You will never overcome your Witness past...

by JimmyPage 42 Replies latest jw friends

  • lfcviking

    Interesting post.

    you say;

    You will never overcome your witness past

    Hmmm, i'm not sure about this. I think you can overcome your witness past, but of course it takes strength, determination and a certain resolve to move forward and make a fresh start.

    But you will always have at your core a view of the world that the Witnesses gave you

    You may have their teachings in your head for a while, but the longer you've been out of the org the more you realise what they taught you was a load of shit. After you have left and start to live a normal life, you begin to realise the very manipulative, obsessive, paranoid and sometimes childish methods that the WTBTS used on you. You then realise that they use such methods in a desperate attempt to keep all of its members under control and held captive.

    The worst thing that could affect you for a long time after, is that if you still have family members in the cult who shun you (on the instructions of the org) after you have left. If this happened to me, i imagine this would be truly painful and i certainly wouldn't wish this on anyone else and i feel for anyone who has had it done to them.

    I agree that apostasy certainly does help you after your exit, and websites like this do make a good contribution to your recovery, but i dont think apostasy on its own it is the sole cure of overcoming your 'Witness' past.

    Good post though!


  • Awakened at Gilead
    Awakened at Gilead

    Some one said that this is an apostate website... ohhh I didn't know... I better leave now...

  • JimmyPage

    Awakened at Gilead you are right. Apparently I am posting under the influence. But using statements that would shock most dubs like "apostasy is the cure" tends to cut through the crap and get people's attention faster than using terms like "deprogram". Be patient with me. I am reading alot and it's going to take time. I'm going to get there though!

  • Quandry

    The only true cure for Jehovah's Witnesses is apostasy.

    I really don't think there is a complete "cure."

    Deep down inside us...memories are always there..... I think that is why we all post here........

  • BabaYaga

    Jimmy Page, you are spot-on.

    I was out for TWO DECADES. Knew they were not the Truth, but thought they were "harmless", even though I personally had experienced the loss of loved ones in death due to their practices!!!

    It was not until I was searching on the internet for a subject TOTALLY unrelated, and accidentally discovered this site... that I truly came to grips with my own reality.

    Cheers to that!


    This is so true. After my wife's attack, both her and I went into therapy. It dredged up some rather unpleasant stuff that I thought I had jettisoned, especially about victims of rape. Fortunately, I was able to resolve that.However, I wonder when I will ever be trully free of the baggage from the WTB&S?

  • beksbks

    Lou Belle is right, the word "apostasy" or "apostate" is not a JW word. It originates in the 14th century, and merely means to renounce your religious beliefs.

    There are so many issues that linger, not just the loss of family. Of course I am speaking about born ins. It's amazing how much crap can be attributed to a JW upbringing. There is no trust. Not in the world, nor in yourself. It's pretty hard to deprogram someone who's entire formative years were spent in a cult. You tell that child from birth that the color of grass is pink, and everyone in their life says it's pink too. Finally after 20 years of looking at grass and thinking it's pink, you find out it was all lies, and grass is actually green. You will forever have to look at grass, first see pink, and then tell your logical mind no, it's green. Scarred for Life has it right, and her name (sorry, you are a she, right?) says it all.

    Middle English apostasie, from Late Latin apostasia, from Greek, literally, revolt, from aphistasthai to revolt, from apo- + histasthai to stand — more at stand
    14th century
    1 : renunciation of a religious faith 2 : abandonment of a previous loyalty : defection
  • *summer*

    This thread reminds me of watching documentaries on holocaust survivors.

    For some of them, the pain is still raw. Even after all those years, memories of concentration camps and memories of family and friends who did not make it still make them cry. While others have allowed time to heal their wounds, but not without leaving a permanent scar that will always serve as a reminder.

    Perhaps coming out of a cult shares many similarities with being a holocaust survivor...:-(

  • Princess Daisy Boo
    Princess Daisy Boo

    I totally get what you are saying Jimmy Page.

    We can all sit around and argue semantics and whether using Their terms to describe something means you are still indoctrinated, but the point is until you realise they are not the Truth, you can never truly be free.

    I have discarded 99.999% of the beliefs I grew up with, but I do battle to replace them

  • Scarred for life
    Scarred for life

    My scars and lingering wounds are not due to me still believing that anything the JWs say is "the truth". I have not believed a word of their teachings for at least 32 years. There was maybe a 3 year period before that that I left the meetings and all that crap but still had lingering doubts. But that is long, long gone.

    My scars and wounds are emotional. From the lies, the control, the brainwashing, the separation from "the world", the conditional love and friendships. Those horrendous and frightening "dramas and the conventions would scar anyone. And all the obsession with sex. I think that constitutes sexual abuse right there. Children should not be listening to all that. There is no respect for children at all in JW.

    I have trouble trusting ANYONE. I have struggled with extremely poor self-esteem. I still struggle with feeling "different" from most people and on the sidelines.

    I would imagine that almost anyone that was raised from birth in this cult would have many of these same issues.

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