I finally said it...It's time for us to get divorce

by kzjw 38 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • Awakened at Gilead
    Awakened at Gilead

    OTWO,

    I think kzjw is a Christian UBM, not an exJW...

    Lance

  • OnTheWayOut
    OnTheWayOut

    So sorry, I usually know this kinda stuff before I comment on such a serious issue.
    I didn't read your profile this time. I forgot. I stand by the rest of what I said about
    the anger and working it out.

    If the relationship is strained over other issues, the JW stuff seems worse. If the
    other issues cannot be worked out, don't expect the JW stuff to be worked out.
    They are trained to just accept the beliefs, not necessarily to understand and
    explain them.

  • Quandry
    Quandry

    it took a long time for me to realize we were being hornswoggled

    That expression brought back memories....thanks for the laugh!!!

  • Quandry
    Quandry

    insearchoftruth,

    but I need to look at all the qualities of the woman, not the ones being imposed on her by the organization and realize if she and I can come to some compromise, some meeting of the minds that there are many wonderful qualities about her....

    If she continues to study with the witnesses, that will become more and more a remote possibility. It's hard to explain to a person who has never been a witness...

    My advice is to book a cruise over the Christmas holiday, or get out of town as much as possible (at any time), and away from the JWs..There just IS NO COMPROMISE.

  • sinis
    sinis

    You are looking at this from the WRONG angle. Do not attempt to prove THEM wrong. You need to focus on the foundation, the root of religion so to speak. Give her this article. Its an eye opener:

    http://www.thepeoplesvoice.org/cgi-bin/blogs/voices.php/2007/08/06/p18661

  • LouBelle
    LouBelle

    I'm with PEC on this. Besides why are you trying to force her to see things your way, especially if she's not ready to see it. You need to make your peace with the fact that you see god or faith differently. Try reading a new earth, helps in showing how to let go of ego & pain body. Seriously dude, I hope you think things through a bit more.

  • Billy the Ex-Bethelite
    Billy the Ex-Bethelite

    Tough situation, I wish you the best.

    Reading this thread reminded me of some "wise advice" from GB member Garrett Losch. As I recall, he stated this "gem" shortly after he was appointed to the Gov Bod. He was chairman for a Morning Worship program that was held in Brooklyn and broadcast to Wallkill and Patterson. Maybe even Canada branch was tied in that morning. I think the text was about "marrying only in the Lord". So, in his rambling comments, he explains that a brother or sister may be very much in love and think they have much in common with this unbeliever. But just dump them and find somebody in "the truth". It's simple enough to find someone else and fall in love with them. He continues... There are lots of brothers and sisters right here in the Bethel family whose mates have died, so they just find someone else and love them as much as the first mate.

    At the time he said it, I thought it rather odd that someone would cheapen a loving relationship and the pain and heart-ache that accompanies death, by pointing out that a widow or widower just "found someone else" and fell in love, which fixed everything. Later, I found out that many married people were upset by the comments of just replacing a deceased mate with whoever came along next. Losch had a knack for casually making remarks that were truly thoughtless, sometimes hurtful, often stupid.

    So, if you do divorce, take it from GB member Gerritt Losch... just find somebody else to love!

    Sorry to go off-course here, I just had to share this flashback.

    B the X

  • jaguarbass
    jaguarbass

    There is a song that says "you always hurt the ones you love".

    Things are not going your way so your going to kick the dog?

    I was an angry young man once also.

    You can start out reading your erroneous zones by Dr. Wayne Dyer.

    I left escaped the tower in 83. My wife did not escape until about 95.

    Passive resistance can be more effective in getting what you want than a hit over the head.

    Then again maybe you want a divorce.

    Its the American way.

    What ever you do, you and it will be all right.

    It just takes time.

    Marriage is a legal contract to share assets and liabilities.

    If it's not financialy in your interest than divorce may be the way to go.

    But from what I see often times divorce is economically very damaging.

    My brother in law has to pay his wacky JW wife who he divorced more money than I make a month per month for the rest of his life.

  • XxJazzxX
    XxJazzxX

    Oh yea. This post will come in handy as well because I too have serious hate for the WT. The messed up thing about my marriage was, we NEVER bumped head on religion until we got married and after our daughter was born. She somewhat refuses to listen what i have to say about because to her, "since i've never studied with them, i dont know anything about what they know". There are times where i REALLY want to discuss the bible with her and it kills me that I have to come to her in a different angle every time.

    I'm at the point where I feel like religion has depleted the love out of our marriage, although she may feel otherwise. Knowing that I'm the odd-man out, I'm left with only having to rely on some kind of event that will lead her to question the WT or see if I can get through to her with our daughter. I really want to start thinking for herself instead of avoiding what I say all the time.

    Well...I did kind of leave a mark on her today! Finally, my wife actually sat down with me with her bible as we were discussing christmas(and this was after she said she dont want to go anything with the bible with me because of the simple fact i dont study with her or her folks). Somehow we got into the whole thing with John 1:1. I told her to look in John 17:3 her NWT. She understands that Jehovah is the one true God, and Jesus is a god to her. Next, I told her to look at John 1:1 in the NWT. And specifically asked her, "Based on John 17:3 and John 1:1, is Jesus a true god or a false god?" I can tell she was stumped because she tried so hard to look for something in her NWT to bounce back and kept repeating that Jesus is a god and Jehovah is the one true god, but that doesnt answer my question no matter how hard she tried. Nevertheless, I fear she will ignore this and continue what she's doing.

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