God help me - Just finished Crisis of Conscience (page 4)

willyloman

Orgull: Now you know. It's not you. It's not the congregation. It's not the elders in your congregation. The problem is systemic.

unique1

Having your eyes opened for the first time is a scary experience. It gets easier.

I did call Ray to tell him of this post.... I always feel it must be encouraging to know that the many years He spent in bondage has its rewards...
He was pleased to know another is free. Truth must be told.
He is feeling his age. I spoke to Cynthia,,,she is not bad, has the same aches & pains as all us oldies, & some of you younguns .have
Thought you would all like to know how Ray & Cynthia is. It was because of their honesty many of us could rethink our stand....

BluesBrother

I feel like I just died. I also feel like I've just been born.

Well said Orgull, We know what you mean. Welcome to our community

LongHairGal

Orgull:

You are right about how we can't have somebody else's faith or a 'borrowed' faith. In all honesty, I never really believed it all but kept my doubts to myself.

I remember reading a sign somewhere that said: "A person convinced against his will is of his own opinion still."

LHG

fullofdoubtnow

Well done Orgull, you are at the start of a journey that will eventually lead to your freedom from the wts. It won't be easy, but nothing worthwhile ever really is. It'll be scary as well, having been in a cult for so long and striking out on your own. Most of all though, it will be worth whatever you have to do to complete the journey, because freedom lies at the end of it, and you can't put a price on that.

Take care, and good luck!

Linda

RollerDave

Good on you, Orgull!

And missing a meeting to read CoC?

Beautiful! Poetic justice at it's sweetest.

Opening your eyes to the real world can be scary, but it gets better in time.

At least now you know that the life you build will actually count instead of being wasted effort.

The bitterness is natural and just goes to show that you really ARE free now.

As always, if I can be of service, I am but a PM away.

RD

Mulan

After reading CoC, I feel like I just died. I also feel like I've just been born.
A while back I said I felt no resentment, but I'm beginning to. The first half of my life was spent living a lie. That bothers me and will probably go on bothering me for the rest of my life.

Exactly how I felt after I finished reading it. We were doing a slow fade, but after reading that book, I never could bear to go back. I was sooooo done.

Orgull

Thanks for all the wonderful encouraging comments.

@ Mulan: I'm having that very problem. I've missed both meetings now since reading it. I don't know if I can face going back at all.

flipper

Orgull, welcome my friend to the rest of your new life ! As many have said, we felt like you did after reading the book. My emotions went back and forth from righteous indignation on how Ray Franz and others in Bethel were treated and feeling sorry for all those still in who are being duped to believe this cult has any answers for them about life. But most of all it confirmed what I had already been convincing myself of, that all of the current crises in that organization, molestation settlements, blood transfusion crises, and other wrongs done by them, have just been a snowball effect getting bigger and bigger as the 20th century progressed till now ,when it is undeniable and damning to their organization.

May you have peace my friend, and remember you are among friends here who will show unconditional love for you ! Take care, Mr. Flipper

God help me - Just finished Crisis of Conscience