Need help disassociating

by Lo 31 Replies latest jw experiences

  • wings
    wings

    Lo, Welcome!

    I understand now when you say disassociating. You are using the word as it should be used.

    You can basically handle it anyway you are comfortable with. I agree with oompa, honesty is the best. Just know that you will probably loose whatever friendships you have gained.

    Maybe just start asking questions, and be honest about your concerns.

    wings

  • odie67
    odie67

    Be honest and tell her you wish to stop studying...but if thats to hard for you, just start missing your study...miss meetings make up an excuse like you have to work, school etc...that sister won't keep a relationship with you anyway so it's better to just stop now, if your heart isnt in it, you are wasting your time anyway. I think you should tell her exactly how you feel and why...maybe it will help her too. You will feel better if you confront the situation head on.

  • Awakened at Gilead
    Awakened at Gilead
    Just tell her that you found some information on the INTERNET about Jehovah's Witnesses and their beliefs that you found interesting and wished to share with her.

    www.freeminds.org www.jwfacts.com

    I don't know Poztate if that's the way to go. The sister could get histerical and tell Lo never to look at that stuff again...

    Lo,

    It seems to me that you already have your resons figured out. Since you're not baptized, like oompa said, honesty is good. But don't drag things out just because you have a bond with the sister studying with you...

    [email protected]

  • real one
    real one

    You can tell the sister the information you found out and explain to her that you want to be a follower of Christ and not an organization. I assume this because you are studying the Bible. you may want to do some lengthy research to back up what you show her because she will be very clever with her come backs. Or you can simply tell her you wish to end your study because you have other pursuits.

  • SPAZnik
    SPAZnik

    Can you change your phone number and move?

  • Balsam
    Balsam

    Lo,

    Many years ago I was having a wonderful bible study with a young woman for just over 2 years she was progressing and coming to meetings and thinking of baptism. Then she came across some information about the witnesses even I didn't know. She didn't beat me over the head with it but she said she wanted to stop her bible study and would not returning to the meetings anymore. She told me that though she believed many of the teachings of JW's she didn't agree 100% with them about their interpretation of the end or about God and the world. She didn't get specific but told me she didn't want to hurt me because she cared about our friendship and wished to part friends. I was stunned and unprepared for any of it. I was confused and asked if she could tell me why exactly. She simply said "no", there would be no point and again she wanted us to part friends. I asked her if I could call on her occasionally and see how she was doing and she said sure. I did over the years visit with her and it always gladdened my heart because she was a good person. I often thought Jehovah would not reject such a person from his kingdom and it helped open my mind to people who have other perspectives about God. She always told me about the incredible she believed God had for all mankind no matter their religion, and Jesus confirmed this when he said he was the light of the world.

    Handle her gently with kindness but firmly. Don't get into specifics except about perhaps blood or something easy to point out. Assure her of the fact you care about her and wish her well. I think you will be able to do this, especially since you didn't get baptized that is really the key to everything with the witnesses. Almost no witnesses will get into the blood policy because 99% of them don't understand it themselves much less defend it to someone else.

    Ruth

  • tracyeee
    tracyeee

    I did the same thing after a 2 year study..they were really forcing me to hurry things along, so I told them I had a lot of issues with dedicating myself to an organization.. Believe me,, NOTHING you say will convince them that you might have a good idea. .ever. They will be sad and depressed.. genuinely so.. but are respectful and leave you alone as long as you are not baptized.. You will get memorial invites for sure. Tracy

  • Lo
    Lo

    Aw thanks for the kind words. Yes, I am still a highly dedicated Christian, only I don't want to have to be part of some man's idea of what religion should be to express that. I put my crucifix chain back on this morning and I'm going to wear it proudly from now on!! Idolatry my ass. And I can't change my number, aside from the impracticality, I absolutely LOVE my number! I'm worried about how to answer questions from people in the hall if I see them out and aboot though. For example, yesterday in Marks and Spencers I just saw one of the brothers and had to tell him why I wasn't at the meeting that sunday. I honestly can't wait to have my time back. No getting up ridiculously early on sundays, no missing my last lecture on a tuesday to spend an hour on a bus and not get home until God knows when. And the sister I was studying with had a problem with me donating my time and energy to doing volunteer work. Because obviously she didn't see the point in such 'worldly' activities. Ha. I already feel massively relieved.

  • cognac
    cognac

    Lo, you have no idea just how lucky you are.

    not baptised, no family in the truth (Well, that's what I'm guessing)...

    Welcome!

    Why don't you ask your study conductor why the society didn't allow organ transplants based on cannibalism, then allowed it 13 years later? Ask them if they sent an apology to all the families whose fathers, mothers, sisters and brothers, etc of people that died because they would have been d'f if they didn't follow it and believe this was the "true religion"... If your study conductor tries blaming it on the whole blood thing, tell him/her that's not true, because the society never mentioned that, they only said cannibolism. If the try stating that organ transplants were new back then and the person probably would have died anyways, call bs. That's just friggin stupid.

    There are a billion other things... Tell him/her that you don't want to be associated with a religion that's guilty of murder. I don't think God would like that to much...

    Sorry to go off on a little tangent.

    Anyways, welcome. Poke around a bit, ask questions. We are all here to support eachother. Oh, and feel free to ignore my little tangents, lol!

  • AK - Jeff
    AK - Jeff

    Looks like you have a good start on making the exit, from what you stated above. Well wishes to you in all you do in life.

    I was puzzled by this statement:

    And I can't change my number, aside from the impracticality, I absolutely LOVE my number!

    Did I miss something? What did you mean? Just curious.

    Again, Welcome, and all the best as you move forward with the choice that will keep you from slavery to men's ideas.

    Jeff

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