chickpea, you are an amazing parent for helping your child with his struggle. So many parents would freak out and tell him that he's crazy. Letting him be around other people like him is probably the best possible thing you can do. He will finally feel like he's not alone. It will be an incredible healing experience for him. Be proud of yourself!!!
parenting a transgendered teen
by chickpea 31 Replies latest social family
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chickpea
an amazing parent for helping your child with his struggle
as much as i appreciate the very supportive accolades
(and i do....sincerely, i am most grateful)
i have to ask in all sincerety... isnt it just WRONG
that what should come as instinctive and without a
second thought, the nuturance of an offspring, the support
of a struggling and suffering child, has actually come to be
the exception, rather than the norm?my child tells me of those on forums in his community of support
whose parents refuse to accept their child's "questioning", being
dismissive or hysterical, or hateful and rejecting....maybe having had to stand at the foot of an emergency room gurney,
seeing 11 leads, lines and tubes coming out of "his" 4 YO dying body
and watching 7 medical personnel enacting a choreography of disciplined
precision and skill and hearing thru a haze " no breath sounds.... life support...
3 rounds and no response"... standing there praying to be spared having to
know what life would be without this gift from the gods.... maybe that made
hearing the words " i need to be a boy" just part of loving the miracle that is my sondunno... just seems so incredibly wrong to
think love is more or less than what it is...
freely given without condition -
coolhandluke
awesome. good job mom. give your son a high five from me for having the guts to stand up and be brave.
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chickpea
my opinion is that it is a birth defect
gender dysphoria http://www.wisegeek.com/what-is-gender-dysphoria.htm
There is a growing body of evidence that Gender Identity Disorder (GID) as described in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual IV (DSM IV) (1994) is at least in part, the result of insufficient or inappropriate androgenization of the brain at a critical stage of embryonic development. As a result, the affected individual may be left with somewhere between a partial and a full sense of having a cross-sexed gender identity. Essentially creating a not-male, not-female but otherwise permanent gender variant condition. Even though there apparently are some individuals who fall very close to or dead-center on the gender identity spectrum, most gender variant people can easily identify with being closer to one end of the spectrum then the other. http://www.avitale.com/developmentalreview.htm
one huge issue right now is the lack of understanding
about the difference between gender and orientation....
TGs can be oriented as variantly as non-TGs
straight/gay/lesbian/bi/pan/asexual....my child is not a lesbian, altho
he is perceived as such.....
being in a physically female body
but representing as a male, there is
an almost automatic knee-jerk
assumption he is a baby dyke....for edification and PC-ness,
when in doubt, the question to ask:
how do you identify?
most people in a sexual minority
will appreciate a desire to be clear.....long and uphill road ahead....
wonder how much support/empathy
we might have gotten had we not
"drifted" away from the b0rg?guess we will never know!
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SG Seattle
Ditto all the other comments. Don't stop reaching out to other kids and parents in this situation. American culture is still too freaked out over gays and lesbians to handle TS/TG issues.
Has anyone written a book about JWs and sexuality? If not, we desperately need to put one together. (I'd like to contribute a chapter myself, actually.)
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Hortensia
people have all sorts of reasons for hating each other. It would be nice to get rid of them, and be more tolerant of differences. I think kids can be tough and handle stuff if their parents love them enough.
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GoddessRachel
Chickpea, thank you for teaching me this: for edification and PC-ness, when in doubt, the question to ask: how do you identify? most people in a sexual minority will appreciate a desire to be clear.....
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GoddessRachel
When I use Firefox I can't format my posts for some reason. Chickpea, I also want to say that you are an amazing parent. AMAZING. And yes, it is sad that you are an obvious exception in this area; I'd like to think that is changing as well, starting with parents and families like you and yours. Peace be with all of you. I have a lot to learn from your family. ~Rachel
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aligot ripounsous
Chickpea,
unless one has first hand experience of such an event, I believe one can't really measure the extent of the upheaval that such an event can create in a family. I don't have that experience, so, all that I can offer, as a christian father, is compassion and an attempt to imagine and understand the feelings of the parties involved. All this I wholeheartedly offer to you and the members of your family, with sincere prayers to Jehovah that He may assist you all.
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5go
I would be the exact opposite of your son (currently daughter). I feel for him(her).
I hope it works out.
