what happens if I die?

by halcyon 13 Replies latest jw friends

  • LockedChaos
    LockedChaos

    Oompa

    How did you know that my death

    instructions were what you said??

    Actually, just gonna get torched instead.

    The wife is then throw a big party

    with many libations, both wet and dry.

  • KungFu
  • Honesty
    Honesty

    I have made it easy on my real friends who will attend my funeral service if there is one.

    Since all my family except for my youngest (12 year-old son) have turned their backs on me because I left Jehovah and it's not my church family's resposibility to make any arrangements other than a small service if they want one, I decided to donate my body for research.

    The University of Tennessee has a Forensics Program.

    I'm sure they'll be interested in examining the body of someone who used to be a JW for the following reasons:

    Check my DNA to see if any genetic abnormalities formed as the result of my being a JW.

    Check my body to see what effect prolonged WTBTS Theocratic activities had on it.

    Check my brain to see if there are any remnants of WTBTS doctrines lurking in it before they put me out on the Body Farm with all the other corpses.

    Wouldn't want me coming back to life after Armageddon and the first person the other corpses are greeted by is a flaming apostate that the JW god forgot about when he started the JW resurrection, would we now.

    They wouldn't get an opportunity to have a NOO SYSTEM Bible Study after spending 5 minutes with this old 'resurrected by mistake' apostate.

  • sweetstuff
    sweetstuff

    I've made a plan, its simple, burn me to a crisp and throw me in the ocean. Ta da. Done. Then I want my loved ones to go on with living. Period.

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