, definitely not a witness, hadn't been to any meetings in years...yet she was in the wedding AT the hall! Yet, another couple couldn't have their friend in their wedding because she was inactive. At least you still get to go....that's a plus. Lots of weddings here, if you're inactive, aren't allowed to use the KH. So if you marry somewhere else, say in a garden somewhere, brothers and sisters are discouraged from attending because you are inactive. So very sad.

  • freddo

    JW Weddings are a minefield. And I think they are tightening control from the top down and weedy elders lockstep obey!

    It wasn't long ago that an inactive bro. could be a best man in my neck of the woods and an unbelieving father could certainly walk his daughter down the aisle or "give her away".


  • LoriJis

    I would liket o thank all of you for your words. Unfortunately we are just going to have to deal with this because his brother and fiancee are fixed on having the wedding at the hall. I spoke to my husband last night and he said "it is what it is". It's a shame things have to go down this way but i appreciate all the advise.

    Thanks again

  • undercover
    I spoke to my husband last night and he said "it is what it is".

    In typical guy fashion this means..."I'm hurt but I'm not going to express my feelings or talk about it. I'll deal with it internally". For me, I'd just prefer my wife to express understanding and then drop the matter until, or if, I bring it up again.

    Good luck...

  • LoriJis


    You are so right. He does feel that way. I guess from one guy to another you would know huh.

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