I was "disinvited " to my younger brothers babies shower

by sosad 21 Replies latest jw experiences

  • sosad

    because one of the jw invitees heard I was coming and was now part of Babylon the Great. Just to clarify - I am part of nothing in the religious sense- my kids and husband are very Catholic but i am not.

    I was invited and trying to get the address after making considerable efforts to attend due to plain old busy life.

    It seems "new light" says I, a fader of over 20 years is not welcome to a gathering where jws are present. but - not just jws - there would be many other religious denominations present in the form of aunts, grandmothers, parents etc. I thought my husband should go and wear a huge crucifix, but bring the gift and tell the other Catholics why his wife wasn't around. my mom asked me not to tell anyone as it would sound terrible to "other people".

    she - for the first time in my life actually - came down on my side- and didn't attend. I told her she should have - complete with pictutres of her six Catholic grand children.

    but all the jws would have walked had i come in. my bro and his wife felt bad - but i had to ask them what they would do if i was at their house and said jws came over - something that COULD happen. They are adament that it wouldn't in their house, but we will see.

    and to think i was just cutting up the lemon loaf!

  • MissingLink

    Who gives into that kind of crap!? Even when I was "in" if somebody said they weren't coming to my event because of someone else on the list, I'd tell them to shag off then (in a nice way). How can you "unvite" someone!?

    I hate unvitations. One of our friends does this all the time. Not for this reason, just because they change their plans. You look forward to an event all week, and then a few hours before get the univitation call.

  • blondie

    Another level: When I was inactive the first time, my brother got engaged and the family was invited to a shower at her sister's house. Later my mother said it was so sad I refused to attend. My mouth dropped open and I told her I didn't know anything about it. It seems that they had not invited me but gave my mother this little "story" to digest. My mother believed me and track down the party giver and they had a few words. I should have gotten the message then and left for good.


  • oompa
    sosad: my bro and his wife felt bad

    BROTHER!! Sorry sosad, but I find it hard to believe your brother had the balls to get married, much less father a child. I think you could pressed him a bit on the absurdity of this one....others there would have had to "impute wrong motives" about you....not that you are "weak in the faith" but that you are part of Babylon the Great.

    Can you please send me the lemon loaf? I will pay for UPS.......................oompa

  • DaCheech

    at my Co visit last year, during those elders/ms/co meetings was instructed by the co the following:

    if there is a party, gathering, festivity of any sort and a df or person in bad standing is there, all should leave.

    especially if a elder or ms don't follow this advice........ the punishment??? you will be taken off

  • Casper


    I am so sorry that you had to experience such inane behavior...

    I can't believe that these people would hang on to such feelings, after a 20 year span... just turns my stomach.


  • carla

    "my mom asked me not to tell anyone as it would sound terrible to "other people". " -- That's exactly why you should tell as many people as possible. Non jw's are horrified at the treatment of jw's to ex members. Get the word out.

  • wings

    Stories and events like this are mind boggling to say the least. Pety, stupid, immature, assinine are just a few words that come to mind.

    ouch! Sorry.


  • Quandry

    my mom asked me not to tell anyone as it would sound terrible to "other people".

    Yes, it would. She is obviously embarassed by this behaviour, and should be. What love shown on their part. Sorry this happened to you.

  • boyzone

    Tell as many people as you reasonably can within the bounds of normal conversation. The more ordinary people know how ex witnesses are treated, the more they're likely to be told to take a hike at the door.

    I'm regularly treated badly at my son's primary school and where I work. Many of the mums at the school and my work colleagues have asked me why I'm treated like a pariah by former friends. I don't hold back from letting them know. The all-important JW reputation as fine, happy loving christians has hit the dust with about 100 people.

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