AA..Ding Dong round 2

by digderidoo 24 Replies latest jw friends

  • Beda
    Beda

    (I hope this is more readable)

    Hey Digeri, my drinks of choice were beer and wine, too, because hard liquor just got me drunker faster and I didn't enjoy myself as much. Been alcohol free since 1997 when I had a brief relapse during the death throes of my last marriage. Prior to that night (2 or 3 shots of everclear -- tried to down the bottle cut couldnt) I had 6 years 11 months a 8 days of continuous sobriety, and worked the Program of Alcoholics Annonomous as if my life depended on it -- because it did.

    It no longer was a matter of how I felt when I was drinking or not drinking -- the fact for me was I couldn't drink and get drunk , only sick, and I couldn't not drink! I needed to drink!!!

    I've never lost a job to alcoholism; I always was well employed. I've never (yet) had a DWI, but deserved 1000 of them. What I lost was my SELF and my health.

    AA isnt for everyone. So I'm going to suggest you also look at http://www.rational.org Many have found peace and hope there, too.

    If you find yourself back where you're at after working on Rational Recovery, put your head and heart into the AA program. Do 90 in 90, and then do another 90/90. Get a sponsor who will WORK the steps with you. A sponsor is your guide to the AA program of recovery, not a buddy you can wine (pun intended) to.

    The fact of alcoholism is 90% of us die of the disease, be it cirrosis, or auto accident, or suicide, or a fall in the kitchen while drunk, or bleeding to death because an alcoholism caused vericose vein in your esophogus ruptured.

    Bottom line -- no matter what disease you have, it's YOUR CHOICE what YOU decide to do about it.

  • jamiebowers
    jamiebowers

    Take it from someone who was born into a long line of Irish alcoholics: you are going to beat this thing. You are so honest and straight forward about your problem. Accepting the fact that you have a problem is the first and the biggest step. My dear husband drank two fifths of liquor every day for 25 years. He was such a professional alcoholic that he never missed a day of work or failed to take care of the house and the yard. Unless you knew him well, you wouldn't even know he was drunk. He only drank at home to save money and to avoid drinking and driving. Thirteen years ago he quit for seven months and then started again for a few months. Then he quit again. He slipped up a couple of times during business meetings throughout the years, but he never gave up trying. It's been about 8 years, and he hasn't had a drink. He told me that when he accepted the fact that he had to quit drinking every day, he was finally successful. He also told me that although it doesn't bother him to be around people who are drinking now, it did when he was first trying to quit. Now, it just annoys him to be around drunk people, because most of them act stupid. Maybe you could avoid the bar scene for awhile. It will probably help. Good luck and God bless!

  • chickpea
    chickpea

    alcoholism is a complex issue as is ANY addiction....
    so there is likely to be a series of setbacks in anyone's efforts to recover.....
    you can and will figure it out....so dont lose heart!

    i know i cherish my sobriety (altho alcohol was not my drug of choice, i was dependant on illegal substances for nearly 20 years)
    just under 2 years from now will be my 20th year sober

  • Quirky1
    Quirky1

    beda - Welcome to JWD.

    Didg - I too drink a few too many lagers and have been approaching the desire to quit or cut back. I may have a few everynite but I do not get sh#t faced everynite.

    I just like a cold beer, especially when I'm working around the house. Margarita's at the Mexican cantina. Wine at the vineyard. That is about the mix of it.

    And as one said; I should have been given thousands of DUI's.

  • kwr
    kwr

    AA by itself only has a 1% success rate. I suggest you get into a professional outpatient program for further and better support.

  • digderidoo
    digderidoo

    Thanks for your comments, they are always a help.

    Beda, welcome to the board, i haven't read your story yet but you will find alot of support here from ex jw's.

    Paul

  • Hortensia
    Hortensia

    you have my support too, although that isn't my addiction (food food food) I understand the problem. Please please please only drink at home if you are going to drink! I have lost friends to drunk drivers, and I know folks who are spending their lives in prison for manslaughter which would never have happened if they weren't drinking.

  • jaguarbass
    jaguarbass

    Back when I was about your age and out of the tower I spent 7 years in AA the first 2 was starting and stopping and finnally after 2 years I was able to go 5 years without a drink. It was great, kind of like utopia or nirvana. After 7 years I let the good things I learned in AA take me back out and i havent been able to get back.

    The 5 years working the program were the best 5 of my 55 on this planet.

    I always said to myself I was a recovering JW and worked the program from that perspective.

    All good things take time and effort. AA meeting attendance is the price for peace and serenity for folks like us.

  • jaguarbass
    jaguarbass

    You can go get professional therapy for drinking. When you go to a therapist basically they listen and you talk and they can charge hundreds per hour.

    They will listen as far as your insurance will take you. When I went to AA it was free. They passed a basket and many folks put a dollar a meeting in.

    What I gathered after 7 years is fear is what is at the root of peoples problems.

    Love and faith is the answer. And according to AA belief in a higher power.

    There is truth to the joke, "How many therapist does it take to change a light bulb"

    One but it has to really want to change.

    In AA they recommend 90 meetings in 90 days. You have to do that to begin putting on the new personality.

    Or another way of looking at it. You have to put 90 days of good mental protein on top of all of the garbage that you have accumulated over your 38 years on the planet.

    After 90 meetings in 90 days you strart having a fertile soil to work with.

    The reality of 90 meetings in 90 days, along with the joke how many therapist does it take to change a light bulb, is why such a small percentage are successful.

    Because it takes work. Its a do it yourself project that you cant cheat on. If you cut corners and miss meetings you will be back in the jug.

    It works if you work it.

  • digderidoo
    digderidoo

    Thanks jaguarbass, that post means so much.

    Paul

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