by BBOARD 32 Replies latest jw friends
bttt
PLEASE HELP TULA (see above post)
If there was ever an issue close to Tula's heart, this is it.
Can these adult children overcome this "self-imposed retardation"?
What can you say or do to make a parent realize they have stolen, thwarted and sacrified their child's life?
What is the future for an adult-child like this when the parents die?
btt
Some of it is just the bad economics. Rent is high, and if you do want to buy, you can't get sh** for your money.
Some of it is just the bad economics. Rent is high, and if you do want to buy, you can't get sh** for your money.
This has absolutely NOTHING to do with the economy.
This adult child owns a house which he rents out. He has never lived there.
When confronted with the issue of adult child at home, the parents say "oh, he has his own house."
Yes, he does. But it is a "cover up". I think they sorta know something is not normal in their household.
Would appreciate if any one would read my earlier posts on this thread and give thoughts.
Thank you.
Hmm.
I raised both my kids to be good jaydubs – discouraged working and college and actually homeschooled both of them.
Neither of them were ever baptized and both began thinking for themselves at an early age.
My daughter – the younger kid – is still living at home at 24 and has yet to hold her first paid job. She says it's partly because of being so traumatized by neighborhood gang activity that she was, until recently, afraid to leave the house. Seriously: some thugs who were trying to recruit a friend of hers threatened to beat her if she didn't cooperate with them.
But she tells me now that the biggest cause of this apparent slackerdom is that it only dawned on her a few months ago that she has a future. Because, you know, Armageddon ain't coming. As soon as she had that epiphany, she drew up a five-year plan for independence, which she is working on now.
OTOH, my son got his first paid job at 15 (without asking us first), left home at 18 (without asking us first), got married a couple years ago, and bought a house.
Same environment, same weird religious upbringing, similar genes, different results.
I dunno.
gently feral
Another observation about this adult/child:
When other people are around, he will sit off to the side by himself. I think maybe he is listening or watching, but he does not participate nor interact withanyone. He rarely speaks or makes eye contact.
He will act nonchalant, usually with his head down, or picking at his shoe laces with a stick, or something moron-ish.
He never initiates conversation.
If you try to include him, he will leave the area. It's like he wants to just be the fly on the wall.
What does this mean?
btt
Here's the reality. Gas is expensive. Housing is expensive. Everything's expensive. If you want to live in an area that isn't economically dead and offers real jobs, prepare to pay through the nose. "Failure To Launch" was something to be ashamed of back in the '90's. Now, with a house, or even an apartment in a place that offers real hope going around $500 a month for starters, there's really no option than to live with mommy and daddy. And 500$ a month doesn't count gas, tuition and car payments.
This has absolutely NOTHING to do with the economy.
This adult child owns a house which he rents out. He has never lived there.
When confronted with the issue of adult child at home, the parents say "oh, he has his own house."
Yes, he does. But it is a "cover up". I think they sorta know something is not normal in their household.
Would appreciate if any one would read my earlier posts on this thread and give thoughts.
Thank you.
Ummm....
My comments weren't directed at you...just a general commentary on the unbalanced situation where I live...
Example: In 2003, my friend worked for a brother's real estate company. They were selling crappy one-bedroom studios in a beach area for $375,000.
Some of this I'd just like to point out is the result of the economic situation regarding rental accommodations and general living costs.
I myself was out on my own at 19 and in comparison for a 19 yr. old to do that today without a very good job is almost impossible.
So its not necessarily a religious reason.
