gays in your congregation...?

Albert Einstein

According statistics, there should be in every congregation about 4 gays.

My experience is, that some decided to live a "normal" life and get married and you hardly noticed them.

But there are some types, who, from how they speak and behave, are absolutely obvious gays. Did you have them in your congo? How did your congregation treat them?

In my KH we had two brothers like that ... Both single all their life, both wonderful people, both were elders, the younger one (35) was a nice guy, on the begining was chased after by single sisters, but later on they gave up...

I was wondering how they felt, when sometimes, during talks and in WT comments somebody spoke about gays that they are disgusting and the typical stuff... Felt sorry for them... They must have felt very lonely ...

Your experiences?

Albert

VIII

Elder in our cong died of AIDS. They tried to cover it up and say he had an unknown cancer (unknown cancer?! WTF) but it was acknowledged he was as gay as they come and everyone was trying to figure out how an elder, unmarried, could get AIDS. (connect the dots people)

AIDS was in it's infancy and this guy had a *roommate*, male, about 20 years younger. He, mysteriously, was not a JW. Just like you said, the single sisters were after him, young and old. He was about 38 when he died.

He was so obviously gay you wondered why they would bother, but, I have a cousin who is so obviously gay I wonder how any guy would go after her. She ended up pregnant. (She tried to go the guy direction to please her parents (JWs) and ended up knocked up)

There were a couple of others, but this guy, John, stands out because he was beloved by everyone. He was just so popular. Then he shrivled up and died within a period of about 6 months.

Odd thing, when I have discussed this *Gay* issued with my JW relatives and how they resolve this as JWs, the explanation is that as long as someone is not a "Practicing Homosexual" Jehovah is fine with it.

Huh? Practicing Homosexual?

I asked my mom about my cousin who has a girlfriend, who is obviously "Practicing" and she said she wouldn't discuss it. It was none of her business. My cousin is at her house (mom) a couple of times a week.

As long as my mom doesn't see Cousin and Gal Pal lip locking she's OK with it I guess. Cie la vie.

outofservice

Yes my husband and I actually were married by a gay elder (long story). Anyway he was married with two children. The funny thing was when he first moved to our hall and commented he had such an obvious lisp just about everybody turned around to look. I know that was wrong, but in a hall it was a strange thing to hear.He was married for a number of years but I guess it was to much for him, he left her and the "truth" started taking drugs. The last I heard he was living with a guy and off the drugs. Sad all the way around.

Dagney

I lost a friend 8 years ago to AIDS. He struggled with his sexuality for years, I even tried to "save him" theocratically when I was in. The funny thing is we traveled together and the the brothers never bothered us because they knew. I would even visit him when he was very sick, and the end was near, stay with him and take him to the meeting. His elders never questioned me, or my family.

It's a long story what happened to him. But boy did I learn a lot about it. I am so thankful I knew him, and understand more about it all...I miss him and think of him almost every day.

Gosh it was a sad story...he tried to come back to "the truth" after years of being out, not DF. An elder found him D2D, convinced him to come back to meetings, only to DF him 2 weeks later...they didn't even know him. They said they did it because the public knew of his actions. They punished him for trying to come back. They forced him back out, he behaved recklessly trying to find love somewhere. He is responsible for his actions, but the brothers kicked him to the curb when he needed them most.

Fortunately for me, it was one of the nails in the JW coffin for me.

Mattieu

Plenty congregation in Melbourne recently had a local needs talk on homosexuality and sexually experimenting with members of the same sex. Same night 3 pioneers were removed and 2 other brothers reproved.

Every congo I have been in has had “sus” brothers...... “Not that there is anything wrong with it”.

My favourite was the Ned Flanders look alike who had a nice lisp and effeminate gestures to go with it!

oompa

I know or have known so many gays it is ridiculous.......i must be a gay magnet for both sides......anyhoo......i know four younger gay dubs that room together...have known two of them over twenty years......

everyone who knows them at all knows they are gay.....guess what they do when the slip up???????...........go to the elders????......thank god no..........but ..........

they aux. pioneer the next month!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!...............pennance or pentanance or whatever..........sick/barf........oompa

Purza

I never had "gadar" when I was a dub - so I generally wouldn't know. I did have one friend that I grew up with that I always suspected was a lesbian. Turns out she is - she was DF'd for awhile, but back in and still unmarried, but always living with female "roommates".

For the most part, I think I went along as a good JW thinking the best of everyone and never realizing there were gay individuals suffering as JWs.

Purza

iknowall558

There was a young guy in our cong. known him since birth. Has a younger bro. Mum a witness and dad an MS. It was obvious from an early age that he had the gay thing going on...(no offense). He always hung out with girls, liked dressing up and loved dancing. Anyway, the teenage years came along and he did end up getting baptized , left school and found a job. He was a very likeable boy, got on well with everyone and had a good spark about him. So, the inevitable happened . After he had a few dalliances with some of the young sisters, his true preference came to the fore and he ended up getting DF. I DA'd not long after , and his mum and dad both shun me on a weekly basis.......but I don't know how many times I've seen them in the local supermarket, .......his mum shunning ME while helping her gay DF son AND his boyfriend load up their trolley with their weekly shopping. Hmmmm..............

mindmelda

Its' one of the saddest things about the religion to me that people can't be themselves in it, regardless of what they are. Those who are heterosexual suffer under needless sexual micro managing, too.

But, yes, it was one of the first things that got me out of the JW mindset, the needless homophobia, pretending homosexuality doesn't exist among Witnesses and this ridiculous "don't ask don't tell" that goes on.

How can you be a "non practicing homosexual"? It's the most ridiculous nitpicking assine thing I ever heard. And they condemn Catholic priests for enforcing celibacy? Isn't this the same thing, forcing someone to be celibate simply because of his normal sexual attractions?

The six scriptures used in the Bible to condemn homosexuality do not address a Christian homosexual couple who want to have a committed and loving relationship. They only address matters like prostitution, rape, sexual predation and other socially unacceptable, "unlawful" behavior that is homosexual in nature.

If the JWs really studied their scriptures as they claim to, they'd find that out too. The information is out there, just look for it.

dinah

I have an online friend who let me read his writings about growing up gay and JW. It was so hard to read, I had to pause and cry about every two pages or so (and I never cry). The feelings of worthlessness were unbearable to read about. This man spent his entire adult life (up until about 2 years ago) feeling he was broken or flawed. He did say that when they referred to gays and such during the meetings, he felt horrible. He seriously thought of suicide. Thank the FSM he didn't follow through.

We did have one guy in our congregation. He was df'd once amid rumors of gayness. Then he fought his way back, got reinstated, got married.....haven't heard from him in over 15 years.

gays in your congregation...?

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