by SnakesInTheTower 36 Replies latest jw friends
But why is it that Black Sheep and others can toss around insults like these, "a member of a crazy doomsday cult would be a complement".
So why is it worth big drama if a JW calls someone "worldly", whereas it is totally OK to call JWs crazy, cultish, bastards, idiots etc.?
Yet, she doesn't want me to take the nuclear option (ie, writing a DA letter)..doesn't consider it to be necessary. I hope you are showing her your/our posts. Complete honesty is very important.
I agree with Toni on this point. It isn't necessary. You don't have to fulfull the desires of the victims of the cult you have left. You have a new life with with a wonderful lady. Live it.
I hope that Toni is reading your posts. You may have made a few posts in the past that you would rather she didn't see. So what! She needs to know what she is getting in to as much as you do and it will help her to see your growth out of the cult. I see it all as positive and I wish you two all the best for your future.
Is Toni a member here yet? She should be. She should be asking us all of the questions she doesn't want to ask you.
Cheers
Chris
I am glad you are honest with her. She appreciates it I am sure. Talking it over, even if it took a few hours, lets you understand each other better and know how each other feels.
The conversation let you see how her heart feels and how much it hurts her. She is able to see things with an eye that we don't have. It is enlightening to see an unindoctrined reaction to things that we were used to. This post itself, helps me see what an insult it is to use those terms. I know it is used as a descriptive term in JW land, but I never thought about it from the standpoint of one who isn't in the cult and is the recipient of the term. Astounding. Tell her thank you for helping and teaching us! And thank you Snakes for sharing this. It is enlightening to read your posts and think about ourselves in situations you find yourself in.
Keep talking, keep loving, keep sharing! You will grow closer and closer. All the best!
Crazy, isn't it?
When I was in, I never used "worldly" to refer to non-JW's.
I hate labelling people.
Sylvia
You should have called her Sister Nosy, Snakes. Most encouragement is really just a fishing expedition. Actually, I think it's good that Toni knows what you are dealing with. It is a life-changing string of events when you leave the religion. Two years ago could you picture yourself with a wonderful non-Dub woman?
It is pretty obvious that those cockroaches (yes, I will start insulting the witlesses right back) want to bust your relationship up. There is nothing they would like more than to see her walk right out of your life forever, on account of something they said or did. At that point, they want you to go back to being a full time witless (despite that you haven't been to a boasting session in 2 years), and go back to being a hounder again. And, since you have been through the Value Destroyer Training School once, they would want to set you up with any number of assignments.
Now, why are they against an inactive person marrying a "worldly" person? (And I am defining a worldly person as a regular person, without any derogatory meaning--unlike the witlesses, who define worldly people as people that are wicked and vile). Unless they want to get something out of you--I would suggest using this incident in your disassociation letter and telling them that, since they are not going to let you live in peace (and will ruin your relationship if they get half a chance), you have chosen your partner instead of the Filthful and Disgraceful Slavebugger and the organization of witlesses that they control.
I wonder what would happen if I were to call them in the middle of a boasting session and start calling them cockroaches and witlesses.
dinah:
Two years ago could you picture yourself with a wonderful non-Dub woman?
uh no. I did know her 3 years ago, but even 4 months ago when we started officially dating, we could not have imagined we would travel down this path so far so fast. We talked about that last night. We are also very comfortable with it. Toni is a better person than I could have ever imagined. Whd why the hell she puts up with me and the residuals of Dubworld I do not know...she is a very kind person...but she does have another side that says she tolerates no bs. Good.
kw:
This post itself, helps me see what an insult it is to use those terms.
which is why I posted the story.
black sheep:
Is Toni a member here yet? She should be. She should be asking us all of the questions she doesn't want to ask you.
She is not a member here yet, and she is welcome to read my posting history, esp the last 4 months, if she chooses. And yeah, some of what I have posted would make me uncomfortable if she read it.
Neither of us have a lot of time to be on here (or anywhere on the net). I have some extra time on my hands right now because a) I am done with school and b) my job is slow this week because our client is going through a computer billing system transition. I don't like working without proper support.
OH:
So why is it worth big drama if a JW calls someone "worldly", whereas it is totally OK to call JWs crazy, cultish, bastards, idiots etc.?
absolutely point taken. I do mess around with JW terms (gibbering buddy, wacktower, etc.) and do not hesitate to fire at the GB themselves. Individual JWs I try to not call crazy strictly based on being a dub.
sweetface...and considering that not only was I a brainwashed dub, but I was an elder to boot. Being judgemental and an ass came with the job description. It is also why I struggled with being a dub from around 95 until I left in 07. I did not beat to the same drum as many dubs. Nonetheless, I was as bad as some but not as bad as others. I can only apologize to those I hurt and move on. Your point is spot on, as is purps.
Now...gotta run, Toni just called..I am meeting her at work for lunch..
Snakes ( Rich)
There was a KM a few years ago saying that using derogatory terms like "worldly" was not appropriate.
I think I was the only dub who paid attention during that meeting because very few seem to remember that article.
Snakes..
Your relationship with Miss Niave.....Is.....Niave..LOL!!..
Toni is`nt going to put up with another woman..Encouraging you not to marry Toni..
LOL!!..
Your going to have to get rid of your Bevy of Beauties and concentrate on Toni..
..........................
Zeal knows no decorum or good taste.
