by truthseeker 17 Replies latest jw friends
Did your congregation have any so-called dynasties, or "a succession of rulers who belong to the same family for generations"?
My last congregation had a family who had or seemed to have complete control over most aspects of congregation operations. They like to run the show and make it obvious that they are in charge.
Then there are those who receive unearned privileges because their father is an elder who fast tracked his son to eldership.
there was a family that had a father who
stepped down when his daughter was DF'd
but whose son was appointed, and his other
sister married a guy who was a cousin/nephew
to another family and he was an MS headed to
appointment and HIS cousinfrom the other
side of his family moved to that KH, married into another
family whose father had been an elder and his
oldest son was an MS....
then there was an elder whose
son in law was appointed and
the SIL's son was an MS ( i am
sure headed to appointment)....
the levels of convolution are disturbing!
Chickpea, that is way too detailed family information for us poor men to keep striaght.
I've attended a few different halls and there always seemed to be that one family in each one who liked to control things. I started to look for the controlling family when we would visit a new hall. My husband would give the PT, so we got to visit frequently.
Most of the time, one could pick them out by the end of the meeting. One controlling elder would handle the WT regurgitation and kept making jokes out loud about him and his wife. Wifey would raise her hand and banter back. Some would laugh. I felt nauseated.
This elder's son was made an elder and then PO at a ridiculously young age. There was no way I would have discussed anything personal with a kid that had such limited experience in life.
Oh ya ....
Time and again I have seen the nepotism in action.
Here's one way it works. Family heads in control of the congregation make sure that their impressionable children are publically praised and featured as often as possible in demonstrations, planned comments, assembly parts, etc. Kids love the attention.
As time goes by they are given as many priveleges as possible ... microphones, parking attendants etc. The hook is that as long as the offspring "obey their parents" and keep climbing the ladder, they are given outside benefits like clothes, cars, and mad money. If they don't coform, the "hassel' begins. Adolecents go along with that program ...
Next, Elders make certain that fledgelings are entirely dependent upon the family and recieve no prepartion for the real world. Now they are trapped .... hooked on attention, recieving benefits, and totally dependant. Add to that a decent-looking "spiritual" female to replace Mom and breed the next generation and you have the makings of a dynasty. and if Dad has enough money to help the newlyweds buy a house, the deal is almost aleays permanently sealed.The sad part is that those in the congregation without such sponsorship are ignored and forgotten ...
Oh yeah. The PO of my former congregation employed some of the other elders and ministerial servants, until some of them went out and got other jobs. Talk about your conflict of interest!
I always thought he ran the congregation like he did his business, which was rather ruthlessly, as he was a millionaire (he downplayed that quite a bit, and always made sure people knew he donated quite a bit of his bucks to "Kingdom Interests").
But, he was always really proud that all 4 of his children were active Witnesses, and also quite materially successful. Unlike most JWs, he sent his kids to college. He wanted them to have good jobs and actually looked down on Witnesses who didn't want higher education! But, that was because he had one...he had a PhD in something, very unusual for a Witness.
I always thought of him and his wife as the President and First Lady of that congregation. LOL
Here's one way it works. Family heads in control of the congregation make sure that their impressionable children are publically praised and featured as often as possible in demonstrations, planned comments, assembly parts, etc. Kids love the attention.
In all fairness, have you considered how difficult is is to find people who will allow themselves to be publicly praised? I was asked to do this a few times (and I was by no means a stellar example, or even a good one), and I turned it down every time but once. It's not a pleasant situation. Is it any wonder elders are more able to sucker their own kids into doing it?
Interesting experiences....
The elder in my old hall is operations chief, does the sound, is on the committee, his sons are following in his footsteps. Nothing wrong in itself.
When they stopped the rotation system of elders being given different jobs, you can see how the process works. An elder gets used to doing one job all the time and then it becomes a part of life, he protects it, that is his position and woe betide those who might covet it.
Some halls definitely have the "good ole boy network", it's all about who you know.
I was aware of control freaks but no dynasties. Nothing beyond father and son.
I grew up in the suburbs.
We had one Sister a "Joan Collins" type called Alexsis.....she was a total bitch!
