Why a JC if the adulterous mate is forgiven?

by snugglebunny 19 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • HeyThere

    One of my relatives had a judicial committee formed when she went to the elders for help after the death of a friend. She went because she was repentant. She had stayed drinking allot and messed around with a guy. Not only did they disfellowship her during a very trying emotional time, but they also asked her some of the most personal questions. They were specifically asking her where she licked, sucked, etc. And required quite graphic answers, including how much she liked it, etc. She is born in, and still was very upset about it all...upset enough to tell me about it even though she knows my stance. Even her die hard jw mom was appalled. But she still is as jw as ever...and has even said that the reason I stopped going to meetings is because the devil is at work.

    The control this religion has on believing members is so strong, it doesn't surprise me at all that they would insist on graphic confessions and that members give those duals even if they don't feel is right "from a human standpoint"

  • DesirousOfChange

    I served as a elder for 20 years. Sat on dozens of such JCs. It all seemed soooo right then.

    So why does trying to explain this "spirit directed" concept to a UBM sound so terribly and completely embarrassing and F#@KED UP now?

    All you other former elders-- what were we thinking?

    Image result for head up ass


  • pontoon
    I served as an elder for about 15 yrs. When forming a committee for a case that involved adultery, fornication I would not volunteer myself ever. There was always certain brothers that would not miss a chance to sit on a judicial covering that type of case. I always felt that these same brothers were closet perverts, actually enjoying hearing about the sexual misbehaving of others.
  • OnTheWayOut

    My OP refers to a real actual situation. The husband was not a JW, so no input was sought from him. He was actually furious at what he perceived to be an outright intrusion into his private life and begged his wife not to attend.

    I am not 100% sure on the rules, and I know this option would not be mentioned to the "worldly" husband. But I believe he could still insist on being present for any judicial matter with his wife. He is her "head" according to them. Insisting upon being there could have, at the very least, caused the committee to just forget about the whole thing.

  • stuckinarut2

    What happens behind closed doors IS NOT the business of three men!

    The very premise is disgusting!

    Years ago, I heard of one person in such a meeting, who turned the tables on the elders when she realised that she was being dealt with wrongly. (She was hauled into a JC meeting on false pretences based on a slanderous rumour. Then she was asked the most disgusting things that implied she had slept with a co-worker. It was utter garbage, and she kept denying it.)

    So she asked them "so, how often do you and your wife have sex? How do you do it? What positions do you like? Have you ever licked her "down there"?

    She was DF almost immediately for being disrespectful!!

  • sowhatnow

    as a wife who was cheated on by a x jw, and then forgave, [fool i was , so i left him again]

    Id find it to be no ones business. and if it were me , id in no way go tell anyone my affairs.

    I strongly feel if a jw woman cheats on a non jw husband, and he forgives her, its no ones business but the husbands, he is her head [according to jw rules] and regardless of his religious standing, he has the right to tell her not to go to the elders,and he also has authority over the elders for his own family.

    its a family matter, not an offense against someone in the congregation,

    [ i m sure there were not two witnesses, lol]

    and it does not need at all to be made public.

    the prying into peoples personal affairs, is not biblical. only when a person foolishly allows themselves to come under the regulations of the elders is when there will be additional problems.

    no matter what anyone says, if someone gets DF , they never ever have the stain of the 'sin' erased from the minds of everyone else. twenty years later someone will remember that one thing they did wrong, and not the multiple things they did right.

    think about it,

    If you don't tell, who will know?

  • sparrowdown

    The Salem witch trials comes to mind. Same mentality.

    Men have been doing this sort of thing to women for centuries.

    The borg's intrusive policies regarding this sort of thing may just bring it down ...one day.

  • James Mixon
    James Mixon

    have any ex-elders here had a case where someone denied committing

    adultery or fornication when the other party had come forward to confess??

    Lets say the woman come forward , the guilt is too much. If the

    guy comes in and tell the elders I have no idea what this woman is talking

    about, I have never touch her, she is nuts, what can the elders do???

    Another topic on child abuse I believe someone mention this, two witness thing.


    I believe in searching women for "witch marks."


  • RubaDub

    blow-by-blow account of her affair

    You make me laugh. Great visual!

    Rub a Dub

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