I also do not believe in the Trinity.
In my opinion, the whole demeanor of Jesus before and after his death was one of worship of his Father and never a claim to equality. Sure both sides have their "proof texts" but a reading of everything Jesus said and did does not reflect a Trinity but a Father/Son relationship. A father and son may have the same qualities and the same responsibilities but if we are to hold true to the terms "father" and "son" (and not add to their obvious meaning) a son is always younger than the father. A son's existence is dependent on the father's existence. If the father does not exist neither will the son. But the father's existence does not depend on his son's existence.
Was the Son always called the Son? In the Trinitarian doctrine was God the Son always the Son? Before all creation in the eternal past God the Father spoke to God the Son and God the Holy Spirit spoke to them both, one Godhead in three persons. Three individual "I AM's" in one Godhead. Each with three different functions and responsibilities, but all one. All co-eternal. The Christian church made models of the Trinitarian Godhead in order to facilitate understanding of this concept. A necessary help not an idol of course.
Yet the Jews were forbidden to make an image of God even as a help for their understanding of him. The Jews did not need to make a model of God to help them understand God. He made himself plain to them. He was their God. He was One. Unlike the other nations of their time who worshipped various gods the Jews worshipped one God. No model of him was to be made in order to worship him and no model was needed in order to understand him. He made himself known to them. He was not a mystery to them.
Yet, the Trinitarian Godhead is a mystery and has had models made of it in order to help make plain the concept. Is it just a coincidence that the Trinitarian Godhead concept came into being when gentiles (whose national and religious heritage were not based on the worship of the God of the Jews like the Apostles and early Christians had been) were in charge of doctrine? Religious philosophy was the preferred church candy after the early disciples had died off and what better candy to write about than a mystery and what better mystery could there be than God himself?
Jesus' love and humility and godship were written about and elevated in these philosophical religious works of the early church which for the most part only served to elevate the writers of those works. Men loving men who write volumes but who live lives that do not reflect the very things they write about. Millions of words written to explain what Jesus said in a few. Jesus apparently failed his disciples. He did not speak enough, he did not supply the required wordy philosophies and insights that were needed to understand him and his teachings. He fell short.
