We Don't Want to Know Why You're Leaving

by passwordprotected 42 Replies latest jw friends

  • crapola
    crapola

    I have never been asked what my reasons for not going are. I was in the same congregation for over 35 years and NO ONE has ever asked. I find that very un-caring. They don't realise that showing a little concern for people might keep them in the org. although with what I've learned it would'nt help me now.

  • ninja
    ninja

    someone asked me why I was staying....and phoned me a taxi.....he he

  • Scarred for life
    Scarred for life

    This is a great thread. I can relate to all the posts. Very similar things have happened to me or to my family or even within my extended family. I've got to read that Steve Hassan book.

  • flipper
    flipper

    PASSWORD- Sorry to hear your former witness friends didn't want to know why you were leaving the witneses. But most witnesses don't want to be confused with the facts. It would be too revealing to them and cause them to doubt the mind controlling cult. And those facts would scare the $hit out of them

  • passwordprotected
    passwordprotected

    @ Billy great post.

    @ Buzzkid, I agree re. the JWs feeling they might be in danger of being grabbed and forced to jump too.

  • AllTimeJeff
    AllTimeJeff

    This is a great thread.

    I tend to be a bit sympathetic to the cult members still in. Many don't know any better. Remember, the GB already has dealt with practically all who have left, and for any reason you can think of for leaving.

    For any (ex) elders out there, why do you think we would periodically get these obscure letters, or CO talk outlines for the elders on problems you never heard of before? Because the GB is in permanent CYA mode. They give answers for questions no one has even thought of yet, but I suppose that is one symptom of group paranoia.

    That really does affect the general membership. You have to be taught to be afraid of differences, taught to view those who leave the borg are leaving you. It wouldn't occur to you to just love people and see everyone as on their own journey.

    The GB are evil geniuses. They train people not to care.

    Password, I bet you already know this, but those people do want to know on a deeper level why you left, and are probably very curious. They are just dealing with a major case of cognitive dissonance.

  • VM44
    VM44

    Let me ask simply ask this question.

    Do the Jehovah's Witnesses really like people?

  • besty
    besty

    Understanding that cult members have two personalities - a cult and one and a real one - has been a great enlightener for me.

    'Cult' friends and family are shunning me, but 'real' friends and family feel the painful side effects from their evil Siamese misbehaviour.

    Hopefully one day they will be have enough saved in their emotional bank account for the operation to be separated.

  • truthsetsonefree
    truthsetsonefree

    Whenever I read stories like this I'm amazed. I went through this and it was so painful. Even knowing it was coming I still felt alone, like maybe it was something unique to me. Or something I did wrong or offensive. It seemed so unnatural. I had one friend, we were in each other's weddings, I was his best man. I can't help but wonder what he thinks when he looks at those pictures. I wrote all of my friends individually explaining what was happening. Some did respond but for the most part the silence was deafening.

    Isaac

  • passwordprotected
    passwordprotected

    One friend of Gail's, during what turned out to be their last conversation ever, told her, "I'm looking at you and I can see that it's you, but somehow it's not you."

    This is a woman who's known Gail like a sister since they were teenagers. And because Gail had stopped going to meetings, she'd ceased to be the human being that her friend had known.

    Yes, she looked physically the same.

    Yes, when she spoke her voice was the same.

    But now her "love for Jehovah" wasn't the same. She'd turned her back on Jehovah, was the friend's conclusion.*

    *This confirmed to me that it's impossible for most JWs to disentangle the name Jehovah with the notion of buildings, books, magazines and old men.

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