My .02 is that you've told her, you've done your part. For the next few calls just don't talk about religion at all. You know how irritating that preachyness from the witnesses is. That feeling that the only reason that they ever want to talk is to witness? You don't want her to start to feel that the only reason that you call is to anti-witness!
My JW Daughter Calls Me - First Time in 9 Months - Great Conversation !
by flipper 42 Replies latest jw friends
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flipper
TRUTHSEARCHER- I agree with you ! We need to show love, love, love to the witness relatives we have. Show it to them more than they get it in the organization ! I will show my daughter lots of it !
BILLY the ex BETHELITE- I will always be there for her ! And hopefully the elders won't say too much too much weird crap to her ! But I'm going to get the emotional relationship going and ease off laying on the information somewhat now ! Let her digest it !
DAWG- Thanks my friend, love ya bro !
MKR 32208- I agree with what you say. I've done my part right now in laying out the information. I'm gonna ease off that somewhat and draw closer to her in an emotional relationship , perhaps having lunch soon or something like that. I don't want to get too preachy with her , you are right ! Peace out, Mr. Flipper -
owenfieldreams
Flipper,
Your daughter will always love you, regardless of your views toward the org to which that she chooses continued association. It's good to hear that you've had some communication with her. Hope you have many more good conversations with her!
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AK - Jeff
Beautiful. Just beautiful.
Take whatever direction she lets the conversations take. Control the direction where you can - but don't force it.
I have a theory that all Jw's have 'watershed' moments in which doubts sprang up and were normally put back to sleep again. Over time, enough of these moments - moments of lucid thought amidst the mind-numbing cult control that permeates Jw lifestyle - and eventually something clicks that forces true investigation into the religion. I believe this has always been the case - but the tools to investigate were not always at the ready. Now the Internet is here. At some point, those with enough weight on the other end of the teeter will type in a search engine the words "Jehovah's Witnesses" and perhaps a topic of sensitivity to them, and VOILA! Reality begins to wage war with fantasy.
Keep making those priceless contributions to her 'watershed' moments. Ideas and thoughts that will stick there. Someday she may call you and say she needs to share some info that she has learned on the Internet [or elsewhere] about her faith. Bingo! I hope it is soon - but you are taking the right approach - let her slowly deconstruct her own 'truth' and replace it with reality. One brick at a time.
Thanx for sharing.
Jeff
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flipper
OWENFIELDREAMS- Thanks, I know she loves me . And I feel we will have many more meaningful conversations as time goes on !
AK JEFF- I will let her guide the direction of the conversation . I'll be smart - not force things. One brick at a time. And let her find out her own " watershed " moments - that's what I'll do - My part is to be there for her as she finds out no matter what ! Thanks ! Peace out, Mr. Flipper -
besty
It would be interesting to know what her internal conversation is. She has obviously given herself permission to pursue the topic with you - but why?
Possibly trying to reach out to you to win the lost soul?
Or maybe has recently become curious for a reason you don't know about. With most people that eventually leave a cult it is a 1-2 combination punch that makes them start looking outside for new references, or forces them to reconsider what they have accepted to that point. So perhaps she is prepared to explore the '2' having already had the '1' - maybe try to probe for what has changed recently for her, other than it being Memorial season, to make her spend way more time than necessary inviting you.
Of course if she is consciously trying to get you back as opposed to subconsciously checking things out then you need to be gently prodding her conscience, and nothing better than mishandled child abuse to do that. -
LouBelle
Ah Mr. Flipper - you are one hellofa dolphine you know that - you handle yourself so well in those situations. I applaud you for being so loving, really taking your daughters reactions/feelings to heart. I pray that this open communication continues. And just continue being the loving father that you are.
All the best to you, Mrs. Flipper and "Baby" Flipper.
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blondie
A very loving approach, Flipper. All you can do is plant seeds for thought and hope their heart listens.
Love, Blondie
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nomoreguilt
Mr Flipper...As usual , you have my full support and undevided attention as regards your sitution with your kids. Kudos to you.... Points very diplomaticly but firmly approached.
Take care friend
NMG
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Billzfan23
What an inspiring story...great to hear good news!