Emotionally drained

by heybaby 24 Replies latest jw experiences

  • heybaby
    heybaby

    Well, my husband and I have a very interesting conversation last night. We got into another "discussion" about the validity of the WTS and whether or not they teach the truth....I expected that, so it wasn't a big deal. What I didn't expect is the interesting turn that the conversation took. We actually discussed getting a divorce. All sorts of things started coming to light. As it turns out, it's not just the fact that I no longer believe in the WTS. My husband and I have had serious problems since the beginning of our marriage. You know that saying "sometimes people fall out of love?" Well, apparently it has happened to us. There are no longer romantic feelings between us; in fact, those feelings have been gone for a while. We agreed that we have stayed married more out of convenience than for true love. I told him that I know that I am not the person who completes him, and he agreed. He also said he knows that he is not the person who completes me. When we got married, I had just turned 18 and he was only 21. Much too young, even for "mature witness kids." Anyway, I'm not sure where we will go from here, but something big is about to happen, I can just feel it.......

  • Satanus
    Satanus

    Get a divorce, already.

    S

  • compound complex
    compound complex

    Dear Heybaby,

    I know your pain ...

    Love,

    CoCo

  • minu
    minu

    (((((((((Hey Baby)))))))))))))

    So sorry you're having to deal with this. It's pretty sad when a couple comes to that realization. I hope both of you can find the inner peace you both need. Here's to happier days in the future.

  • heybaby
    heybaby

    Satanus, I don't appreciate your apparent lack of concern for the seriousness of this. It's hard to let go of something that you have built your life around for many years, no matter whether it was happy or unhappy. Such a callous disposition is somewhat disheartening.

  • mrsjones5
    mrsjones5

    Ignore Satanus

  • New light for you
    New light for you

    heybaby....

    So sorry to hear that... dont forget to just ignore people who arean't helful replyers...

    I'm so sad to hear that. When my husband left the 'truth' and i was still in, we were ABSOLUTELY getting divorced... and you could say that we had other issues than the religion...definately every marriage has issues, but let me tell you, someone being in, and the other knowing it's a cult... i dont see how that can work. I can see how if you're just 'unbelieving" but to KNOW your spouse is in a MIND CONTROLLING CULT.. I think it's too much.

    Somehow i 'woke up' and left as well... let me tell you , all those other 'issues' we thought were so important arent. Being away from the witnesses is the best thing you can do, it changes everything.. and suddenly there are a million options out there for you!

    I wish you the best, maybe he can see the light. There are plenty of people on the site who have gotten their spouses out, i'm sure they'll share.

  • Metamorphosis
    Metamorphosis

    HeyBaby,

    Sorry to hear about your troubles. I think alot of JW"s end up getting married too young and later find out they don't really know each other. My ex and I had to work constantly at our relationship even when we were both "in" due to the fact as well.

    I certainly am not in any position to try to give advice, I kind of flopped my last test on the subject - but hopefully you two can come to a common understanding of what you want whether that is staying together or parting so that whatever conclusion is reached it at least will be mutual.

    Keep your chin up - remember life has it's speedbumps but overall the journey can be wonderful. Hoping you can start enjoying it soon.

    Jeremiah - aka Morph

  • Metamorphosis
    Metamorphosis
    It's hard to let go of something that you have built your life around for many years, no matter whether it was happy or unhappy.

    I can wholeheartedly testify to that statement. Even though my ex cheated on me, left me, and wanted a divorce - there was the part of me that still cried out to try to make it work after 10 years together. Again - my thoughts are with you as you go through this.

    Jeremiah - aka Morph

  • jamiebowers
    jamiebowers

    As painful as divorce is, it may just the ticket you need to completely get out of the cult and live a free life. My best to you.

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