When you look back do you wonder how the hell you believed it all ?

by karter 34 Replies latest jw experiences

  • ex-nj-jw

    I wonder how my parents believed and still believe, I wonder how my siblings that are still in still believe even after being df'd numerous times and still probably living a double life. I guess some people need someone or something to give them direction and guidance for every move or decision they make in life. They can't function without the F&DS telling them how to live, breath and behave, even if it's a lie and a bunch of BS.

    I was forced fed this crap from birth, but never believed it. Never interested in the bible and all the doom and gloom, we are better than everyone else BS. I left just as soon as I was no longer a minor. I thank the flying spaghetti monster that I had the brains enough to get my arse out of that cult before I wasted my life and ruined my children! 18 years is all they got from me and I didn't even give 100% to that but I learned how to pretend and play games really well. I can still cry real tears when needed even if I don't want to, learned that from meeting with elders multiple times cause I just couldn't follow the rules. You learn real fast that tears and I'm sorry, I'll never to that again will get you through a JC with no problem. That is unless my elders were just really, really stupid

    Thanks Flying Spaghetti Monster I will be forever indebted to you!


  • LouBelle

    Burn The Ships - me too - except my first word wasn't jehovah.

  • AK - Jeff
    AK - Jeff

    Ever see the movie "Truman"?

    That is how it is for many of us I think. The entire 'set' is contrived carefully to feed the illusion. No one bound Truman to the quaint little world he inhabited - he just did not know there was another one outside the one he was in. The Watchtower was our 'newspaper' - the filter thru which we observed the world around us. The Kingdom Hall was 'city hall'. Our 'work' was the preaching. Our family were the 'brothers and sisters'.

    Until we dared sail into the regions protected by the illusion, we had no idea we were living in one. It sure was nice to find the door.


  • WTWizard

    Simple. I had nothing to use to cross reference anything, and they kept telling me that I had to believe it to live in the new Dark Ages.

    Some things I couldn't believe, even without cross references. Once they told us from the platform that paying twice for the same littera-trash is not double donating, a blatant lie. They also stated that laws against fornication were not fun barriers, which to me was as blatant a lie. And there were the discrepencies between the statement about joy and the rules that undermined it.

  • Quirky1

    What the hell was I thinking?


  • dogisgod

    I was raised in it. Really didn't like not being able to be "normal". Had some difficulty with some of the concepts but can't believe to this day how I swallowed the Gov Body thing. When I was married my husband and I visited NY and toured Bethel, the farm etc. Rather than confirm my faith it shook me up. Now I don't believe in anything, don't trust anything, working on believing in myself. It wrecked my whole family. Oh well, just gotta keep on truckin.

  • Poztate

    The indoctrination starts for a born-in at birth. They are programed to never think or question their beliefs. JW's are not alone in this approach. Mormons come to mind.

    It is hard to shake off a mind set like this. What I find more puzzling is adult converts. They must have needed it badly to believe so easily.(in my opinion)

  • chickpea

    when i was in my early 30s, my older brother died from AIDS..... i had a 4 YO son and a 1 YO daughter at the time....

    the 4 YO ( now 23) asked me "where is uncle michael now?" and i had to tell him " i dont really know.... some people believe __________ ( fill in the blank)."

    less than a year later i miscarried a 22 week pregancy and buried a son, paul benjamin.... again, no answers to the questions we had

    enter the b0rg...... i was readily assimilated...... low hanging fruit is usually the ripest and easiest to pick

    that now 23 YO kid and his 20 YO sister, HUGELY relieved i have snapped the f%ck out of it, say they knew i was "trying to save my children" but have no clue how i swallowed the bait for so long...... i cannot answer that...... what the hell was i thinking?!?! ..... oh! i used the word "thinking" in that question, didnt i? Dumbass

    c/p (of the LHF class)

  • Lo

    I think it's similar to 1984 and Doublethink. You 'believe' what you want to will yourself to believe, because you want it to be true, even though you know it's not. And you know you're only fooling yourself but you do it anyway. Kinda insane looking back on it.

  • Anti-Christ

    It's not a question of belief but a question of knowledge.

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