Re what you said:
I truly believe if both people are willing to compromise, it is not giving up anything. Compromising is not giving up on anything. You make choices to help each other out, and that in turn helps yourself out, and in the end, it can work out. I believe ANYTHING...ANYTHING, can work, if you have two people, who are willing to compromise, you can make anything work.
I agree 100%; to me this is the only way a relationship can withstand the years. If one person is not able to, it doesn't matter what their reasons are, the other is a doormat. This should be ringing a big loud warning bell to you. You're a man right?
Seems to me her biggest fear is, she would get in trouble from her congregation for having a "worldly" man, and that she would then lose the privilege of being able to go door to door. She would also never hear the end of it from her congregation for being in a relationship with a worldly man. Once a JW is married, if it is to a non JW, do they actually encourage you to divorce that person?? I have not heard of THAT, but I have heard they are pretty strongly against it, and try with the guilt trip all the time.
She wouldn't lose the privilege of field service, nobody loses that. There are a few random privileges she might lose but as a woman, nothing significant. A man would lose the holy privilege of say, handing out the microphones. A woman might not be able to have a field service group at her house. Cry me a river. You are, as you say, giving up infinitely more, and she's pretending that doesn't compare. Run, run, open your eyes and run.
How do you tell a human being "OK, you can only fall in love with certain people, and if it just so happens to be that you do the human thing and fall in love with another human who is not in our religion, to bad, so sad, spend your life lonely and without them"
Yeah that's a bummer. You won't spend your life sad and lonely though. You've clearly got her on a pedestal that it would probably take you a few years to dismantle, but then you'd notice how many actual sweethearts there are out there.
I do realize, me coming back, and asking for help once again, makes me look like a fool. I understand that. I know everyone here must be thinking "why doesn't this guy just leave already, there is so many other woman out there, why is he letting himself get kicked around like this?"
No not a fool; and certainly not the first person it's happened to.
I need to say for my own dignity, that when we are together, or talking on the phone or whatever, and religion is not part of it, it is absolutely incredible, just a awesome relationship. I can't even find the best words to describe it, but when she is not trying to pressure me into converting, it is the best feeling I ever get in the world, and I am not ever happier than I am in those moments.
That's great, but apparently you're not in each other's company often, and are in different cities? When the holiday is over, a couple of years down the track, the only thing left in your life will be those religion moments. Take all of those ugly moments you've had together over that, add them together, and multiply by the rest of your life. That's your future.
That is just something I want you guys to know, so that you understand my motive here. If I give up this woman, I give up on love, and ever having love in my life again, she is just amazing.
I'm sure she's amazing and pretty great for you and otherwise a perfect match, but you won't be giving up on love. Those are the words of a delusional person. You can't tell, because you're the delusional person.
At the same time, I have to stick to MY OWN guns as well. I will continue to offer my compromises, but beyond that point, I just do not think I could do anything else (become a baptized door to door JW)
Sure, offer your compromises. See how much longer you can bear it.