Ouch that hurts

by lola28 19 Replies latest jw friends

  • lola28
    lola28

    I just feel so empty, I miss so many of my old friends, There's only one thing running thru my head "I loved you guys, I loved you so much."

    Lola

  • Sassy
    Sassy

    lol.. one of these days we do need to get together...

    I wish one day to see the Lakers.. but .. another occasion is cool too..

    hang in there!

  • jaguarbass
    jaguarbass

    I just feel so empty, I miss so many of my old friends, There's only one thing running thru my head "I loved you guys, I loved you so much."

    Lola

    If I loved and missed the witnoids, I probably would have stayed and gone into the hypocrite mode, or put 3/4 of my brain on a shelf and hung out at the kingdumb hall. People are people and the witnoids didnt serve any purpose for me. But if they do for you, go back and enjoy the ride. Most Baptist and catholics and Christians I have encountered seem to be hypocrites also so pick your poison. Pay your money and take your chances.

  • Open mind
    Open mind

    & for Lola.

    Sorry you're hurting.

    Have you read James Thomas' latest thread? Purplesofa was lamenting the passing of summer and then went on to lost loves. James has some very comforting and empowering words.

    Here's the link:

    http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/140493/1.ashx

    And here's the interchange between Purps & James I'm particularly thinking of. Take care. Open Mind

    ************************************************

    Purps:

    As I was driving home last night, the air felt like the beginnings of Fall, I know how that feels, when summer ends. the sounds, the smell, What nature begins to look like, getting ready for fall. I began to cry. Where had my summer gone?

    When there is no story of loss and remorse, what is here? In this instance it was the exquisite senses of a soon to arrive Autumn; along with the unspoken message from nature that as the seasons change, everything in our life changes too. This, is how it really IS, and to fight it, is insane. So, yes, appreciate what was; and even more important appreciate the present moment of what IS, for it will change as well. Less story, more reality, and life automatically becomes richer and more joyous. Whether we are with some one, or alone.

    Where had all my old lovers gone. Why was I alone?

    I would not trade anything for the loves I have had in my life. However fleeting they were true and honest, real, intense, deep, sharing. We all had come together at a time in our lives for whatever reason and shared, expericanced for me LOVE.

    I have found the most loving gesture was gracefully letting the experiance be over when it really was over and not hang on, lie to myself and say I hated this person, fool myself into thinking it was forever. So now I can carry the love that was expericanced and still feel it even now.

    Truly letting go, can be very sweet and refreshingly freeing; and generally all we are letting go of is a story in our mind that has nothing to do with the reality of the present moment anyway. So, we lose a little and gain a lot.

    I would like to say to everyone who is reading this, that what is critical is to make a conscious choice to be in the moment and silently and nonjudgmentally feel the aliveness and at the same time notice the mind chattering away as it interprets and weaves a story. I can not stress it enough how important it is to come to a clear recognition of the difference between thought and story, and actual Reality. This is a huge step in coming to awaken to our genuine unbroken wholeness.

    j

  • outnfree
    outnfree

    ((((lola)))

    I, too, have left most of my friends behind, and feel lonely lots of the time. I miss my friend, Dee, most of all, but there are others, too.

    I'm sorry you're lonely right now. It hurts when we feel so much love for people, and it doesn't feel like it's returned. I was lucky in that a friend of mine who left the organization a couple of years before me accepted my apology after I DA'd myself. We are close friends again. Even on the inside, I had never stopped loving her.

    Perhaps you will have a similar experience some day. I hope so.

    out

  • free2think
    free2think

    ((((((((((hugs)))))))))))

  • lola28
    lola28

    I should explain, it's not the religion I miss, it's some of the people. I don't miss everyone but I have more then a few that were like family. It's hard to know that those relationships are dead because there is no way that I would ever go back, your head knows you are doing the right thing but your heart still misses the people.

    Lola

  • RAF
    RAF

    ... ...

  • Madame Quixote
    Madame Quixote

    Attachments and Expectations. Only being human. It can hurt a lot. This will pass. Hugs!

  • changeling
    changeling

    I'm sorry you're having a bad day Lola. I hope you feel better tomorrow.

    changeling

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