Did You Purposely Avoid Certain People In Your Hall???

by minimus 16 Replies latest jw friends

  • minimus

    I knew of some elders that were very intimidated by a certain elder's wife. She regularly wrote letters to the Society and Circuit Overseer telling them about the foibles of certain elders. She was the type that when she raised her hand for a comment that you BETTER call on her or you'd be approached by her right after the meeting.

    I know of an elder that used to terrorize many in his congregation. He was the PO and believed he wasgifted with special discernment and wisdom. He felt he could read people and if he believed that you were not on the up and up, he'd relentlessly go after you.

    Were there certain ones in your Hall that you stayed away from??

  • Rooster

    Yes, when I went those with bad breath were notorious for said bad breath. The breath was so bad it made your eyes water. Brother Wilson was one of these bad breath breathers.

  • 4digitcode

    i avoided the people i had nothing to say to. i hated having to say



    how are you


    so...............................how are the kids?

    who the hell cares. i don't know you. goodbye.

  • RR

    I just avoid the whole hall! ... lol

  • JH

    Yes, I avoided a few, cause I knew how they would try to manipulate me in doing more.

    I also avoided a brother in particular that was VERY manipulative, who would say, "what are you doing tomorrow"....so I would say, "I don't know yet, it's not tomorrow yet....then he would say, "come and pick me up, we will go out in the field service".....then I would say, "I'm not sure if I'll be going out in the field service tomorrow, I'll see that tomorrow", then he would say, "why wait for tomorrow, lets get organized now"?......or he would stop over my place and say, "Are you happy being single"? and I would say," I don't mind"......then he would say, "Well, wouldn't you be happier if you were married? don't you think you'll get married one day", so I say "maybe, time will tell"....so he says, he would like to meet a sister too so why don't we go to different congregations sometimes and have a look arouond and see if there are any single sisters"....so I say, "if you want to go, you don't need me", then he gets angry becasue he doesn't want to go alone.

    He is a brother that constantly is manipulating everyone. He is in his mid 50,s and not so good looking and single and a pain in the a** and most in the congregation know that but are polite with him, but distant.

    So, since he is single, he tries to hang around with the single brothers to manipulate them again and again...

    Once about 10 years ago, he came over and knew I was inactive, and said to me, the assembly in Montreal will be next week, are you going he asks? I said I don't know yet. Then he replied, "Do you atleast feel like going, as to make me feel bad.... I said I don't know, maybe i will maybe I wont. There might be a snow storm and I won't go...lol

    He had an old car back then, and was trying to get a ride with me so that he wouldn't have to take his car.

    Yes I avoided him all the time, so did many...

    Oh, and once he organized a pre jWatchtower study at another brother's apartment, just single brothers, so that we could be well prepared for the Watchtower study on Sunday....

    So, about 7 or 8 single brothers showd up, so did I, and I remember an elder saying not to do this because its a group within a group and it wasn't right because the Watchtower didn't organize it....lmao

    That brother was pissed.....and I was happy... I didn't need a 6th meeting

  • WTWizard

    The more they used specious reasoning to get me to do more and to obey certain rules, and insist on its being of accuracy, the more I tended to stay away from those people. In fact, most of the hounders fit that category perfectly.

    There was one hounder that I used to get rides to and from the Kingdumb Hell. He was less than 1/10 mile away from me, yet insisted on charging me money to get to the Hells. He also had specious logic to impose strict rules on me that were totally unnecessary (like the white shirt rule), and would frequently tell me that he was going to be ready to leave "in a minute". I timed his "minute", and more often than not it ran more than 10 minutes, with more than one "In a minute" thrown in. When I confronted him about his wretched sense of time, he said that he meant "a New York minute" (for those who are not familiar with the expression "New York minute", it is an extremely SHORT time, not longer than a minute as he had claimed). And "reasonability" went right out the window. He knew that my work schedule was quite tight after the meeting.

    Generally, all the hounders and most of the "brothers(??)" do similar things. Specious arguments, twisting the meanings of words, and generally being unreasonable all turned me off. Ultimately, I just gave up and quit going to meetings altogether, and to boot I made extra work for them when they wanted to figure out whose job it was to hound and harass me.

  • RisingEagle

    I only avoided two. The first one was short and round, wore red all the time and never took off their sunglasses. j/k

    I did in fact avoid one brother like the plague. He was a hitter. Someone who had an annoying habit of emphasizing points in their speech by striking others with the back of the hand somewhere between the stomach and the chest. Usually adding his favorite word, "huh? huh?" with each hit.

    It didn't hurt at all, it was just irritating as all get out. "Did you hear that talk on xxxx? Xxxx's are gonna regret it when armageddon comes. Huh? (whack) Huh? (whack)"

    Now that I think about it he was a grabber also. When you would get enough of being whacked by the guy and you made an excuse to walk away, he would suddenly remember something he just had to relate to you, so he would take hold of you by the forearm as if to stop you from leaving.

    "This is my personal hoola-hoop. Do not enter into the space within my hoola-hoop unless you have express written permission from the hoola-hoop owner. Trespassers will be violated."



    I always avoided the ones who thought they were sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much better than everyone else. Now I avoid them all. I can play their game of shunning just as easily.


  • LongHairGal

    Yes. Over the years there were several who I avoided for various reasons. I also never bought into the mindset they tried to sell that I had to 'accept' everybody as my friend. I don't think so! Some people are clearly not good for your mental health and you should not have them around you.

    Those I avoided ranged from nervy or arrogant elders who thought they could say anything they damn well pleased to me and 'friends' who were always looking for people to do favors for them. I also stayed a million miles from any conceited, puffed up types. I also avoided types who seemed 'controlling' and 'aggressive'. I also avoided those who used the platform to spout things that were bothering them personally. I also avoided those who were members of 'prominent' or extended families who thought who the hell they were and acted as if everybody in the hall was there to help them or work for them.

    I am sure there were those who avoided me because I had to speak up and stand my ground. Oh, well, such is life.


  • changeling

    You mean kinda like how you avoid me?


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