I had to make a decision

by journey-on 51 Replies latest jw friends

  • bluecanary
    bluecanary

    Pleasure talking with you about it, Spike

  • Spike Tassel
    Spike Tassel

    I look forward to seeing more from you, blue. I like your attitude so far

  • caliber
    caliber

    Spike Tassel's heart is true..let no one miss that

  • Spike Tassel
    Spike Tassel

    thanks, caliber, your support here and on other threads is helpful

  • Hope4Others
    Hope4Others

    I left 10 years ago, but I would say I felt tormented lots. I always worried about the What ifs.....

    It was not till I started to read the experiences of abuse here on the forum and doctrinal issues for myself with things

    my husband said that I truly questioned my whole life being a jw. When finally I started to order books I began

    to realize what a cult it was. The last book I read last February 2008 was Steve Hassans "Combatting cult mind control" since then

    I have not had to read anything else. My mind and soul are now at peace and ease....

    h4o

  • cantleave
    cantleave

    darkl1ght3r you have mail

  • sooner7nc
    sooner7nc

    On Tuesday 7/28/2009 I mailed a letter to the BOE of my local congregation. I had originally wrote another letter a few months ago, it was even posted on a JWNers' blog, but never did send it for my own personal reasons. Well, I did send this one.

    To: The Body of Elders of the M****** W**** congregation

    This is to inform you that I no longer wish to be associated with your group. I do not now claim to be a member of your “religion”, nor have I for quite some time. The myriad reasons why, are mine and mine alone, and none of your business.

    Don’t come to my house or work. I do not wish to speak with any of you.

    Don’t contact my wife. She’s doesn’t attend your congregation, so leave her alone.

    You may contact me by phone at 940-***-**** to confirm this letter.

    Thank You

    Mike *******

    I'm waiting now for all the crap to hit the fan. I feel better about it now, but was extremely stressed out in the days leading up to sending it. It was a difficult decision to come to, but I'm glad I did.

    sooner7nc Mike

  • bluecanary
    bluecanary

    I hope whatever reaction you do or do not get isn't too stressful for you Mike. I empathize with emotions being less intense once you finally get it on paper. I just wrote a letter to my best friend, telling her my reasons for leaving the JWs. I don't mind if she chooses to stick with them and never speak to me again. I just hope she will read it before she makes that choice. And I really wish I could see her reaction when she gets it. Unfortunately, I may never know.

  • Hopscotch
    Hopscotch

    My husband and I faded for about 2 to 2 1/2 years still believing (looking back now we see is wasn't belief but just after effects of 40 years of mind control) that JWs had the truth, at least doctrinly. We did have huge doubts about the organization as far as the hypocrisy and lack of love was concerned, and my husband had been disgusted by many things he saw during his time as an elder. It was very hard during those couple of years as we often felt guilty (though that decreased over the months) and a bit fearful. It was like living in no mans land. We had no one but each other to discuss our feelings with as our families were all very zealous JWs.

    Then at the beginning of last year we started to do some serious thinking about the things we had been taught as JWs. I started writing out various beliefs one by one then looked at the logic behind them. We saw that they were all totally flawed and illogical. After doing this for about 6 months we came to the conclusion that what we had been taught as JWs was lies. The blinkers then started really falling off and we decided we were never going to return.

    After making this decision we felt free to look at 'apostate' sites on the internet. We were astounded by what we read. We had never heard of the UN debacle before. We lurked on here for a long time and read story after story that was similar to ours. It was such a relief to know that we weren't the only ones who felt the way we did about JWs. We bought Ray Franz's books and read them. What an eye opener all of this was. We wondered how we could have been so duped for 40 years.

    In January this year after an ultimatum from my father, we told my family we were never going back to JWs. My family has totally shunned us since then. We have never been df'd and have not da'd. But we feel at peace now, and are so happy to be free of the fear and guilt that you live with constantly as a JW. The freedom to live life the way you want to is fantastic.

    Hopscotch

  • journey-on
    journey-on

    Hopscotch.....so glad you and your husband had each other through all this. It's not easy to make the decision to leave, but it helps when both of you go through the process together. Sounds like you did everything logically and methodically and the conclusions you came to were not done lightly. I'm happy for your freedom, but sorry your family has decided to shun you. I am only partially shunned.

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