by changeling 20 Replies latest watchtower bible
Then could you do me a favor and look up at tula's thread on this page that reads:" For a good time...call"?
I wrote a stroy on that thread (it's unfinished) and I would like your honest opinions and critique.
I'm thinking of publishing some material I've written and I'd like your opinions on my style.
Please be honest.
Thanks,
changeling
ABSOLUTELY!
I couldn't "put it down"! I read all of it ... was the German CO the "roast pork"? He musta been really tasty with all those ingested onions [or did he just wind up down in the ravine for the creatures of Montana to pick apart?]. Please clarify.
In any event, I do hope the little heroine of the story is getting her fill at long last!
CoCo
HaHa! No, not this time...she just got a little taste pushing and shoveing him down the hill.
Thanks,
changeling
I wrote a stroy on that thread (it's unfinished) and I would like your honest opinions and critique.
I'm thinking of publishing some material I've written and I'd like your opinions on my style.
Please be honest.
Thanks,
changeling
Do you have a good editor? If you don't, then I have only two words for you: Spell Check.
Sylvia
Great post Changeling!!
Here's a link to the thread you are talking about before it gets buried.
http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/10/142751/1.ashx
You've got quite a knack for story telling and a creative bent that I envy. Snowbird's right about the spelling, but I'm pretty sure you were just looking for overall impressions on your style. I can easily turn off my "proofreader" eye as far as typos go.
Before I get into an opinion on your style I'd like to say right up front that I think it's great that you're sharing this here. I kind of wish JWD had a little "Aspiring Writers Corner" or something like that. Most of what I post is just fluffy "first thing that crosses my mind" kinds of things. But now and then I try posting something that I've put some time into polishing up just a bit. Soooo....you asked for honesty, so here goes.
It kind of reads like a bit of a screenplay, or perhaps a narration that would be read while the events described unfold on screen. What I'm getting at is there's an emotional distance to what you've written especially since it's written in a 3rd person voice. It's very clever and tongue-in-cheek and I've enjoyed it so far. I think it may become a little tiresome if a whole lot more of the story continued being written in this style. I'm kind of waiting for this "introduction" to end and for the "real life" here and now scenes to start with more emotional "meat on the bones". Does that make sense?
I loved some of the mental images you created! "gallons of onion breath" in particular. Hilarious!
Finally, please take what I say with a big ol' chunk of rock salt. All I did was take a couple English courses in college. Never even got my degree. But I love a good read.
Keep up the good work Changeling!!
Open Mind
Do I love ya? You bet your a$$! I will check it out. JK
i loved it
i loved it
i loved it
big let down when you got tired and didnt finish
james t
Thank you sooo much guys!
Yeah, I know about my spelling. It sucks. When I use "word" I spell check (there goes the font again, I can't firgure out how that happens), but so far my cries for a spell checker on JWD have fallen on deaf ears.
Open mind: you are so insightful! I was writting as if it were a screenplay, because that's what tula was looking for. It was a lark, really, just to play with tula. I normally write short essays about personal observations. I've tried to put them on JWD, but so far I haven't figured out how to get them out of "word" and onto here.
I'm creative but technically challenged!
Love you guys,
changeling
Thank you sooo much guys!
Yeah, I know about my spelling. It sucks. When I use "word" I spell check (there goes the font again, I can't firgure out how that happens), but so far my cries for a spell checker on JWD have fallen on deaf ears.
Open mind: you are so insightful! I was writting as if it were a screenplay, because that's what tula was looking for. It was a lark, really, just to play with tula. I normally write short essays about personal observations. I've tried to put them on JWD, but so far I haven't figured out how to get them out of "word" and onto here.
I'm creative but technically challenged!
Love you guys,
changeling
Changeling,
Here's how to release the "hounds" from Word onto JWD.
1. Type it in Word.
2. Spell Check it.
3. Open up Notepad or Wordpad if you've got a PC.
4. Select all the text in your Word document & copy it into Notepad.
5. Select all the text in Notepad and right-click "Copy". (It's now on your virtual "clipboard". You can't see it. It's a concept. Kind of like God. You've gotta have faith here. Teezin'. I digress. )
6. Start a thread on JWD or click "Reply" to an existing one.
7. Click on the "Paste" button in JWD or right click and click Paste if your using Firefox as a browser.
Forgive me if my instructions are overly detailed. I'm "technically challenged" myself and plenty of times all it takes is one tiny little detail for me to screw up.
Hope this helps.
Open Mind
