JWs and Domestic Violence

Amha·aret

I remember when I was in my early teens finding out about a JW brother who was hitting his jw wife. Her parents were also witnesses and were disgusted with his behaviour (and rightly so). I was completely shocked at the time, thinking those kinds of things just didn't happen among a loving brotherhood. I've since heard of numerous other cases of it.

Why is this?

Is it the pressure that the org puts on brothers?
Is it the sisters feeling they have no where to go? And can't leave if its not so bad as to put their physical lives in danger?
Is it control? Embarrassment?

Or is the occurance of domestic violence among JWs no better or worse than the world's average?

I've no answers to these questions but was wondering what other's thoughts are on it.

snowbird

I was floored when I went to work for the police department and found cases of DV on so many JW's.

One elder beat his wife so badly that she had to be hospitalized.

When I went through his records, I found out that he had once been indicted for MURDER!!!

The "spiritual paradise" is a hoax, a mirage, a pipe dream, a... well, you get my drift.

Sylvia

Mandette

Domestic Violence is everywhere. Across all boundaries of race, religion, economic status. It's right up there with child abuse as being kept secret. So many factors go into it. Mental illness, anger issues, drug/alcohol abuse, stress. And some men(AND women too) are just plain ole a-holes that need a dirt nap.

just my .02

Mandette

hillbilly

I have to think some of it is frustration. The JW's sell a notion of headship and a division of spritual responisbilty that just doesnt work in real life.

Tell a young guy he needs to control a woman with a mind of her own...then give him no real way to do that... it's gonna get ugly lots of times. He has also been lead to think that that girl he's married read the same playbook and WILL be submissive.... what a shock eh?

JW society has its misfits and jerks on top of all that nonsense too. Some people are just in a "profile" to act certain ways regardless of the religion they participate in.

Hill

Amha·aret

Wow, murder! He must've really done a number on his Mrs too. Wonder if he ever got reproved etc for it...

snowbird

Wow, murder! He must've really done a number on his Mrs too. Wonder if he ever got reproved etc for it...

He really did.

The elders didn't want her to go to the police, but this guy broke her arm among other things.

I don't know how the congregation handled his past criminal record. Judging by the accounts I've read on here, they probably covered over it.

I wonder if his wife knew before she married him. It gave me the shivers just reading about it.

Sylvia

blondie

jw women are not encouraged to leave their abusive husbands because staying means their husband's salvation.

*** yb90 p. 64 1990 Yearbook of Jehovah’s Witnesses ***In this country a Bible study was started with the wife of a military officer. She and her five children soon started attending meetings. Strong opposition from her husband began; he even beat her with his army belt. As the harsh opposition continued, the woman endeavored to practice the Christian principles she had learned. Eventually, the consistency of her good Christian conduct made a deep impression on her husband. He has since retired and is now studying the Bible with one of our brothers.

*** w07 4/15 pp. 17-18 A Field "White for Harvesting" ***Bible with the Witnesses. Daniel, her live-in partner, ridiculed her and physically abused her and their three children. Even though he later agreed to study the Bible along with Teresa, he often went on drinking sprees with his friends, sometimes for four or five days. His family was left impoverished. Teresa continued to study faithfully and to attend Christian meetings. This helped Daniel to see the importance of studying the Bible. Then one of their children accidentally fell into a boiling kettle and died of severe burns. Besides enduring the deep grief of losing a son, Teresa had to face pressure from friends and neighbors to observe unscriptural funeral customs.
During that difficult time, this couple received encouraging help and comfort from members of congregations nearby. After the funeral, they continued to receive comforting visits from the local Wayuu-language congregation. Upon seeing Christian love in action, Daniel was moved to make spiritual progress. He stopped drinking and mistreating Teresa. Daniel and Teresa got married, and he began working hard to support his family. They progressed spiritually and were baptized in 2003. Both conduct several Bible studies.

*** fy chap. 11 p. 131 par. 7 Maintain Peace in Your Household ***A woman in Japan experienced this. She was opposed by her husband for 11 years. He harshly mistreated her and frequently locked her out of the house. But she persevered. Friends in the Christian congregation helped her. She prayed incessantly and drew much encouragement from 1 Peter 2:20. This Christian woman was convinced that if she remained firm, someday her husband would join her in serving Jehovah. And he did.

dinah

Blondie,

I always hated that "won without a word" mentality. Witness women are even supposed to let a man beat their children so he can study and be saved? Those men probably are still doing the same things, just they now have the cover of the two-witness rule.

Sick, sick, sick.

keyser soze

I knew of two differen't sisters who were abused by their husbands. One was married to an unbelieving mate, the other wasn't. The one who was, got pressured to move back in with her abusive husband, only to be beaten again. The other was beaten because her unbelieving mate, who hated the fact that she was a JW, tried to get her to watch an apostate video,and she refused.She was fully supported by the elders in her decision to separate from her husband. The double standard in the two cases was one of the things that helped wake up to the fact that it wasn't really the truth.

misguided

I (and my kids) are victims of JW allowed domestic violence. My JW ex-husband served a 30-day sentence (ankle bracelet) and 1 year probabtion for what he did to us.

Just one of many stories...There was a time I took my son to the meeting. My now ex-husband would not let me take my baby to the mother's room. Fortunately, my daughter was 18 months younger than him (he was about 2 1'/2 at the time) She needed her diaper changed, so I took my son with me. My ex had beet my son with a shoe, so badly that his back was bruised from top to bottom. I showed another mom in the mother's room what my ex had done to him. She did nothing. I needed help. The JW's were not there. The "world" helped us. Thank god. That was my big "wake-up" from this cult.

JWs and Domestic Violence

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